Looking for a few ideas

Adrini76

I'm dealing with a sensitive issue. I'm looking for a quiet, personal, unobtrusive way to deal with this.

My family is Catholic. My FI's family is Catholic. I'm Pagan/Unitarian and FI's Agnostic. 

We're having a Unitarian Ceremony, which everyone has agreed to. The FI  is fine with it to. I'm looking for some little Pagan detail for myself. Nothing that will get people upset, but something I will know. 

So far I have a few major ideas

- Some kind of custom made wedding ring with Pagan inscription. On the inside so it's not visible. 

- use the Neoclassical theme as an excuse for having statues of the Gods in the tables. 

Just two ideas. Any one have any thoughts?

vlevitt

could you include some version of handfasting into your ceremony, or could your officiant make an unobtrusive mention of the four directions?  Not sure if it's possible to be unobtrusive in that way, but it's a thought.    before you walk down the aidle (assuming there is an aisle), is there a meditation or a chant or a ritual you could do for yourself with some close friends that will feel honouring of your beliefs?

then again, i think it's important that you be able to express your spiritual beliefs at your own wedding.  it's nice that you don't want anyone to feel uncomfortable, but this is YOUR wedding, and it's all ABOUT spirituality, beliefs, faith, connection with god/goddess, so to deny yourself that would be sad, i think.

just my two cents. 

Adrini76

Which is why I'm looking for my own way to honor it. I also have to tell the MIL and FIL about the whole pagan thing. Fi's sibs all know already. 

I'm not huge on ceremony. I'm big on observing in more of a day to day basis. That's why I like the statue idea. I can have Hera, Isis, and Frigga there in a decorative theme, and the guests will think it's part of the neoclassical theme. All that matters is that the Gods are honored at the event. 

I wish more people were open to this. But until they are I have to be careful. 

jenn.daniel

I like both your ideas.  As a guest, I would think classical statues would be awesome.

handfast4me

Merry Meet!

Just google "Subtle Handfasting"  You'll get lots of ideas from other Pagans who are in the broom closet.  We had a full-on Pagan handfasting as our betrothal ceremony, then a year later had the legal wedding.  Since our legal ceremony was performed by someone who was not a High Priestess (but interestingly, we found out after we hired her that she was also a Pagan), we didn't do any of the real rites except cakes and ale.  However, we included this in our ceremony, too, which I think sort of gives a subtle Pagan flavor to the ceremony:

In times past it was believed that the human soul shared characteristics with all things divine. It is this belief which assigned virtues to the cardinal directions; East, South, West and North. It is in this tradition that a blessing is offered in support of this ceremony.Blessed be this union with the gifts of the East.
Communication of the heart, mind, and body
Fresh beginnings with the rising of each Sun.
The knowledge of the growth found in the sharing of silences.Blessed be this union with the gifts of the South.
Warmth of hearth and home
The heat of the heart's passion
The light created by both to illuminate the darkest of times.Blessed be this union with the gifts of the West.
The deep commitments of the lake The swift excitement of the river
The refreshing cleansing of the rain
The all encompassing passion of the sea.Blessed be this union with the gifts of the North
Firm foundation on which to build
Fertility of the fields to enrich your lives
A stable home to which you may always return.Each of these blessings emphasizes those things which will help you build a happy and successful union.
Yet they are only tools.
Tools which you must use together in order to create what you seek in this union.

and:

All things in Nature are circular. Night becomes day, day becomes night and night becomes day again.The moon waxes and wanes and waxes again.There is Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter, and then the Spring returns.As the seasons cycle, there is the cycle of Life, Death, and rebirth.These are part of the Great Mysteries of Life.A ring is an unbroken circle, a symbol of unity, of unending love,of the sun and the earth and the moon, representative of this greater circle of life. It is also a symbol of continuity, worn on the third finger, because the ancient Greeks believed that a vein from that finger leads directly to the heart.
Blessed Be!