Texas-Dallas and Ft. Worth

Who to walk with me down the aisle?

Its only a few months before the big day & I have no clue on who to walk me down the aisle. My dad isn't going to be there. My stepdad was going to walk me but after alot of drama, I don't want him to anymore. I've already asked him but recent events has changed my mind. Now I'm left with 3 choices: My Uncle, my brother, & my grandpa. I have a very close family & any would do it in a heartbeat. But I dont want to hurt any feelings.

My dad wasnt around much when I was growing up & my Uncle & Grandpa both were there as male role models for me. I'm extremely close to both. And regardless who walks me down the aisle I'm having special dances with both at the reception. At family Christmas parties both hinted at wanting to walk with me down the aisle.

My brother on the other hand, is just 1 1/2 older than me so as any brother-sister relationships, growing up we didnt always get along. But the last few years we've became really close. The down side with him is he's very camera shy (my mom basically had to sneak pictures of him at his own wedding). So I dont know how the pictures with him would turn out (typically the pictures we have of him have his hand over his face).

I dont know how to pick someone without hurting someone else's feelings. I love all 3 but which one to have that honor?
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Re: Who to walk with me down the aisle?

  • edited December 2011
    There is always the option of you walking down the aisle by yourself.  You don't have to have someone else walk you down the aisle.  You could walk halfway and have your FI walk down toward you halfway, then you could walk up together.

    Also, does your stepdad know he will no longer be walking you down the aisle.  Will it be uncomfortable since you already asked him?  It's usually not the best idea to "un-ask" someone you have already asked.

    Also, if your brother is camera-shy, then you can have your uncle and your grandpa walk you down the aisle.  One on each side - so feelings would not be hurt. Or if you are close to your mom - she could walk you down the aisle. 

    Hmm... did I help any?  :)
  • bigbabyfacebigbabyface member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You don't have to just have ONE person do it :)
     
    You have have two if you'd like. There's no rules. Heck, you can walk down by yourself to save you some heart ache. Just make sure which ever one you choose, YOU'RE happy with. This day is for you and your FI, make it special for you.

    ETA: looks like Lacey beat me too the submit button. But she's right on :)
  • MLandCJMLandCJ member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Just an idea. Why don't you walk by your self?

    That way your uncle and grandpa's feelings don't get hurt. Your brother's camera shyness won't be an issue.
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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_texas-dallas-ft-worth_walk-down-aisle?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:102Discussion:fd7d4835-dc35-4382-b27c-4db2607720a4Post:3d796e13-1ec3-4be1-aa5a-73f466e1d05f">Re: Who to walk with me down the aisle?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Also, if your brother is camera-shy, then you can have your uncle and your grandpa walk you down the aisle.  One on each side - so feelings would not be hurt. Posted by serlace[/QUOTE]

    This is what I was going to suggest too. : )
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_texas-dallas-ft-worth_walk-down-aisle?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:102Discussion:fd7d4835-dc35-4382-b27c-4db2607720a4Post:75601d55-0165-4579-988c-b2a660f38f5d">Re: Who to walk with me down the aisle?</a>:
    [QUOTE]You don't have to just have ONE person do it :)   You have have two if you'd like. There's no rules. Heck, you can walk down by yourself to save you some heart ache. <strong>Just make sure which ever one you choose, YOU'RE happy with. This day is for you and your FI, make it special for you.</strong> ETA: looks like Lacey beat me too the submit button. But she's right on :)
    Posted by bigbabyface[/QUOTE]

    Yes, hurt feelings aside, you should choose the one you want.  :)
  • MLandCJMLandCJ member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_texas-dallas-ft-worth_walk-down-aisle?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:102Discussion:fd7d4835-dc35-4382-b27c-4db2607720a4Post:cc43fa97-52fe-4cfc-ab43-43e0380474d1">Re: Who to walk with me down the aisle?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Who to walk with me down the aisle? : Yes, hurt feelings aside, you should choose the one you want.  :)
    Posted by serlace[/QUOTE]
    THIS!
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  • edited December 2011
    I agree with PP do what you feel you should in your heart.  If thats choosing one and hurting feelings, having both, or choosing none and walking by yourself.  You are the one that needs to be happy in that moment.
  • edited December 2011
    I agree with all PP's, do what you feel most comfortable with.

    If it were me, I'd probably walk by myself.   Especially if un-invited step-dad will be in attendance.   That would make it less awkward and not seem like you replaced him.
  • fallbride1109fallbride1109 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011

    Although my father was present, I chose to walk by myself.  I didn't want him walking me down the aisle for several reasons so I chose to walk alone and it was perfectly fine.  Ben came up and met me halfway.

  • edited December 2011
    Not that this is necessarily the answer for you, but why does everyone seem to forget the mom is also an option.  I love my dad and step-father, but at least in my case, my mom was the main parent supporting me my entire life. It makes sense that I'd want her to support me as I walk towards my future.
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  • msealemseale member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    My dad passed away, and I had the same delima as to who to walk me down the aisle.  Ask whomever you want.  Don't worry about camera fright, un-inviting, other feelings getting hurt.  If they all care about you, then they will  understand.  But do it for YOU, not them.

    My brother is extremely shy, but he walked me down the aisle.  The cameras, etc were the furthest thing from our mind.  I loved that he did it, b/c in the 10 minutes or so that we were in the back of the church waiting to walk, we got to talk, he relaxed me.  It was really sweet and meant a lot to me.
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  • edited December 2011

    I've been struggling with the same problem. I really wanted my mom and step-dad to give me away, but that would crush my Dad. My Dad hasn't really been involved with my life very much the past few years and hardly even knows my FI.

    To save me some trouble and drama I'm asking my Dad and Step-dad to both walk me down the aisle. I thought about walking by myself, but thought that would be a little awkward.

    Good Luck!

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