I don't get along with the Best Man!

shayrenee86

My fiance' insists his brother be the Best Man. Due to past incidences of huge personal disrespect to me, I don't agree. He said some very nasty things and I can't see him giving a speech at the wedding, wishing us well. Would a compromise be excluding a speech from him?

amagwire

That's a tough situation, but I think it's a fair compromise.  Essentially the best man is standing in support of the groom and the bride...but if he's disrespected you in the past, it sounds like he wouldn't have anything sincere to say about your marriage.  In this situation I would probably forget the speech, in the name of keeping the peace. 

salt78

So is his brother actually on board with being the best man if he doesn't agree with your marriage?

sophs_ro

why is your FI wanting someone to be his best man that has been disrespectful to you in the past? Was it just a snub that could be forgiven or was it a real unforgivable thing?

duckie1905

My question is more why would your FI pick someone as his best man that has openly disrespected you in the past?

Red flag.

ces25c

I don't know how you could just skip his speech unless you don't do speeches altogether.
Can he give a speech where he just tells a cute childhood story about your fiance or something and end with, "I can't believe he's finally getting married," or something along those lines?  He wouldn't have to say how great he thinks you are if you don't get along, but if he can't be polite enough to give a simple toast it doesn't seem like he would want to be there anyway.