Father/Daughter Dance

Dlutz828

Hi,

Over the last few years my father has spiraled down involving drinking and has made a choice not to be involved in mine or my sisters lives.  I have made peace that he will not be at my wedding to walk me down the aisle (my mom will be :-) ), however when ever I think about the father/daughter dance I get a little upset.  I was never a daddy's girl so it was never a dream for me to dance with him... but it is usually part of the reception.  (After our first dance of course)

So I do not know if I should ask one of my uncles to step in... I am very close to 4 of them and do not know if I should choice one or just leave that part out of the wedding.  My fiance will be doing a mother/son dance.  Does anyone have any advice? 

526SadieSadie

I love the idea of a dance with your mom and sisters, if you do a semi-choreographed number, I bet it will be a big hit!

I was also going to advise skipping the dance altogether; if it's going to upset you that your dad isn't there you should probably remind yourself of it as little as possible.  BTW, have you thought of sending your dad a STD or an invite?  Maybe he'd like to know his daughter's getting married(?)

Dlutz828

I brought the idea up to my sisters and they really liked the idea too... I think we are going to do that.  My Dad has been told several times when the wedding day is.  For him to be part of the wedding he needs to enter AA and get help... he hasn't done either. 

526SadieSadie

I hope my suggestion didn't offend you in any way, I said it with genuine intentions.  If your dad doesn't care enough about himself to get better, it's his loss, he's missing out on a great daughter

Dlutz828

There was no offense at all... I was a little vague on details lol.  I agree it is always going to be his loss.  I am very lucky, I have all the love and support I could ever want from my other family.  Thanks for your thoughts :-)

Ellie*xo

i know this is late in replying.. but if you don't want any of your uncles to feel left out, you can consider taking turns dancing with all of them.  my friend's father had passed away. she has 3 brothers, the eldest walked her down the aisle and she danced with the 3 of them - taking turns.  if your uncles have stepped in and have taken "father" roles with you, i think it would be a nice gesture to include them in that way.  either way.. do what makes you feel comfortable and happy.. it's your day!