Name Change Silliness

Kaylakuma

So My fiance and I do not plan on changing our last names. When we are both done university our titles will both be Dr. It wont be an issue then but what title do I use beforehand? I am a few years behind on the whole uni thing despite being older than him and when he is Dr. I will be something... Do I use Mrs. to denote I am married or just keep using Miss?

Kidlet 26

You could just use Ms.  Although, Mrs. is perfectly acceptable.  Are you planning on keeping your name for social purposes as well or just progessional?  If you plan on using his name socially you could definitely use Mrs. Husbands Name.  I know several professional women who use Mrs. Maiden Name though.  Either way, up to you. 

MyNameIsNot

You'll be Dr. and Ms.  Mrs. isn't used if you don't change your name.  

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_name-change-silliness?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:bf0fd39e-f760-4052-a64d-951aadf82ccfPost:4025d85d-8e7d-4e53-a286-a02152091d05">Re: Name Change Silliness</a>:
[QUOTE]You'll be Dr. and Ms.  Mrs. isn't used if you don't change your name.  
Posted by MyNameIsNot[/QUOTE]

That is what I thought, too. Mrs. is reserved for those who are married but changed their name to their husband's last.

Kaylakuma

Alright! Good to know. I honestly had no idea. I'm keeping my name because it's my name and in my spiritual tradition there's a lot of focus putting on being proud of your family, name included. I also have a great attachment to names and have a hard time with changes so I'd rather keep my own.

jeanna85

agree with PPs, if you keep your last name but use "mrs.", it will sound like you're married to your dad :P

artbyallie

Good idea to keep the name, btw, since you'll both be Dr... there are two professors at a college I went to that are both Dr. HisLastName and they have the same first initial as well. We tend to refer to her as Mrs. Dr. Lastname or Dr. Mrs. Lastname to differentiate.

2dBride

The old tradition was that if you kept your own name, you were "Miss" even if married.  When I was young, I was an attorney at a law firm with a receptionist who actually remembered the rule, and called me Miss [my last name].  However, when I started being visibly pregnant, she apparently decided that was scandalous, and switched to Mrs.

Seriously, Ms. was invented for a reason--to make it so you don't have to know a woman's entire marital history and her husband's first and last name even to address her.

MissCal11

So what will you ask your officiant to introduce you?

My fiance and I are both Dr's and I am not changing my name, so I think we will ask her to introduce us as husband and wife.

aerinpegadrak

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_name-change-silliness?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:bf0fd39e-f760-4052-a64d-951aadf82ccfPost:dfe79163-1a32-4595-8117-462d1f38ba72">Re: Name Change Silliness</a>:
[QUOTE]In my opinion I think women should change their last names to thier husbands. The point of getting married is the combining of two people into one; to create a new family. Plus, I think if people don't want to change their last names, then it gets really confusing and what last name would the children get?
Posted by ashleywhitsett[/QUOTE]
It's a personal decision, and lots of women keep their names for lots of reasons.  This post is extremely judgmental and small-minded.

MyNameIsNot

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_name-change-silliness?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:bf0fd39e-f760-4052-a64d-951aadf82ccfPost:7595ab4d-e7f6-4f7d-ba6f-671c15a46450">Re: Name Change Silliness</a>:
[QUOTE]Well I did say in my opinion and I do agree that it is a personal decision, but I would never do it.
Posted by ashleywhitsett[/QUOTE]

<div>I think that women who do change their names do so because they are not independent human beings, and need to show the world that they are owned by a man, because they get their identity from their marital status.</div><div>
</div><div>Not really, but see how stupid and judgmental you sound saying something like that?  It is a personal decision, and it is none of your business what other people choose to do with their names or why.  Who are you to think that you know better than anyone else about how they should run their lives?  </div>

aerinpegadrak

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_name-change-silliness?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:bf0fd39e-f760-4052-a64d-951aadf82ccfPost:7595ab4d-e7f6-4f7d-ba6f-671c15a46450">Re: Name Change Silliness</a>:
[QUOTE]Well I did say in my opinion and I do agree that it is a personal decision, but I would never do it.
Posted by ashleywhitsett[/QUOTE]
And my opinion is that you're judgmental and small-minded.  Sorry, saying "It's just my opinion" isn't a blanket defense for stupidity.  It can be my opinion that the sun revolves around the earth, but that doesn't make it any more of a defensible position.

MyNameIsNot

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_name-change-silliness?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:bf0fd39e-f760-4052-a64d-951aadf82ccfPost:70ce58e6-b8e6-498f-9e6a-939103782cce">Re: Name Change Silliness</a>:
[QUOTE]Ok for one thing I didn't attack anyone by posting what I said because that's how I feel and I directed it at no one! And two why are y'all attacking me? Isn't it sad that y'all have to sit here and say how stupid and judgemental I am, but who is judging someone. You contradict yourself by saying it's a personal decision to change your last name, but because I want to change my last name, it's stupid. It's the exact opposite from what I said except I was a lady and didn't attack anyone. But I am not going to let anyone run me over! So quit being narrow minded by saying that women are not independent for changing their last names! I'm not changing my last name for a status, I am changing it because I will honor my new husband and the new family we will be creating. Remember ladies, it's a personal decision (from y'alls exact words) and I choose to change my last name!
Posted by ashleywhitsett[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>You clearly have problems with reading comprehension.  My comments about women being stupid for changing their name was tongue in cheek, and meant to show you exactly how judgmental and small minded you sound.  Thus the "<em>Not really, but do you see..</em>." following.  </div><div>
</div><div>Perhaps you should spend a little less time focusing on judging other people's decisions and spend that time learning to accept that you don't know what is best for other people. </div><div>
</div><div>Oh, and wondering into a dead post for the sole purpose of telling someone that you think the way they are running their life is wrong is not how a lady behaves.  Stop kidding yourself that you are here for any other reason than to put people down for their decisions.  </div>