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Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

Shower Guests

I need help with a shower question.  I thought bridal showers are for close friends and family but my future MIL recently told me every female who is invited to the wedding should be invited to the shower.  We are inviting 300 to the wedding so she said I need to plan for 150 at the shower.  She offered to throw the shower for everyone, but my mom and aunt also offered to throw a shower for just our close family and friends (about 35 people).  I feel like it's rude to have a 150 person shower, where people will sit for 2 hours and watch me open gifts.  I would like to have the chance to talk to everyone there and let them know how much I appreciate them coming and I think that would be hard to do with 150 people.  Plus, I feel like it's rude to invite out of town guests who I know will not come to the shower.  I do not want them to feel like they are obligated to send a shower gift.  I told my future MIL all of this and she thinks I'm being ridiculous.  We talked about having 2 showers but my future MIL doesn't like that idea.  My mom and aunt agree with me.  Who is right?

Re: Shower Guests

  • I am planning on two showers but thats because I am having one in Fort Wayne where the wedding is and one in Indianapolis where we live... most of the women coming to the wedding are close to me that I knew I needed to have two showers so that some of the women could celebrate with me and not drive four hours twice! Luckily I have two BM's in fort wayne that will host that one and two BM's in indy that will host that one... but no I am not inviting every female it just seems like it... However I have been to my share of weddings where I was not invited to the shower and for a couple of them even my FI thought it was weird. Those however were for mutual friends of ours getting married and we knew both bride and groom quite well!
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