Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

Groom and Bride See Each Other Before the Ceremony?

OK, So I have been battling with myself on this issue for awhile. I LOVE the traditional idea of FI not seeing me until I walk down the aisle. However, our ceremony and reception venue is the same place, meaning there is going to be about an hour of turnover time between the two so the reception can be setup and we can take pics.

I've seen some cute photos taken before the ceremony where the groom has a blindfold and the bride comes and unties the blindfold and then he sees her in the dress. Then the moment is captured for sure and some couple pictures can be taken.

What are your thoughts?
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Re: Groom and Bride See Each Other Before the Ceremony?

  • We didn't see each other until the ceremony, because my husband really wanted his first look at me to be as I walked down the aisle. I didnt't really care either way, but it meant a lot to him, so that's what we did. We did separate photos before the wedding (me with the bridesmaids and him with the groomsmen) at the venue, then did pics with the whole bridal party and just us during cocktail hour. If you don't do a "first look" then I definitely recommend you do separate photos before the ceremony. But, if you and your fiancé want to do a first look, then go for it! It won't invalidate your marriage or anything:-)
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  • I don't understand how the ceremony and reception being in the same place affect whether or not the two of you see one another beforehand?  I am confused here.

    One of my fave pics that I have seen is where the bride and groom both stand at a corner of a building, without seeing each other of course, and hold hands around the corner of the building while looking "towards" one another.

    You definitely want to wait until the ceremony to see one another IMO....that is one of THE best moments to experience!  :)

     

  • This question is asked a lot. Just do a forum search for 'first look' to get opinions. It really seems to vary on the person. We also didn't have a lot of time in between, so at the last minute we decided to do the first look & all of our photos before the ceremony. It was so much more relaxed after & took absolutely nothing away from that moment they opened the church doors. In fact, since I got most of my crying done already, I was in a lot better shape for the ceremony. 

    I haven't seen anyone who did a first look regret it, but that doesn't mean it's right for you.
  • gundy21gundy21 member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited July 2012
    We had our ceremony and reception at the same place.  We did first look photos and it was the best decision we could have made.  The emotion captured in those pictures was amazing and we never would have had that private moment if we didn't have the first look pics.  I know both of us would have held back our emotions if we were in front of everyone instead of just the two of us.
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  • We are planning a first look and doing a majority of pictures beforehard. It just works out better, timing wise and I think it will be nice to see him beforehand.
  • Our ceremony and reception were in the same place. We did first look photos and I don't regret it at all. One of my favorite moments of the entire day was actually riding to our ceremony together in our party bus. It was relaxing and a lot of fun. It didn't take anything away from walking down the aisle.
     
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  • aragx6aragx6 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited July 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_groom-and-bride-see-each-other-before-the-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:d0ecc9ee-81bb-4c46-acac-ac65a6195381Post:48071eb4-cd16-463d-ac5f-f41001272222">Re: Groom and Bride See Each Other Before the Ceremony?</a>:
    [QUOTE]We are planning a first look and doing a majority of pictures beforehard. It just works out better, timing wise and I think it will be nice to see him beforehand.
    Posted by amymaysa[/QUOTE]

    Ditto. I'm hoping it will also help keep me from straight up ugly crying during the ceremony. But I still kind of doubt it.

    I'm also confused about the hour-long gap -- what will your guests do during this time?
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  • During the hour it will be a "Cocktail" hour, but with some appetizers. My FI doesn't want the "reception" to be setup as the ceremony seating. That definitely would have been easier, but he doesn't want it that way. :-) Everything is in my church sanctuary. I know we will be able to make it work and flow well, but just trying to figure out what will be best.

    Thanks so much for all of the input! And if anyone else comes in on this, don't hesitate to comment!
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  • We aren't going to see each other ahead of time.  I feel strongly about that.  We have a cocktail hour so any pics with FI and I together with the wedding party will be taken then.  The wedding party is having a private cocktail hour in a separate room so we will be able to get it done then.
  • Our ceremony and reception were in the same venue, so we did a First Look and all our bridal party / parent pictures ahead of time. I loved being able to spend the day with my DH. 
  • H and I got ready together and walked down the aisle together. We were both happy with our decision and he said the moment wasn't any less special when he saw me in my dress for the first time. We both agree that the whole giving the bride away/not seeing each other before the wedding is pretty silly...but the same could be said for most wedding traditions. Pick what you want to do and go with it.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_groom-and-bride-see-each-other-before-the-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:d0ecc9ee-81bb-4c46-acac-ac65a6195381Post:e9fd3406-d812-4030-8a66-503bdc768de9">Re:Groom and Bride See Each Other Before the Ceremony?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Groom and Bride See Each Other Before the Ceremony?:. But WHY doesn't he want it that way? I'd need a pretty darn good reason to make my guests move to another room to sit and eat appetizers for an hour. You are at least making sure that the cocktail area has enough seats for everyone and not making your guests stand for an hour, right?
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    Correct, it will be in the Children's Church Auditorium, so there will be plenty of space/seats for the guests.
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  • We're doing a first look, even though it took some time for FI to come around to it. My church has pretty strict photography rules, so there can be no pictures from when I go up the aisle until we're coming back down it together. If we didn't do a first look I feel like we'd miss out on pictures that capture the emotion involved. Plus, I'd like to get a lot of pictures done beforehand. 
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  • We did the "first look" before the ceremony. I would definitely recommend it! It alleviated a lot of stress and nerves and allowed us to get lots of pictures done before the wedding and more time to socialize with guests after. I can't imagine if I'd had to hide in a back room once H had arrived.
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  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker

    If you want the pre-wedding photos taken, go for it.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_groom-and-bride-see-each-other-before-the-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:d0ecc9ee-81bb-4c46-acac-ac65a6195381Post:e9fd3406-d812-4030-8a66-503bdc768de9">Re:Groom and Bride See Each Other Before the Ceremony?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Groom and Bride See Each Other Before the Ceremony?:. But WHY doesn't he want it that way? I'd need a pretty darn good reason to make my guests move to another room to sit and eat appetizers for an hour. You are at least making sure that the cocktail area has enough seats for everyone and not making your guests stand for an hour, right?
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    I've been to a wedding where the room was set up for the reception and you sat at the tables for the ceremony.  It was very weird.  Couldn't even see the couple from where we were sitting. 

    I think if the room is set up for ceremony and the guests are brought in to another room for a proper cocktail hour after the ceremony (and while the room is being converted over for a reception), it should work fine. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_groom-and-bride-see-each-other-before-the-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:d0ecc9ee-81bb-4c46-acac-ac65a6195381Post:aacbc14f-be53-4a85-8689-c32c7c51a309">Re: Groom and Bride See Each Other Before the Ceremony?</a>:
    [QUOTE]We did the "first look" before the ceremony. I would definitely recommend it! It alleviated a lot of stress and nerves and allowed us to get lots of pictures done before the wedding and more time to socialize with guests after. I can't imagine if I'd had to hide in a back room once H had arrived.
    Posted by MiksChick23[/QUOTE]

    I feel the same here, we are planning to have a "first look" and do pictures before the ceremony not only because I know I WILL cry when we see each other for the first time but also because I'm hoping it will settle nerves & stress about the whole day. I'm a person who laughs a lot in photos so by the time we're done with our pictures & we're walking down the aisle I should be all loose and ready to go! :)
  • We're not doing the first look, I've seen some SUPER cute pics and heard great things about it taking a lot of the pressure off, but I think it also depends on what time of day the wedding is and if you can squeeze it in.  Ours is a bit earlier in the day and I don't think we'll really have time for it, otherwise I'd entertain the thought, but we're both on the same page of waiting until I walk down the aisle :)  That's one picture I've told my photographer I really want, the look on HIS face when he sees me.  Everyone will see my expression, not many people capture the groom's reaction :)  I took the sweetest pic at a coworker's wedding of her soon to be hubby wiping away a tear, almost nobody else saw it :*)
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