Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

Getting married on your birthday....hmmm?

Finally getting married after 5 and half years of dating the love of my life!!! Super excited but now that's it time to pick a wedding date, I immediately picked my birthdate for next year. But now I'm  not sure if getting married on my birthday is a good a idea.  I just thought, hey my birthday falls on a saturday in 2011 and since I got engaged 5 days before my b-day I thought, why not..but now I'm kinda in the middle. What should I do? Should I pick a different date? Or just go with my gut feeling?

Re: Getting married on your birthday....hmmm?

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    I wouldn't do it either.  I'm selfish when it comes to my birthday and I don't like sharing other events with it! Cool  The day I was born is special enough as it is! But that's just me...If it doesn't bother you then go for it.
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    You can look into doing it the week before. My wedding is taking place 5 days before my birthday and I'm very excited to be celebrating my birthday on my honeymoon and having a week long celebration for my anniversary/birthday in the future.  If birthdays are a big deal to you, than don't do it, I would have been open to it, but I didn't like the date for other reasons.  Beside my current count down is till my wedding 1 year 3 days, not my bday which is in 8.

    (wedding date in profile is not correct, don't know how to change it)
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    Or you could think of it as the best present ever, it's up to you.
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    Pick a different date honey! I am sooooo selfish when it comes to my birthday as well! But it is completely up to you.

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    I am getting married a day before my birthday.  Unfortunately, my birthday falls on a sunday not a sat, so we're doing it the day before. 

    However, I have a different reason than it being my birthday.  I share my birthday with my Grandmother and she and my grandfather who passed away a few years ago were married on her birthday. 

    I would have loved to share their anniversary, and while I know I won't because it's not the date, my grandma understands the thought and the love behind the gesture. 

    I don't mind it being a day before my birthday.  I figure every year we just get to do a wicked celebration!!  ;)
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    The way DH and I view it is: his birthday is all about him, my birthday is all about me, and our anniversary is all about "us".

    Personally, I wouldn't have given up my "all about me" day while he got to keep his, lol

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    My parents got married on my dad's birthday.  It wasn't necessarily a matter of choice, it just happened to be the only day the church was available.  It hasn't seemed to be that big of a deal for him for the last 30+ years, but he's never been big into celebrating his birthday.  It's really up to you. 
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    My grandparents got married on my grandmothers birthday, and it has not been a problem for the 60 years they have been together.
    It is definitely a choice you have to make. If like PP have said birthdays are a big thing in your family or to you then, maybe its not a great idea. But another PP said think of it as the best gift ever, and you can go with that too.
    Either way whatever you decide will be the right decision.
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    I would say that is totally up to you! My Fiance and I are getting married on OUR Birthday and we think it's sweet. I say this way, you can have a double celebration. Have both a wedding cake and a birthday cake! You can get two gifts from him every year and better yet, he can NEVER say, I FORGOT your birthday!! :)
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    That would be a big mistake in my case.  My fiance has a family that celebrates birthdays together every year.  No way would I want to share him with his family on the day that is about us.  I would feel I got shafted if I had to spend our anniversary with his family only recognizing his birthday and not our anniversary EVERY year.  And it's kind of mean to expect him to get you something extra special for your anniversary because it's also your birthday.  That puts a lot of pressure on him year after year.
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    My parents got married the day after my dad's birthday. I don't' know how they picked the date (I'll have to ask my mom, I'm curious now!) but they're not big out to dinner anniversary celebration people, and we really celebrate birthdays with immediate family only. But it depends on when you want to get married. I mean, I myself would want to keep some distance from my birthday. H's bday is April 1 and mine is tomorrow, and we absolutely wanted a summer wedding, so it was easy to bypass our birthdays. And we were looking at August 7 because it was kind of a midpoint between our birthdays, but we went with August 14 so I could have a Friday the 13th rehearsal dinner! I was born on Friday the 13th, 13 has been my lucky number and a lot of things through my life fell on the 13th, so we wanted to keep a good, positive things going on on the 13ths!

    What does your FI think? He should definitely have some say in when the wedding is.  H & I absolutely chose the date TOGETHER. His brothers both got married on the same date, several years apart. And we DID look at the calendar just to see where it fell, but honestly I think I would have shot that down because I really would want our anniversary to be separate & special. Talk to your FI and see what he thinks.

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    I got engaged on my birthday. and had planned on getting married on my birthday but then my grandma brought up the fact if the marriage turned bad it would ruin my birthday for life. so not really a good idea
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    My FI's birthday is our dating anniversary and we are getting married the day before it.  We had a long talk about it and the final decision was up to him.  He isn't a big birthday guy anyway and so he decided it was fine.  He is actually excited about it.  A lot of people have brought it up like it's a bad thing but for him/us it isn't a big deal.  You need to decided how YOU and your FI feel about it as it really only affects the two of you.   Good luck deciding!
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    My two cents:

    We picked a date that wasn't around either of our birthdays or a celebration holiday so that we would have time that was just for the two of us. Also, it gives you another day on the calendar to mark as special!!
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    My mom's first piece of advice about wedding planning was to not get married on my birthday...I've heard it for years! 

    She says she would rather have a "her" day and an "us" day. She doesn't like it being the same. She feels that getting married shouldn't cancel out the little "her" time she gets...which sounds selfish, but who wouldn't want to get spoiled on their birthday AND their anniversary! 

    We're getting married about 3 weeks after Christmas...too close for my taste, but the best we can do due to my grad school schedule. 
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    rebeccamatrebeccamat member
    First Comment
    edited December 2010
    I don't think I'd want to be married on my birthday, although we're doing it the same month.  My birthday is beginning of June, wedding is the 25th.  My fiancé's birthday is the beginning of December and Christmas the end, so we'll have two months of the year, evenly spaced out, with both a birthday and a joint gift giving day. *g*
    You may very well be well-bred, Lots of etiquette in your head - But there's always some special case, Time or place to forget etiquette.
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