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Female friends/ MOH duties

Hi, I get married next fall. I am from a military family and have moved all my life. My friends are all over the country and so is my family- including 3 of my BMs. (hehe bm)

I dont have a maid of honor- i have almost never had best female friends.... in fact my last two bf have been my male bosses. The one bm that lives here has been explicit about never wanting to be a MOH again. She does not want the duties. My mother, bless her heart, is in another state and horribly irresponsible anyway. To boot im budget and diy.

HELP ME. Theres no one to host anything but me and him. I have aqaintances from dance class but havent been going in the last 2 months because of knee issues. Who is gonna do the showers etc?

And to add insult to injury my FI has 2 wonderful sisters whom have expressed interest in helping but have kids/ crazy jobs ( are much older than us) and want to do things completely on their schedule. For instance, our parents wont meet at the engagement party one of them offered to host till spring because shes busy. No one to shop with, or craft with.... at least not until the last minute.

BTW i dont want 'guy' parties or a male MOH- i want g/fs. I want girl bonding. :(
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