Rehearsal dinner??

transcriber87

Ok, this could be a potentially long confusing story...I keep hearing and reading about rehearsal dinners and that  the grooms parents pay for it.  They are not paying for anything, my mother is paying for everything except for my fiances tux rental and she already hinted to him that he needs to find an officiant to do the wedding.  I don't think that is too much to ask since she is paying close to 5000 for everything else.  My mom is a coworker and friend to my fiance's brothers wife and when they got married 5 years ago, there was a party of about 45 at the rehearsal dinner...when it came time to pay the bill, his parents got up and left and they had to pay for the rehearsal dinner...so my question is, is it that big of a deal that we wouldn't have a rehearsal dinner? My mom is my maid of honor and I have 2 bridesmaids who are single moms and after the rehearsal, maybe inviting everyone back to our house for maybe a pizza party and we could hand them our gifts for being in the wedding? SO many people are insisting you HAVE to have a rehearsal dinner but given our circumstances, I think a pizza party at our house afterwards would work? Opinions anyone?

littleluckypenny

If you have a rehearsal, you need to host a rehearsal dinner.  It doesn't have to be fancy, but you need to feed these people.  You and your FI are the ones getting married, therefore you are responsible for all expenses.  If anyone OFFERS, you can accept or decline the offer.

Remember that SOs require an invitation to the dinner.

aragx6

A party at your house with pizza is a rehearsal dinner.

You must host something for anyone who had to be at the rehearsal and their significant others if applicable. As long as you do that -- no matter how casual what you host is -- you're totally fine.

rlavach

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_rehearsal-dinner-8?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:f2f84428-2088-47ed-8276-726d2cfa1ccaPost:77231c13-1f63-4811-8252-0a9456114538">Re: Rehearsal dinner??</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>A party at your house with pizza is a rehearsal dinner.</strong> You must host something for anyone who had to be at the rehearsal and their significant others if applicable. As long as you do that -- no matter how casual what you host is -- you're totally fine.
Posted by aragx6[/QUOTE]
That's exactly what I was going to write. OP, if people are trying to pressure you info having a big formal RD, then don't listen. Unless they're paying, they have no say. My FI's parents paid for nothing in our wedding. We decided to have the rehearsal dinner at our new aprartment right before the rehearsal (since that was at 9:45pm). I cooked some food, my mom volunteered to cook some & I ordered 1 tray of chicken marsala from a local Italian place. We had <15 people total. It was perfect for us & WAY cheaper than going to a restaurant.

RebeccaB88

If you have a simple ceremony, you can skip having a rehearsal, and not need a rehearsal dinner.

Otherwise, pizza and beer at your place is a perfectly acceptable rehearsal dinner. 

Just remember that husbands/wives/SOs of your bridal party need to be included.