thoughts on flower girl issue

EBONYROBERT

hello,

I dont have a flower girl for my wedding. I do have a daughter who is 11 yrs old. She is playing the role of junior bridesmaid, the dress she is going to wear has pockets so, my question is do you think it would be ok to have her throw petals from out of the pockets? or would that just label her as a flower girl?

kellya01

I think if she's throwing out petals, as a guest, I'd consider her a flower girl.  If she's okay with doing that, it should be fine, but I'd let her decide whether she will be a flower girl or a junior bridesmaid.  Kids in pre-teens sometimes feel overly childish if they have a role that they perceive as childish, but some kids at that age are totally okay with it too.  What if you have ALL of the BM's throw out some petals as they come down the aisle?  Then, the 11-yr-old won't necessarily look like a "flower girl" if she's not comfortable with that title.  

EBONYROBERT

wow never thought of that, thats a great idea! Thanks

Magdala9

A child thowing anything from her pockets will look like a tantrum.  She is too important to put in an awkward position.   Give her a beautiful bouquet and treat her with the importance she deserves.

midgetthemighty

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_thoughts-flower-girl-issue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:f8c45361-6e34-4721-9cff-2c71764ce640Post:3e5b92f4-9acb-4310-857a-9b8359bf0217">Re: thoughts on flower girl issue</a>:
[QUOTE]A child thowing anything from her pockets will look like a tantrum.  She is too important to put in an awkward position.   Give her a beautiful bouquet and treat her with the importance she deserves.
Posted by Magdala9[/QUOTE]

I have to say I agree. As a guest, I would be very confused.

kristeno90

I agree that having anything throw from pockets would be tacky. If you want a flower girl give her a basket if not give her a bouquet like the rest of the girls.

jerseydevil

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_thoughts-flower-girl-issue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:f8c45361-6e34-4721-9cff-2c71764ce640Post:efda9a5b-7937-4dac-bcae-1ccbffe4350d">Re: thoughts on flower girl issue</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree that having anything throw from pockets would be tacky. If you want a flower girl give her a basket if not give her a bouquet like the rest of the girls.
Posted by kristeno90[/QUOTE]

I agree with this. Ask her what she wants to do. At 11, I'm sure she would appreciate being treated more like an adult by having a bouquet, but every one is different. Talk to her about what she wants.

Andrea.Matillano

I personally would stick with keeping her as a junior bridesmaid. I think that she would enjoy that more.

trix1223

Yeah, I think pulling stuff out of her pockets and then throwing it would just be odd.  Make her a BM.  Leave out the "junior" part, unless you're calling all of the other BMs "Senior Bridesmaids".

geojam224

I have an awkward flower girl situation, too.  I just have to say that you are not forced to follow any old traditions, especially if they are not offensive to anybody.  If she wants to thorw petals, let her throw petals.  You don't HAVE to have a flower girl at your wedding at all.  If I were you, I would let her be a junior bridesmaid with a bouquet and list her in the program as a junior bridesmaid, unless she really wants to be a flower girl (which it seems like every girl wants to be a flower girl, so I can't imagine her being offended by that).  But, it's completely up to you, and don't feel pressure from people claiming anything will look "stupid."  It isn't anyone else's decision.  Good luck!

KristieA13

I think that it might be confusing. But do what YOU want! It's YOUR wedding! If that is what makes you happy, then go for it!