Do Ushers pay for couples shower?

Shelley10210

More Couple's Shower drama!!! So our entire bridal party is throwing us a couple's shower. Are the ushers included with paying for the event? My Mother in law says no. I have no idea.

tidetravel

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_ushers-pay-couples-shower?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:02012896-c20a-4b91-98bc-640c25356f61Post:a33ddf1b-be72-4b0f-912b-80412de72dd6">Do Ushers pay for couples shower?</a>:
[QUOTE]More Couple's Shower drama!!! So our entire bridal party is throwing us a couple's shower. Are the ushers included with paying for the event? My Mother in law says no. I have no idea.
Posted by Shelley10210[/QUOTE]
Anyone but the couple can host a pre-wedding party, and no one is required to.  If they offer to help host/pay, then they can, but they (nor anyone else in your WP)  are not required to.

mbcdefg

If you're the guest of honor, then the planning and payment for the shower is none of your business anyway.

Let them work it out amongst themselves, and be grateful for whatever you may receive. You should have ZERO say in who pays for it.

bablingbrooke

Who pays for the shower is none of your business.  But since you asked, no.  Whoever hosts the shower pays for it.

banana468

It's up to those throwing the party to figure out who pays for it.  You and your FI should stay out of it.

No one should be approached though and told, "Your share is $X." 

gottahavashorti

That is up to them and you should not be involved.

baystateapple

As someone who has had a member of the bridal party come to me and say "Cough up $X for the shower", I can definitely say your WP won't thank you or whoever is hosting the shower if they aren't ASKED what they can afford to contribute (if they even WANT to contribute). 

megandjay

I would say no, ushers shouldn't be included.

If your BP gets together (without you) and decides to throw the party, then that is up to them. They can decide who/how much. But I would try to steer them away from asking ushers, possibly that was their idea to defray the costs? But really, it should be whomever is hosting it, as PPs said.

Although if I thought my BP was reaching out to other people for $, I might try to drop a hint against it (I know, the bride should not be involved in any planning, but you also don't want your BP to drag the ushers into it).

CTGirl30

Luckily this is something you don't need to get involved in, as you should have no part in who is organizing a shower for you or how they're paying for it. That's up to those folks to determine amongst themselves.

Shelley10210

Thank you for your comments. A lot of people keep saying I should not be involved. Well, I totally agree. My BP has but me and my fiance in the middle constantly. We didnt want to be involved.