Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....

OBX2011

Ummmm yea so I have a real good one for you ladies....the FI had a few buddies over last night for cornhole & beers and well, as the night progressed so did the level of intoxication.  So at one point, without even discussing this with me, the FI decides to ask his buddy to be in our WP.  WTF??  I was so pissed I was spiting nails.  When we first got engaged, he was happy go lucky and asked 4 friends without even talking to me about it.  I'm fine with his choices but never wanted a large WP to begin with, but I dealt with it.  I made it very clear that communication is key in planning our wedding and he promised not to make any rash decisions until we have agreed.  Well, all that shiit went right out the window apparently. 

I love his 5th dearly and would love for him to be up there (even though I still don't want a large party but will deal) but he didn't even know if he was going to be able to make it as a guest b/c "he is in a different place in his life right now" and wants to pack up his truck and drive across the country.  The FI insisted that he be part of the WP and that "he will be there, without a doubt"  So now I have to fix this mess.  I am more than happy for him to share in this with us but I could read him like a book last night and he just seemed so embarrassed and uncomfortable that he was put on the spot.  So I will call today and let him know we would love to have him and that I could tell that he was uncomfortable and that neither of us want him to feel pressured into this and that we are comfortable with whatever he decides.  The FI will be getting an extreme lesson in tact tonight. 

He brought me breakfast this morning....which he never does since he leaves at 7am and I don't leave until 9:15 so I know that he knows that he is in big trouble.

Ohhhh and to top it off, I got to work this morning to be told that I was doing an internet commercial in 30 minutes and to get ready.  Whaaaattttt????  I was nervous at first but nailed it on the 3rd take so I'm kinda stoked about my "camera moment"  I think I have found my new calling, lol.

mbcdefg

I don't really see the big deal with the groomsman thing, personally. Unless I'm missing an important backstory.

The Internet thing would piss me off. I hate having short notice for things that depend on my appearance/preparation.

HappinessByTheKilowatt

You don't need to call his friend. He needs to call his friend. Not your business.

Viczaesar

His wedding party is his business.  You choose your party, he chooses his.  I don't think you should be interfering. 

OBX2011

Ohhh don't get me wrong, I love his 5th dearly and am more than happy for him to be a part of this.

I was just thrown for a loop that we decided our WP 4 months ago and he just now wanted to ask his 5th without giving me a heads up that he was doing so.  It's the lack of communication that really irked me.

I kind of feel embarassed for the 5th in a way b/c he knew that our WP was chosen and I can't help but wonder if he feels uncomfortable that he was asked so late in the game.

FutureJilliannD

I feel like there is something I am missing too, since I can't see why you are that mad either. Plus, if you call him and be like "oh I could tell you were uncomfortable and you don't need to be in the WP" is going to look like you trying to back out of having him.

midgetthemighty

I don't see the big deal either honestly. You sound like you like the "extra" groomsman just fine, so why make a big deal out of it?

DNAtime

Yea, if its not too late DON'T call the GM.  This really isn't any of your business. I would butt out.

I don't think lack of communication is an issue here, he doesn't need your permission. Lack of communication would be not telling you until the rehearsal. Obviously you found out right away.

OBX2011

Yes I understand that my choices are mine and his choices are his and that is completely fine.  It's just that our WP had been decided over 4 months ago and he did this without even giving me a heads up.  I'm sure anyone would be somewhat shocked that such a decision was made without speaking about it first.

No, I am definitely not calling to say that I could see you were uncomfortable so you are not needed.  I would and could never do that to someone.  I'm saying that he was uncomfortable and put on the spot b/c he knew the FI had a few too many and didn't know how to respond and felt pressured into this and he shouldn't feel that way at all. 

He had already mentioned that he didn't even know if he was going to be there as a guest since he may be in CA or OR or Utah for all he knows and that he may not be able to attend, even as a guest, due to financial reasons.  Then what seemed to be a last ditch effort, the FI asked him to be in the WP alsmost in a way to ensure that he would in fact be there.

I am more than happy to for him to be there.  I'm more irked that the FI didn't have the respect to at least talk to me about this before making such a rash decision....which was clearly influenced by alcohol.  I'm simply venting over the FI...not that the 5th has been added.

StacyJenniges

I can understand your frustration, my FI actually asked a few of his GM before he even asked me to marry him!  Hahaha.  I wasnt' upset I was glad he was excited but then stressed because we didn't talk about how many (we are having 7!)

But the asking a groomsman late in the game after you had decided on 4 is something to be a bit ticked off about, in my opinion.  Since your wedding is 4 months away you are probably already getting this together with the WP so adding another groomsman to me would mean I have to add another bridesmaid.  (I know I know you don't have to be even but I WANT to be even)  I do agree that it is a lack of communication even though you knew it right away, he's making a decision without consulting you.    YOu do have a right to be upset, you and your fiance cann't be planning your wedding without talking to eachother it would be a circus.

Now that I let you know that you aren't the only one who would think this way I'll give you my advise.  I would talk to your FI before talking to the GM let him know your feelings and let him know that you want to make sure his friend didn't feel bullied into this.

Good luck.

hlq2011

Really, no matter what you're planning to say to him, it's not your place.  Your FI asked him to be a GM; it's up to your FI to call and say, hey, sorry for putting you on the spot.  It's not up to you.

It's his side of the wedding party, and his to handle.  Not yours.

But I do understand your frustration, and it would bug me too.  But you really need to stay out of it.

OBX2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:f9d6ed66-014a-44de-af45-c225ea0a8fa0">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]I can understand your frustration, my FI actually asked a few of his GM before he even asked me to marry him!  Hahaha.  I wasnt' upset I was glad he was excited but then stressed because we didn't talk about how many (we are having 7!) But the asking a groomsman late in the game after you had decided on 4 is something to be a bit ticked off about, in my opinion.  Since your wedding is 4 months away you are probably already getting this together with the WP so adding another groomsman to me would mean I have to add another bridesmaid.  (I know I know you don't have to be even but I WANT to be even)  I do agree that it is a lack of communication even though you knew it right away, he's making a decision without consulting you.    YOu do have a right to be upset, you and your fiance cann't be planning your wedding without talking to eachother it would be a circus. Now that I let you know that you aren't the only one who would think this way I'll give you my advise.  I would talk to your FI before talking to the GM let him know your feelings and let him know that you want to make sure his friend didn't feel bullied into this. Good luck.
Posted by StacyJenniges[/QUOTE]

Exactly!  It was the "so late in the game" thing and the strong lack of communication that got to me.  He can have whomever he wants on his side, as long as it makes him happy then so be it.  I would have just appreciated a "hey btw, I know we have decided the WP but I have really thought about it and I really want "5th" to be in our WP so I'm going to ask him"  That's all I was getting at.

I agree, I need to stay out of this one and that he should make sure all is kosher with his 5th and that he didn't feel pressured into this.

P.S.  I know the WP can be un-even but I have a weird thing about odd numbers anyways....I will have to get over myself, lol.

LisaChris2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:0140bb11-f724-4c9d-a87f-c07677788218">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent..... : Exactly!  It was the "so late in the game" thing and the strong lack of communication that got to me.  He can have whomever he wants on his side, as long as it makes him happy then so be it.  <strong>I would have just appreciated a "hey btw, I know we have decided the WP but I have really thought about it and I really want "5th" to be in our WP so I'm going to ask him</strong>"  That's all I was getting at. I agree, I need to stay out of this one and that he should make sure all is kosher with his 5th and that he didn't feel pressured into this. P.S.  I know the WP can be un-even but I have a weird thing about odd numbers anyways....I will have to get over myself, lol.
Posted by OBX2011[/QUOTE]

But why do you need this?  Are you the type that dislikes sudden change, good or bad? If so, I can see your fustration or annoyance.  But your FI adding a 5th is not a negative thing, and I wouldn't teach him a "lesson" about it, as you said in your original post.  He's a grown adult, he's his own man.  I would let it be.

OBX2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:e7878b56-35b0-4bab-a1fe-3c459815d5d2">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent..... : But why do you need this?  Are you the type that dislikes sudden change, good or bad? If so, I can see your fustration or annoyance.  But your FI adding a 5th is not a negative thing, and I wouldn't teach him a "lesson" about it, as you said in your original post.  He's a grown adult, he's his own man.  I would let it be.
Posted by LisaChris2011[/QUOTE]

I dont' think asking for a heads up is unreasonable, especially when planning our wedding. 

Can anyone honestly tell me that they wouldn't be flustered/upset/shocked (choose any) if their FI added someone after 4 months of planning without even so much saying anything about it to you?  Like you get home from work and the FI says "I've added a 5th btw"  It's not the adding part, it's the lack of communication part. 

Adding the 5th isn't the problem here....just how he went about it.  This should've been a conversation he had with the 5th while A) not drinking and B) not in the presence of myself or our best man.  What if he would have had to say no?  Then he would have been completely embarassed....that is where the whole tact thing comes in.

miaka51

Wow I don't see why this is a big deal.  I do think it is okay to talk to 5th and say that its okay if he can't make it, that Fi was just drunk and sholdn't have insisted, but either do it in person in a fun and casual way or have FI do it.  You don't want to give him the impresssion that he will shatter your vision of symmetry (haha) but you also don't want him to see your wedding as a cross to bear.  As for FI not discussing it with you, who cares?  I mean, you were right there when he asked?  Besides, he was drunk... You can't expect him to check in with you before he makes what is clearly within his scope of wedding planning any more than he can expect you to run your dress decisions and flowers by him... Courteous? I guess (if you are that into planning everything TOGETHER). But necessary? Absolutely not.

shanaea87

I can honestly say that I would not be upset if my fiance added another GM that late in the game without giving me a heads up. They are his GM and his choice who he wants to stand up beside him. There is still plenty of time to get him the right things that he needs for the day of.

--All the things you said about how the friend my feel uncomfortable and whatnot really is only your FI's concern. If the friend was upset or anything it is your FI's responsibility to clear it up. But, honestly, men are so different than women when it comes to these kinds of things.

OBX2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:01c32566-426b-4fcc-bf9f-a255ab946986">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]Wow I don't see why this is a big deal.  I do think it is okay to talk to 5th and say that its okay if he can't make it, that Fi was just drunk and sholdn't have insisted, but either do it in person in a fun and casual way or have FI do it.  You don't want to give him the impresssion that he will shatter your vision of symmetry (haha) but you also don't want him to see your wedding as a cross to bear.  As for FI not discussing it with you, <strong>who cares?  I mean, you were right there when he asked? </strong> Besides, he was drunk...<strong> You can't expect him to check in with you before he makes what is clearly within his scope of wedding planning any more than he can expect you to run your dress decisions and flowers by him... </strong>Courteous? I guess (if you are that into planning everything TOGETHER). But necessary? Absolutely not.
Posted by miaka51[/QUOTE]

I care and it doesn't matter if I was right there or not.  Well actually it does b/c I should have never been present to begin with but even still, you don't make a decision like that before communicating.

So let me get this straight:  are any of you having a talk with the FI about whom each of you would like in your WP?  I imagine the answer is yes.  Sooooooo, you can honestly tell me that once the WP has been determined, plans are being made, dresses and suits ordered....then 4.5 months later, your FI does this without even mentioning it to you, that you wouldn't be in the <strong><em>least bit</em></strong> ticked that he didn't at least tell you that he was going to include this person???

I don't believe for a second that any of you wouldn't be slightly irritated by the lack of communication.

Even the best man who was also present last night called me this morning to ask if I was ok b/c even he said that the FI was out of line for not doing this privately and for not talking to me about it first. 

You know what this boils down too?  The FI needs to hold his alcohol, that's what.  This whole thing would have gone down very differently had alcohol not been involved.  Damn you Total Beer & Wine for your vast selection....damn you!!  LOL

Thanks for the vent ladies :)

hlq2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:ee4f381e-3bbe-425d-b5e6-1a102a96e0eb">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent..... : So let me get this straight:  are any of you having a talk with the FI about whom each of you would like in your WP?  I imagine the answer is yes.  Sooooooo, you can honestly tell me that once the WP has been determined, plans are being made, dresses and suits ordered....then 4.5 months later, your FI does this without even mentioning it to you, that you wouldn't be in the least bit ticked that he didn't at least tell you that he was going to include this person???
Posted by OBX2011[/QUOTE]

Yeah, it would bug me; I admit that, and I said I understand your being frustratedm and wanting to vent.

But I still think it's his mess to deal with, not yours.

jemmini6

I don't see the big deal either.  We've been engaged for over 7 months already and chose our WP soon after, but if FI came home today and told me he added someone, I'd be fine with it.  Hell, I went out to happy hour with a friend and asked him to be an usher.  I told FI when I got home "BTW, I asked D to be an usher" and all he said was "Ok, cool".

I think you are waaaay overreacting about this.  It's not like he changed the menu without telling you or something.  HE added another person to HIS WP, I just don't really see how that affects you.

fiddle14

At least you didn't feel the need to add a last-minute bridesmaid to "even up" the sides.  :-)  Who knows if this 5th guy will really make it - when push comes to shove (reserving tuxes, etc.), it might fall through.  Just take a deep breath and leave that ball in your FI's court.  :-)

OnionBiitch

What?????????????  I can't believe he would do something like that!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Are you serious?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!11?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!!????

snwilson0416

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:ee4f381e-3bbe-425d-b5e6-1a102a96e0eb">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent..... :  So let me get this straight:  are any of you having a talk with the FI about whom each of you would like in your WP?  I imagine the answer is yes.  Sooooooo, you can honestly tell me that once the WP has been determined, plans are being made, dresses and suits ordered....then 4.5 months later, your FI does this without even mentioning it to you, that you wouldn't be in the least bit ticked that he didn't at least tell you that he was going to include this person??? I don't believe for a second that any of you wouldn't be slightly irritated by the lack of communication.
Posted by OBX2011[/QUOTE]
Yup, I can honestly say that. Unless it was someone I dislike or something, I just wouldn't care. It's his wedding party, not mine.

StacyJenniges

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:ee4f381e-3bbe-425d-b5e6-1a102a96e0eb">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent..... : I care and it doesn't matter if I was right there or not.  Well actually it does b/c I should have never been present to begin with but even still, you don't make a decision like that before communicating. So let me get this straight:  are any of you having a talk with the FI about whom each of you would like in your WP?  I imagine the answer is yes.  Sooooooo, you can honestly tell me that once the WP has been determined, plans are being made, dresses and suits ordered....then 4.5 months later, your FI does this without even mentioning it to you, that you wouldn't be in the least bit ticked that he didn't at least tell you that he was going to include this person??? I don't believe for a second that any of you wouldn't be slightly irritated by the lack of communication. Even the best man who was also present last night called me this morning to ask if I was ok b/c even he said that the FI was out of line for not doing this privately and for not talking to me about it first.  You know what this boils down too?  The FI needs to hold his alcohol, that's what.  This whole thing would have gone down very differently had alcohol not been involved.  Damn you Total Beer & Wine for your vast selection....damn you!!  LOL Thanks for the vent ladies :)
Posted by OBX2011[/QUOTE]

I think it is unfortant that some people are making you feel as if you have to defend yourself on how you feel.  Just wanted to let you know that there are people out there who would feel the same way as you (which I did mention in an earlier post.)   One of the things I have noticed on these boards and I know others have too is that sometimes people can seem to be a bit mean to the OP.  I'm sure though that part of it is that in written text you are not able to sence tone.  

Good luck with everything and I hope all works out with the friend and 5th groomsman possibly.  I would though let your Fiance know that you would prefer him to talk to you about decissions like this.  

 <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-laughing.gif" border="0" alt="Laughing" title="Laughing" />

OBX2011

Thanks Stacy, I really appreciate your understanding.

I welcome what other posters think b/c it provides insight on how others handle situations but I agree that I feel like I am defending my own feelings here.  That is why I made sure to title this as a vent instead of seeming that I was asking for advice.  And yes, the tone thing is hard to read on the internet and that goes for all the boards.

It felt good to get it out and the FI felt like a complete ass about it and has apologized several times.  It's a respect thing for me.  I wouldn't make such an important decision without talking to him first so that is why I was so irritated that he did the complete opposite, which normally isn't like him but then again, the alcohol level had A LOT to do with that.  And to me, it IS my business b/c this is OUR wedding and I'm pretty darn sure that I have a right to know who is in and who is out.  Why others coudn't understand that is baffling to me.

Drinking and serious questions such as these should never be combined!  There should be a warning label on alcohol bottles that reads:

"Warning if you drink, you may turn into an ass and say things you don't mean.  You will also more than likely regret this the next morning, so please drink in moderation and learn how to handle your shiit"  LOL

The FI needs to call and say hi to the 5th and make sure all is well.  I would just hate for him to feel embarassed and have that added later in the game kind of feeling...if that makes sense?

natbug21

I think you totally have the right to be a little irked that your fiance didnt give you a heads up.  Maybe it's just me, but my fiance and I talk to each other about EVERYTHING, so I would definitely be like "wow, thanks for the heads up" lol. I would be ok about adding another groomsman but I would definitely want to know beforehand.  Seeing as we are getting married we like to talk things over TOGETHER We decided on the bridesmaids and groomsmen together too.  So I will give ya some love here and let you know its OK to be a little peeved at your fiance Just some future advice though, the Knot is not the place to vent or ask about etiquette because these ladies will tear you apart! Its become quite the topic on other boards about how nasty some women on the knot can be!  Anyways, hopefully you can find someone to confide in that wont rip your face off for needing to vent   i'll probably get nasty comments about this comment but hey I really don't give a flying F#*k! Anyways there is my 2 cents Good luck with your wedding!  

snwilson0416

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:abf7026a-c7e8-4686-82cd-94af1ae7273e">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]I think you totally have the right to be a little irked that your fiance didnt give you a heads up.  Maybe it's just me, but my fiance and I talk to each other about EVERYTHING, so I would definitely be like "wow, thanks for the heads up" lol. I would be ok about adding another groomsman but I would definitely want to know beforehand.  Seeing as we are getting married we like to talk things over TOGETHER :) We decided on the bridesmaids and groomsmen together too.  So I will give ya some love here and let you know its OK to be a little peeved at your fiance :) Just some future advice though, the Knot is not the place to vent or ask about etiquette because these ladies will tear you apart! Its become quite the topic on other boards about how nasty some women on the knot can be!  Anyways, hopefully you can find someone to confide in that wont rip your face off for needing to vent :)  i'll probably get nasty comments about this comment but hey I really don't give a flying F#*k! Anyways there is my 2 cents :) Good luck with your wedding!  
Posted by natbug21[/QUOTE]
Nobody ripped her face off... They just gave differing opinions. 

natbug21

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:929c21b3-a02f-4b16-8fcd-cba7463b436c">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent..... : Nobody ripped her face off... They just gave differing opinions. 
Posted by snwilson0416[/QUOTE]

Ok, so there was no one literally "ripping" her face off. It's just an expression and there were many girls on here making her feel bad for how she felt.

Also, in her original post she is not asking for any differing opinions... so again you are wrong.

She wanted to vent about something that was important to HER. Not have everyone tell her she should not be irked. If you didn't agree with her than ya shoulda moved right on along the posts without commenting. If she had wanted your "differeing" opinions I'm sure she would have asked :)

snwilson0416

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:fc9df8c5-86be-4f2b-8861-cc2f21904f77">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent..... : Ok, so there was no one literally "ripping" her face off. It's just an expression and there were many girls on here making her feel bad for how she felt. Also, in her original post she is not asking for any differing opinions... so again you are wrong. She wanted to vent about something that was important to HER. Not have everyone tell her she should not be irked. If you didn't agree with her than ya shoulda moved right on along the posts without commenting. If she had wanted your "differeing" opinions I'm sure she would have asked :)
Posted by natbug21[/QUOTE]
Yes, I'm well aware that it's an expression, thanks, I still feel it was an exaggeration.<div>Also, I'm wrong about what? I said people offered differing opinions. You're telling me they didn't?</div><div>And, hey, guess what? It's a public message board. People can post whatever they want, even if it's not asked for.</div>

natbug21

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:ac86a53b-cd03-4042-963f-a2d49a5d912a">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent..... : Yes, I'm well aware that it's an expression, thanks, I still feel it was an exaggeration. Also, I'm wrong about what? I said people offered differing opinions. You're telling me they didn't? And, hey, guess what? It's a public message board. People can post whatever they want, even if it's not asked for.
Posted by snwilson0416[/QUOTE]

Oh my bad for exaggerating. I think ripping someones face off is always an exaggeration, but hey you seem pretty capable of it. Obviously this is a public message board and people can post whatever they want but for some silly reason I thought it was for future brides to band together and take out some frustration they might be having over planning. Apparently, its not.  But that's cool you can just keep going around posting on boards being a bi*#! about it. Have fun! <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-laughing.gif" border="0" alt="Laughing" title="Laughing" />

vicki0508

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:fc9df8c5-86be-4f2b-8861-cc2f21904f77">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent..... : Ok, so there was no one literally "ripping" her face off. It's just an expression and there were many girls on here making her feel bad for how she felt. Also, in her original post she is not asking for any differing opinions... so again you are wrong. She wanted to vent about something that was important to HER. Not have everyone tell her she should not be irked.<strong> If you didn't agree with her than ya shoulda moved right on along the posts without commenting.</strong> If she had wanted your "differeing" opinions I'm sure she would have asked :)
Posted by natbug21[/QUOTE]
OBX can handle herself.  She doesn't need you "sticking up" for her.

The point of these message boards is to get differing opinions and see what other people think.  If all you (collective you) want to do is vent and don't want anyone's opinions, get a diary.

natbug21

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_did-fi-just-ohhhh-yes-did-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:0976ac8b-3201-4e8b-b4ef-47c7d49dc30aPost:41507a77-84e3-43b7-bc81-ac3bfe2f3f7d">Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent.....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Did my FI Just??? Ohhhh Yes He Did. My Vent..... : OBX can handle herself.  She doesn't need you "sticking up" for her. The point of these message boards is to get differing opinions and see what other people think.  If all you (collective you) want to do is vent and don't want anyone's opinions, get a diary.
Posted by vicki0508[/QUOTE]

Well then I guess its apparent that you don't need to "stick up" for whoever was arguing with me.  Can you say hippocrite? Your diary suggestion is ridiculous. These boards are actually for venting without having everyone and their mom tell you how wrong you are.  I guess I just don't understand why brides are so freaking b!tchy towards their fellow brides. Again, liek i pointed out before, people are totally right when they say brides on the know can be totally rude and unhelpful. You are one of them.