Opinions wanted

ljo128

We were so close to a totally drama free wedding! Now we have a situation, and I'd like a little advice.I have two bridesmaids, my sister and my fiance's brother's girlfriend. I love the gf, she is very sweet and has been with my fiance's brother for many years.Now, the brother is breaking up with her (the wedding is 2 months away) and doesn't want her to be at the wedding.I'm not comfortable asking her not to be in the wedding, but I also don't want to alienate my future brother-in-law. What would you do in this situation?

mbcdefg

I would let it rest a bit. Maybe she will make the decision on her own not to attend. If the breakup was fairly friendly and mutual, then I think you have the right to tell you FBIL that you really want her there and ask that he please respect that (but in turn, don't seat them together or make them do a bridal party dance or anything). But if she cheated on him or something ... then, yeah, I can see why he'd ask you not to invite her. I would talk to your FI and see how you want to handle it. FBIL is going to be a member of your family soon, so I personally wouldn't want to get off on the wrong foot with him if I were you. Sorry. Sounds like a sucky situation all around.

*BeachBride0410*

I understand not wanting to rock the boat with your future family....however you need to think about your friendship with the GF.  Is she someone you want to remain friends with regardless if she is dating the brother or not?  If your answer is yes, then you def. need to keep her in the wedding.  The important thing is you, not the brother's feelings....my opinion of course.

ffmaid

Wait till after he dumps her. I would then ask her is she still wants to be in teh wedding and give her teh out as she is unlikly to want to be in the wedding of her exes brother and sil. Also this kinda depends on if you are really friends seperate from fbil or not. Are you?

blackfire5th

Is he initiating the break-up or did she? It may be the FBIL is heartbroken and seeing her won't let him be happy on your wedding day. I agree with PP, ask her if she would still like to be involved.

ljo128

Thanks everyone! All the responses are in line with my instincts. I will certainly give her the opportunity to step down if she feels uncomfortable, but let her know she's still very welcome.