MOH role question

yellow_grace

I have not asked anything of my one attendant other than she show up and wear a dress in the color of my choice- she picked the style, I bought it. She is wearing her own shoes/jewelry etc. She went dress shopping with me, but that was as a friend since we hadn't picked a WP at that point. Otherwise, she has given a few opinions here and there and fielded a few "oh, crap, what do I do now?" phone calls, but for the most part, I haven't asked her for help, and all help she has given me has been her idea, and very much appreciated.She is planning a bachelorette/relaxation event prior to the wedding, which I just found out and is an awesome surprise! At the wedding, other than walking down the aisle and taking pictures, I don't expect anything of her except to have a good time.Well, maybe I do expect one thing more...I am having frequent nightmares about this, and so I am probably a little off my rocker right now, but... what do you do when you have to go to the bathroom while wearing your wedding dress? I recently had my dress on (bustled up, too) and did a trial run of what I would need to do to use the toilet. Not a one-person job. Not even a 2 person job, maybe.When I was a BM, the bride's dress was very puffy and it took a bunch of us to hold it up for her to pee, then her sister had to help with the clean up in the nether-regions. She just couldn't reach over the puffiness of the dress!My MOH is a good friend- we are both nurses and are used to wiping all sorts of nasty messes. Is it okay to let her know that I will need help and can she help me with this, please? If she declines (which I doubt, but is possible) who do I ask or what do I do? My sister is also a nurse but will be unable to attend. My mom could help, I guess, as could my FMIL, but I don't really feel comfortable with that.I know I sound nuts. I am sorry. I just find really random things to worry about, I guess:) Would love to hear what you did, and want to make sure I am not expecting too much from my MOH!

Leah&Christian09

My sister/MOH is a nurse, too. She went with me to a fitting, and she thought of it. I asked her if she'd help, and of course she said she would. I'm sure your friend will be totally cool with it, too. The trick my DOC taught me: Go forward on the toilet. You can hold up the front of your dress with one hand, and she can hold the back off the ground. Then you can sit or squat.

sapphirebaby926

I'd ask her ahead of time and see how she feels about it - if she declines then talk to mom or any other female friends you are comfortable with that would be willing to help outYou might want to try this though - when you go to the bathroom face the tank of the toilet lift your dress up and straddle the toilet, squat on it and go that wayI have heard of people doing this with success and may be an alternative for you

Sunny0710

lol- this is hilarious! I think only you can answer this question- if you think that you are close enough that she wouldn't be offended/grossed out, go ahead and ask! If you are too afraid to ask, or unsure how she will respond, rely on your sis and mom.

bablingbrooke

So that was my nightmare too because I have TB (Tiny Bladder) and thought I'd NEVER make it through the ceremony and reception. And I was right. My dress was a drop-waist A-line that wasn't too poofy. So when I had to go, all my wonderful BMs volunteered to help. I said I wanted to give it a go and if I couldn't do it, I'd call them in. So they all stood at the ready next to the door. (I'd already perfected the hover method in my world travels to countries that aren't where I'd like them to be with their toilets/plumbing. So that definitely came in handy. Practice now!) I gathered up all the hems around my waist, pulled them up, hovered, and hoped for the best. It worked! I shouted "Success!" to the BMs. They started cheering. So long story short, if you don't have a meringue-style dress you SHOULD be okay. But true friends will be there to help! My bathroom emergency came right before the ceremony, but I was too busy talking/dancing/schmoozing/posing for photos that despite the copious amount of alcohol I consumed, I didn't have to go. I managed to make it all the way to the bridal suite! DH was very impressed, since he's always amazed at how frequently I have to go on airplanes. So you might be okay.

banana468

Great ideas about going forward!My BMs helped me use the bathroom.  It was fine by all of them to do so.FWIW, I used the bathroom once at the reception.  Even though I didn't drink a lot, with all the dancing, it just wasn't necessary. 

alison1209

I was the MOH in my best friend's wedding and helped her with this issue - and she's already volunteered to help me! One less thing to worry about, right?!

liashke

Can I just say I appreciate the tips?   Definitely something to keep in mind, though I hope-hope-hope this won't be an issue for me.  (Though if it is, one of my BMs works at a hospital and is used to things like that.)

swim1011

If your dress isn't terribly huge, this won't be too much of a problem.  I helped my bff just by holding up the train for her, since she is very tiny, and her dress was a lot bigger than she was!  I think your MOH, mom or sister will be more than willing to help you out.

CTGirl30

I can see this becoming a source of hilarity among my 4 BMs and I on my wedding day....my gown itself is not huge and unmanageable, but I will be wearing a big poufy crinoline under it which should make things fun...*sigh* GL!  

mbcdefg

I don't think it's a bridezilla move to politely ask your BMs if they can help you with something ... the bridezillaness just comes in when the bride biitches that her friends won't do it even though "they have to" ("She didn't want to help me wipe my butt even though it's her DUTY!!!") or if she biitches that they didn't "know" to do it even though the bride never asked her (like if you'd said, "MOH didn't follow me around all night and ask if I needed help going to the bathroom, she should've instinctively known when I had to pee, what a jerk, waaahhhh!!!!!") My dress is a two-piece, so I'm just hoping I can take off the skirt and then put it back on when I'm finished. *crosses fingers*Oh, Retread, you forgot to wipe

Liz4444

one of my friends who isn't even in the bridal party told me she'd be my "bathroom buddy"... she offered, i didn't even ask!  now that's a good friend!i haven't thought about how i'm going to wipe, that's going to be a problem...

hanron007

hey I don't have any advice or anything, I just wanted to tell the OP that your family is absolutely beautiful.

yellow_grace

Thanks for all the advice! The going forward thing sounds like a good plan:) And I will talk to my MOH and see if she is cool with helping. Hanron- thanks:) I like us, too!

thesportsgal21

Wiping tip: Get a big (and I mean huuuuuge) ball of toilet paper. It will be easier to reach. Albeit kind of wasteful.... but what the hay, just this once

tommyandy

practice practice practice going in just your wedding underthings - undies, slip, hose, heels, and all.

Liz4444

warning, gross question... how do you reach your hooha, even if you have a big wad of toilet paper, if your skirt is fully over your head and your arms are in the skirt ball?

KM51240

Hi all,I had a pretty big skirt all bustled up behind me & I was able to figure it out with just the MOH helping.   She pulled the back up behind my head & pulled up the front from the ground.  I pulled both of the sides up and held them under my armpits.  That allowed at least a hand to be free to reach under the skirt with the big paper wad. :)Hope that helps!  It's really not too bad!

themidge

wow - i'm glad someone thought of this because i never would have!

blueyesvt

never mind the wiping. just shake dry

ashleyandjerry2010

I'm sure my MOH will be willing to help me, and my mom... luckily we'll have time between the ceremony and reception where we can run home and use a clean bathroom so I wont have to worry about it (hopefully)... I love the ideas though!