BM called me crazy...

fperez7542

All because of the hair comment I made.  Yesterday I asked here what are your BMs are doing for their hair.  Well one day over lunch they asked me what I wanted, I said I don't know, so my MOH and (4) BMs decided that the MOH would have loose hair and the BM will have same up-do.  Thing is they all have different lengths and types of hair so I asked on here so I could get a better idea of what people do.  So yesterday I told two of the BMs maybe you guys should just do whatever you want (loose or up do), doesn't have to match.  That led to the 1. everything is going to look messy, hairstylist do miracles with short hair, oh you are crazy if you tell everyone that, it won't look nice at all.

So I asked nicely send me pics of the up-do you like and of course they are beautiful which I didn't doubt, but they are for people with long hair.  One of my BMs has a cut that is sorta like a boy cut, the other is above chin, another below chin and then the last two are over the shoulders.    Just seems weird to me that I say do whatever, but I get called crazy. I guess their "whatever" is matching :-/

rel1988

I'm just kinda confused I guess...so you are telling them they can do whatever they want to their hair but asking to see pictures of what their hairstyles will look like 6mths in advance?

AJuliaNJ

Just step away from the hair issue completely. Give yourself one less responsibility and trust your bridesmaids to make their own hair choices. Also let any BM that is trying to dictate how the rest of them do their hair you would like her to back off.

fperez7542

I have been scheduling hair and make up trials for me.  I asked if they are interested in having the same person do their hair and make up.  It is only if they want, I am not requesting this. All except one will be doing hair and make up.  The MUA I have spoken to asked for pictures of what I want for myself and samples of what the ladies like if they so choose to go with her. 

So, yes I have asked for pictures of what they like.  It isn't 100% concrete, I just wanted to know what they are looking to do if they want the same up do.  One of them sent me like 3 pictures, another 2.  Its just to see, I'm not holding them to anything.

fperez7542

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bm-called-me-crazy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:1663675e-f4cd-4f50-9e5c-1ce010f34906Post:2bca2e29-2577-4485-85ec-8cf4a9f9947a">Re:BM called me crazy...</a>:
[QUOTE]Just step away from the hair issue completely. Give yourself one less responsibility and trust your bridesmaids to make their own hair choices. Also let any BM that is trying to dictate how the rest of them do their hair you would like her to back off.
Posted by AndreaJulia[/QUOTE]

Andrea, that is my concern. The hair isn't the big deal.  Like I said I don't care what they do, high, low, loose.  Whatever they feel comfortable.  My issue is one BM telling the rest us 4 have to have this style and the MOH this one.  Its not nice, when I don't mind.

AJuliaNJ

In Response to Re:BM called me crazy...:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:BM called me crazy...:Just step away from the hair issue completely. Give yourself one less responsibility and trust your bridesmaids to make their own hair choices. Also let any BM that is trying to dictate how the rest of them do their hair you would like her to back off.Posted by AndreaJuliaAndrea, that is my concern. The hair isn't the big deal.nbsp; Like I said I don't care what they do, high, low, loose.nbsp; Whatever they feel comfortable.nbsp; My issue is one BM telling the rest us 4 have to have this style and the MOH this one.nbsp; Its not nice, when I don't mind. Posted by fperez7542[/QUOTE]

I would talk to her. She probably thinks she is helping. She may feel that this is what you want but are too nice to say. I wouldn't make it into a "talk" but make it clear in normal conversation that you want to let everyone do their own thing.

ladytori

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bm-called-me-crazy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:1663675e-f4cd-4f50-9e5c-1ce010f34906Post:d8c39654-faf4-4dc1-94c7-2b628cfc54d7">BM called me crazy...</a>:
[QUOTE]All because of the hair comment I made.  Yesterday I asked here what are your BMs are doing for their hair.  Well one day over lunch they asked me what I wanted, I said I don't know, so my MOH and (4) BMs decided that the MOH would have loose hair and the BM will have same up-do.  Thing is they all have different lengths and types of hair so I asked on here so I could get a better idea of what people do.  So yesterday I told two of the BMs maybe you guys should just do whatever you want (loose or up do), doesn't have to match.  That led to the 1. everything is going to look messy, hairstylist do miracles with short hair, oh you are crazy if you tell everyone that, it won't look nice at all. So I asked nicely send me pics of the up-do you like and of course they are beautiful which I didn't doubt, but they are for people with long hair.  One of my BMs has a cut that is sorta like a boy cut, the other is above chin, another below chin and then the last two are over the shoulders.    Just seems weird to me that I say do whatever, but I get called crazy. I guess their "whatever" is matching :-/
Posted by fperez7542[/QUOTE]

They are adult women who have been doing their hair for years. You don't need to approve pictures of their hair styles. Let them come up with styles on their own. If they want to get their hair done at a salon and bring pictures - that is their decision. The stylist will tell them what styles can and cannot be done.

MoonlightSilver

I told the three girls in our wedding party to wear their hair how ever they wanted. They decided together that they would all do very similar styles. It actually ended up looking very very good- and because it was their decision, I didn't worry about it one bit.

najordan89

I haven't even touched the situation of hair and/or jewelry. I don't want to force them to wear something they don't like.