I am the youngest of three girls in my family. I asked my two older sisters to be my maids of honor. For each of the two previous weddings of my sisters', there have been two maids of honor (the two sisters that weren't getting married that day) and we alternated who stands next to the bride. After my sisters found out that my fiance and I were having a destination wedding in Belize, they told me that they couldn't go because it was going to be too expensive. As I was going to have four bridesmaids, if my two maids of honor can't attend, that deletes half of my wedding party. They are so special to me and I feel like I cannot just replace them with other friends. Therefore, I am not going to have bridesmaids anymore (or groomsmen either, which my fiance is fine with). We thought about having bridesmaids/groomsmen for the reception we are holding back at home that everyone that can't make it to Belize can go to, but my sisters thought that idea was stupid. Now, the sister who has not had a turn yet to stand next to the bride is upset and says that she feels like she got "screwed over." This tells me that in her opinion, being the maid of honor that stands next to the bride is only about being next to the bride in the pictures and on the altar in the church/head table at the reception for everyone to see. To me, being a maid of honor is more about helping and supporting the bride throughout her wedding planning. I feel kind of disappointed that I can't (or rather, won't) have bridesmaids because my two maids of honor can't (or won't) make it to the wedding. My wedding is not until March 2013. I got engaged in March 2011, giving guests 2 years to save money for it and they still said that it would cost too much. We are averaging the price to be about $2000/person and I have offered to help them with what ever they cannot afford themselves. One sister said she is saving to have a baby and the other sister said she is saving to buy a house; neither can save enough for a baby/house and a trip to Belize. I don't want to put my needs above theirs, but I can't help but feel unsupported by them.
My two questions include the following: 1) does the maid of honor that was suppossed to stand up next to me have a right to feel "screwed over"? and 2) do I have a right to feel upset about my maids of honor not attending the wedding or am I being unreasonable to ask them to be my maids of honor in a destination wedding?