Not my friend anymore

ChristieSteve

I have a friend who used to be my very best friend in college (I'm 24 now), but when she graduated, she moved several hours away and we basically lost contact. Occasionally we would see each other for other friends' weddings, and most of the time, she was rude to me, making some comment about how bad my outfit/hair/makeup/etc was while still acting like my best friend. Thing is, now that I'm engaged, she expects to be in the wedding party. I'll always care about her as a friend, but we're not close. In fact, when I called her to tell her I was engaged, she said we'd have lunch and talk when she was in town in a few weeks then never called me (but did call and hang out with one of our mutual friends). How do I invite her to the wedding, but not to be part of it?
Also, my MOH is friends with this girl as well. The three of us were roommates in college. While my MOH originally supported my decision not to include her, she recently began mentioning that maybe I should just to keep the peace. I'm in a weird place and I'm not sure what to do.

trix1223

My DD was in a similar situation.  Three girls in an apartment, and a fourth who made up the last in the quartet.  Three of the four remained friends.  One did not.  DD chose the other two girls to be in the WP, but not the one with whom she was no longer friends at all.

DD didn't feel bad about it, and the other friends completely understood.  "Left out girl" wasn't particularly happy about it, but oh well.

You don't OWE anyone a place in a WP.  Ask your friends and then own the decision.

trix1223

Also just checked:  your wedding is over a year away.  You won't send out invitations for a full year.  It's waaaaaaaay to early to be worrying about both your WP and particularly your specific guest list.

It's 100% possible that you won't even invite this chica to your wedding.  I was going to say to put this on the back burner.  But really, take the pot off the stove and put it away.  You won't be needing it for a year.