Wedding Party

Non Traditional Party

Hi all ,

I am two years out from my wedding date, so i am just trying to get my basics down now. My dilema is that i want one of my guy friends to be in the bridal party; however, i am not sure how to pull this off. I am considering only two other girls in the party and him. My fiance would have three groomsmen as well.

Any suggestions are greatly appreciated! I am quite excited, but am taking the lead from others and not inviting anyone to be a bridesmaid/person for at least another year, so i have time to play with the idea.

Thanks all!!

Re: Non Traditional Party

  • Don't ask anyone until you're about 10 months out. Why?  Scroll down this board to see countless posts from people who asked as far out as you are and now relationships have changed, and they're trying to find a way to kick someone out.  Save yourself potential drama.

    If, when the time is right, you want to have an attendant on your side who is a male, why not?

    WPs are NOT about symmetry or gender.  It's about having those you care most about stand with you on your wedding day.  So go for it.  It's actually not all that unusual or uncommon anymore.

    Your attendant can just wear the same suit/tux as the other men wear, and he stands on your side of the aisle.  For processional, he walks down the same as the other BMs do.  For the recessional, he either walks side by side with a GM, or everyone walks out single file. 

    Go for it.  Just not yet.  =)
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • edited March 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_non-traditional-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:3d6f8a1a-d7bf-4376-8ac7-5ec67dbdd4a7Post:c69fe3be-c3f6-496d-b825-57f0b94f7510">Non Traditional Party</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hi all , I am two years out from my wedding date, so i am just trying to get my basics down now. My dilema is that i want one of my guy friends to be in the bridal party; however, i am not sure how to pull this off. I am considering only two other girls in the party and him. My fiance would have three groomsmen as well. Any suggestions are greatly appreciated! I am quite excited, but am taking the lead from others and not inviting anyone to be a bridesmaid/person for at least another year, so i have time to play with the idea. Thanks all!!
    Posted by [email protected][/QUOTE]<div>
    <div>It sounds like you are already planning to wait another year to ask--which is good. When the time comes absolutely ask your guy friend. Ditto Trix for the processional/recessional logistics. Did you have any specific questions about how it should work? I guess I'm just not sure what you're asking about...</div></div>
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  • You don't have a dilemma at all.  Ask your guy friend - mixed gender parties are becoming more and more common.  My FI and I are planning on doing it - I want to have my brother and BIL on my side and he wants to have his two SILs on his side.  There's nothing much to pull off.  He can either wear the same thing as the GM or coordinate with the BMs if you prefer.
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  • oops. thanks lala.  I completely jumped over the part where she's waiting to ask.  OP:  Just ignore that part of my reply.  sorry.  ;0
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • What exactly is your question?  What the bridesman would wear?  What the groomswomen would wear?  How they'd walk down the aisle?  Whether this is too radical (it's not and if people are surprised they'll get over it)?  

    Happy to try to help but some more detail about what it is you're wondering about would be helpful.
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  • We have a bridesman (my brother) and a groomswoman (FI's close friend).  I'm wholeheartedly in support of people standing up for whichever person they're closest to, not whichever one has the same naughty bits as them.

    Our colors are a little different, but here's what they're all wearing:

    Bridesman: Black tux, black shirt, silver vest and tie
    Bridesmaids: Black dress, silver accent
    Groomsmen: White tux, black shirt, silver vest and tie
    Groomswoman: Black and silver dress (I was going for all silver, but that's what she ended up with), with a white pashmina

    I was going to do a pin-on corsage for the GW, but she opted for a wrist one.  I think we're doing pocket squares instead of bouts for all of the guys, mine and his.

    So how you dress your bridesman will depend on how the rest of your party is dressed.  If the guys have black vests and ties, maybe he could wear the same color as the bridesmaids.  Or he and the bridesmaids could wear one of your colors, and the groomsmen could wear another.  Or you could put all of the guys in the same thing.  There aren't really rules, it's just a matter of what you and your FI think will look best, and what everyone is comfortable with.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_non-traditional-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:3d6f8a1a-d7bf-4376-8ac7-5ec67dbdd4a7Post:9c3cc141-1fb0-47f8-877b-c7b1f1a2abd0">Re: Non Traditional Party</a>:
    [QUOTE] I'm wholeheartedly in support of people standing up for whichever person they're closest to, not whichever one has the same naughty bits as them.
    Posted by aerinpegadrak[/QUOTE]
     
    Excellent.  Pretty much hits the nail on the head, and made me smile, too
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • I love this idea! I wanted my brother to stand up with me but he felt wierd and thought I was nuts. So he is standing up with FI instead (they are friends too).
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  • Sorry to have been so ambiguous on the initial post. Yes, dress was what i was most concerned with. I am not sure how "formal" the party is going to be - My FI (btw, is that short for Fiance?) is really laid back - jeans and tee kinda guy - so i am really toying with some sort of laid back attire for the groomsmen, with his input, of course.

    The radical part, yes, it will be hard because both my fiance and i are from traditional families, buthe is my oldest friend, so it would make sense for him to be on my side...they are friends by association with me only...

    WHEW! Lots of input, which i am VERY appreciative of!! Good to know so many are watching the posts!!

    BTW, how do you guys get your little counter thingy to show up? :) -- not that mine makes much sense right now, but it's good to know going forward! Cool
  • Yes, FI = Fiance.

    Wedding tickers are on the sidebar on the left.  Then you just c&p (copy and paste) the code into your signature.
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