Ok, so when I got engaged, one of the first things FI and I did was draft up the wedding party. It was important to me to have an even amount of people on each side. Unfortunately, I have a somewhat large, tight-knit group of friends. So in my original draft, I put all seven of them in. So, FI chose his four best friends, his brother, my brother, and that left one spot open on his side. We discussed it and we agreed that we would ask my best male friend to be his seventh groomsman. I immediately alerted five of the seven girls (I'm somewhat closer to those five than I am to the other two) and we began planning. I also mentioned it to my male friend. Not a formal invite, by any means. I just mentioned it off-handedly one night while we were at the bar and did not illicit much of a response from him.
Now here's the pickle I'm in. We decided that seven attendants on each side might be a little much and have seriously considered cutting it to five. That's not a problem for me since I haven't even talked to two girls about it. And FI has no problem cutting out one of his friends that he hasn't been close to for the past few years.
But for the sides to remain even (which, though admittedly silly, is something that is important to me), we need to take another person off his list. The natural choice would be my friend, since he's the only one who is not really involved in my FI's life. But where I mentioned it to him, however casually, I'm kind of nervous to do so. FI is also willing to cut his brother, who is more than twice our age, and to whom he is not very close. But I'd feel awful if he cut out his brother and had my friend instead.
As I mentioned, my friend was pretty indifferent to the idea. I think he just said "Cool" and ordered another beer. And I don't think he would be offended if I just never brought it up again. But, at the same time, I know that just because I expect him not to care doesn't mean that will happen.
I know better than this and I can't believe I was dumb enough to say something to him before anything was finalized. I was just drunk and excited and couldn't contain myself. What would you all do in my position (aside from stay sober and smart lol)?