I am getting married in September and I insisted on two maids of honnor. My resoning was that for one my fiance coulnd't pick between his two best friends for the bm position so why should i. Well here's what has happened since then.
My best friend from high school asked me to be her moh two years ago, and as honnered as i was to do it, unfourtnatly that sweet girl i had grown up with turned into bridezilla and though i went above and beyond everything she asked me (spending almost $2000 along the way) i never got so much as a thank you card from her until months after the wedding and the bridal party gift i recived? It was a candle that i had bought for her bridal shower that while cleaning up she asked if she could keep, only to regift it to me 3 months later. And i don't want to have to put any of my friends through something like that, so my thought process was why not devide the work
So after that horrible experince which almost ruined our friendship I asked my cousin, who is as close to me as a sister would be and my bridezilla friend to be my two maids of honnor. I asked them back in November right after I got engaged, my cousin was amazing she did everything I asked, and helped me stay on track everything a bride could want. My bridezilla friend? not so much, after being in and out of wedding planning she calls me at the begining of febuary saying that she can't be apart of my wedding anymore. Her resoning? She dosn't agree with my lifestyle (she's very religous) and she can't pretend to be happy for me when inside she thinks i'm making a mistake. So unless I change my sinfull ways she can't be apart of my wedding party.
After crying for about a week I talked to my fiance and I decided that we should just promote the bridesmaid who was actually acting like a moh and let my bridezilla friend off the hook. So we talked it over with my cousin and she was excited finally admiting that she had never really liked my former moh but loved this bm that we wanted to promote. So after clearing it with my bm (who was also really excited to be the new moh) we thought all of our problems were over with.
Unfortunatly when I finally started talking to the former moh again she was upset with me for replacing for. saying that i would rather replace her than try to change my life. I basically told her it was none of her buisness and said she was welcome to come and be a bridesmaid but she can't flake out on me anymore like this. She agreed. But now i'm wondering should i have a backup bridesmaid? I have a friend who is helping to walk the two ring bearers down the alise cause they're so young, she knows the whole story, should i ask her if she minds being a backup?