BRIDESMAIDZILLA!! Can someone give me some advice as to how to handle a rude bridesmaid?

JaxInBlue

My sister's boyfriend celebrated his birthday on our wedding day.  My sister, who was also my MOH, got up early than all of us, had a "birthday breakfast" with cupcakes with him and his family and met the rest of us at the salon.  Did it make her a terrible MOH?  Nope.  She was fabulous - went overboard helping out and was totally accesible to do the things a MOH does on the wedding day (hold flowers, help with train, sign marriage license).  Did people walk around wishing us a Happy Boyfriend's Birthday day?  Nope.  I highly doubt anyone beyond some mutual friends and immediate family knew it was his birthday. 

Moral of the story: weddings and birthdays can co-exist.  Let it go, let them travel when they want.  Her birthday won't steal focus from your wedding even if she arrives in Las Vegas early to celebrate it with some of the same people who will be at your wedding.  It's not worth your time or your stress level to make this out to be a competition.

RamonaFlowers

So ... your problem is that she's going to get to Vegas few days before you so she can actually enjoy Vegas for her birthday, something that has absolutely zero bearing on your wedding or her/the rest of your WP's ability to be at your wedding?

Are you out of your effing mind?

OliveOilsMom

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bridesmaidzilla-can-someone-give-advice-handle-rude-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:5a2b1343-f5c5-418e-be3f-2910e0439b6fPost:8a05160a-0f5e-4bc2-8a7c-648a017f71c4">Re: BRIDESMAIDZILLA!! Can someone give me some advice as to how to handle a rude bridesmaid?</a>:
[QUOTE]When I say MY, obviously I'm talking about OUR because obviously I'm not marrying myself.  And I don't dictate when people are going, we're just all going together because of the group reservation that we all sat down and agreed upon and paid the deposit for.  So that was a group effort, not me telling people what to do.  I also don't NEED an entourage...if you knew me, I am not that way.  I simply had a problem with her trying to change our plans for her birthday.  I could care less if she went on her own or not.  I don't need her telling other people in our wedding party to cancel the plan that we already made to accommodate her birthday WHICH IS A WEEK BEFORE THE WEDDING...actually a week and 4 days so her birthday has nothing to do with my wedding at all.  She has been rude to me & especially to my fiance since we asked her to be a part of this and not just about this situation.  She has a problem with EVERYTHING.  And I don't think the brother would choose this girl over his family because of this anyway.  
Posted by tiffanykm01[/QUOTE]

Funny, I always say "our wedding", because it is our wedding.  When a bride needs to feel justification for doing something stupid, they always say "But its MY wedding!" 

Don't ever count on that.  You will be surprised at how many times a bf will choose his gf over family.  It happens more than you think, so don't count on FI's brother to choose his family over the gf.

Also, if BIL and gf want to change their plane ticket (and anyone else who wants to go earlier to Vegas), it's on them to either eat the deposit they have already put down or pay the change fee that airlines charge.

Ali092011

Everything PPs said... And also! Since you are so concerned about everyone's travel plans, did you consider that it might be NICE to have everyone in Vegas already when you get there? No worries about late flights, traffic, delays, people not getting out of bed on time... If they all go a few days before, you can relax and worry only about getting yourself there and enjoying your flight. Just sayin'.

Sydney91

Possible solution: you all go early so you get to travel together and she gets her birthday. Compromise? You'll need this skill when you are married. IMHO, I pity your bridesmaid and if I were her, I most likely would tell you to take a hike.

It is NOT your day. It is your fiance's and your day. Lose the princess mentality. You sound as though you are five years old. Her birthday is important to her and if you don't care about it in some way, then why oh why is she your friend? Your friends are not robots. They have thoughts and feelings just like you. In addition, the wedding is ONE DAY. That's it. No more. In all actuality, it's part of the day. Mine will be approximately 7 hours long. Not even 1/3 of a day. get over yourself now and save a lot of people their problems. Maybe the wedding planning has altered your personality, but I'm surprised you havn't had more people tell you that you are selfish. I apologize for being mean, but you need a reality check in a big way.

HannahK15

all i can say is wow!