Great Idea to ask them to be your wedding party

klmgrad04

Was wanting something cute but personal on how to ask my girls to be part of my special day.

kristid2

 When my best friend got married she bought "will you be my MOH/BM?" cards from party city and gave them to us one night when we all went to dinner. It was neat and I still have the card.

trix1223

Scroll down.  There are several posts on this topic below.  But my answer:

Just ask them.  The honor is in BEING asked, not in HOW you're asked.

In the coming months, the wedding industry, including magazines, websites, and tv shows will do their best to convince you that every single aspect of your wedding must be a production, or your wedding won't be special, memorable, creative, or unique. 

And that's just not true.  They are trying to suck you into buying the products their advertisers sell.  You wedding will be special, memorable, creative, and unique because it is your wedding.  Not because you bought into the wedding hype.

I'd advise two things here:  Your wedding is over a year away.  Don't ask until about 8 months out.  Why?  When you're scrolling down looking for posts about this question, stop in at the many posts that talk about kicking out a BM.

Way too many brides ask this early, and then relationships change.....life happens, and they want to boot a BM.  And you can't. 

There's NO reason to ask this early, and a dozen reasons to wait.  There's nothing for a WP to do this far out, so why ask?

Second:  when it is time:  ask each friend separately rather than in a group.  That way, if someone does have to decline the answer, they don't experience the peer pressure of being the one saying "sorry but...." while everyone else is squeeing at you.

Seriously, will your friends and family be any more honored by a card or a cookie shaped like a dress that they will with a phone call?

This can be the first step in the "I'm not going to turn everything into a production" moments of wedding planning.

Congrats on your engagement.

mbcdefg

I just asked. But my BMs and I are not very sentimental or gushy people.

If you know of something they would love (card, scrapbook, wine or chocolates, mix CD, whatever), go ahead and get it for them. If you think they'd just like a simple question, that is fine too.

aerinpegadrak

Just ask.  Bringing something "cute" into the picture is just emphasizing style over substance, and brides who do that are the ones who send their friends running screaming into the night.

CTGirl30

Ditto Trix - and also, I just asked.  I asked each girl individually - 3 of them over dinner and 1 over the phone. You don't need cutsey ideas or to make a big production out of it - I promise that being asked is the special part they'll remember and a heartfelt, "Will you do me the honor of being my bridesmaid?" will mean alot to them.