Bridal Shower and Bachelorette in the same weekend?!

Alyssa927

Most of my bridesmaids live about 5 hours away and have requested that I have my bridal shower and bachelorette party in the same weekend. This would mean bridal shower saturday early-mid afternoon and bachelorette saturday night. I am not sure I want to do this. I don't want to seem demanding and I know they are busy, but I want to enjoy both events and don't want to be rushed. Has anyone attempted having both in the same weekend?

Any suggestions or advice would be greatly appreciated! Thank you!

~AM

aerinpegadrak

We were planning to do them both in the same weekend, because my family is scattered all over the place.  But most of my family will barely be able to afford to travel out for the wedding, and there's no way they could do it twice.  So MOH scrapped the shower.

You don't really get a say in the planning of these parties.  They're a gift that you should accept graciously.  Neither one of them needs to be a massive all-day blowout, so there's no reason that you should feel rushed.

emilyinchile

I don't know why you would feel rushed. Assuming your bridal shower is during the day, it would be over long before any bach stuff starts...it's not like your shower is going to be a 10-hour long party. I personally haven't done this because I didn't have a shower (although I know other people who have), but I think this is a totally unfounded concern.

You are welcome to decline one or both parties. However, it's not your place to ask that they be rescheduled - as Aerin said, these are gifts that your friends can choose to give you, and if they can all only come into town once (obviously on a weekend that works for you), then it's not fair for you to ask them to do more than that.

banana468

I think as long as your BMs plan well, you won't feel rushed.  And well, if they're the ones doing the planning (and they or others should be - not you) then they won't be rushed either.

I've attended a few shower or bachelorettes like this.

Situation 1: Bachelorette was Saturday and shower was Sunday.  In this instance, the bachelorette was rather subdued and we were back to the 'home base' by midnight or so with the shower starting the following morning at 11.  Worked out fine.

Situation 2: Shower began at noon and the bachelorette began at 5 or 6.  The same people hosted the shower and bachelorette and the planning also worked out fine.   The key is to leave enough of a buffer between the two events so that no one involved is rushed between the two.  The other thing is to plan a 'not so regimented' second event so it can be a little more go with the flow.

AdeleDazeem

My mother and I are planning my sister's bridal shower for Sunday.  Since all of her bridesmaids will be in town (from far and wide), we decided a simple bachelorette party on Saturday was a good idea.  Because of the shower we are keeping it simple: a spa trip and a nice dinner in the city. 

Since my sister hasn't seen some of these girls in a long time, it gives everyone a chance to catch up and no one will be hungover and the shower the next day.

The local bridesmaids and I are putting together a more happy hour bachelorette party for the local people later in the month. 

bablingbrooke

I've been a part of this.  The bach party was kind of the afterparty for the shower.  It's actually a lot of fun.  You won't feel rushed, you'll enjoy it.  

gottahavashorti

You should be fine.  If you're not comfortable with it though, it's okay to turn down one of the parties.

nfguthrie

For mine, the bachelorette was Sat. night and the shower on Sunday.  I just made sure not to drink too much on Sat.  I was a little tired the next day, but I was excited about the shower, so it didn't end up mattering.  It's really nice that your friends want to do these things for you. 

emilykathleen511

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bridal-shower-bachelorette-same-weekend?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:7c14d23b-ebff-42cd-9f64-200588945cd1Post:445f6603-492f-4a14-b051-ead60447ca49">Bridal Shower and Bachelorette in the same weekend?!</a>:
[QUOTE]Most of my bridesmaids live about 5 hours away and have requested that I have my bridal shower and bachelorette party in the same weekend. This would mean bridal shower saturday early-mid afternoon and bachelorette saturday night. I am not sure I want to do this. I don't want to seem demanding and I know they are busy, but I want to enjoy both events and don't want to be rushed. Has anyone attempted having both in the same weekend? Any suggestions or advice would be greatly appreciated! Thank you! ~AM
Posted by Alyssa927[/QUOTE]

<div>Both of my sisters had afternoon showers followed by evening/night bachelorette parties. They both worked out great. It was especially convenient for those who were attending both because they only had to keep one day open, and those who were out of town were already in town.</div>

trix1223

My DD's b-party was on a Saturday night, and the shower started at 1:30 on Sunday afternoon.  It was great, and very thoughtful for her bridesmaids who were all OOT.

SandDD

If your BP decides to do this, please make sure someone thinks of the time it takes to unload/transport gifts.  I was a BM in a wedding and double booked for something after the Shower, thinking I had plenty of time. We didn't count on the fact that her FMIL didn't "do boxes" and we didn't have enough help--heels + stairs + gifts don't mix well!

Maybe getting ready at a hotel (if your OOT girls are staying at one) will give everyone a chance to unwind with some champagne and do girly things like each other's makeup?  I think it can be done, especially if it will take the burden off your girls travel schedule.

Worse comes to worst--if you have the time available--take Monday off for yourself!  Sleep in, organize your gifts and cards for thank you's and enjoy a 4 day work week!

Alyssa927

I apologize if I came off whiny, I have never done a twofer before and wasn't sure how it would play out and the time it would require. So thank you for all your input, it definetely seems like it would work out well!

banana468

Yes - shower first and bachelorette later works out MUCH better.

The note about the gift transportation is HUGE.  You'll want someone who can either store or transport gifts back to a convenient place.  We're in a recession now.  Don't leave them in your cars!

Ldelaney12

Selfishly, I thought would prefer to have the Bachllorette and Bridal Shower on different weekends, but when it got right down to it, my bridesmaids are from different states and the only way to have most of them attend as much as possible was to have them both on the same weekend.

It matters much more to me to be able to celebrate with my closest friends so we are having the bachellorette party on Friday night and the shower on Sunday morning/early afternoon. None of us want to be hung over during the shower, and the bachellorette festivities don't have to get started earlier, so this seemed like the best decision.

signingjulie

I had my shower and bachelorette party in the same weekend - shower Saturday afternoon, bachelorette party Saturday night.  It worked out fine, there was enough time in between to do everything.  The bach. party was a bit on the tamer side, because the same friend/BM was planning both and we were both up pretty early that morning and exhausted by the time the bach. party rolled around.  It was convenient because I had people coming in from out of town and they could be there for both events.

rgeddy

We're doing the bridal shower, bachalorette & wedding all on the same weekend.  With too many people scattered all over the country people can't afford to schedule multiple flights/hotel etc esp with elderly family and college BM with no money!