Bridesmaid Contact Info

blegare

Now that I've asked all of my bridesmaids (and they have all accepted) I wanted to share each of their contact info with the others in a cute way.  When I asked them to be my bridesmaid (officially) I mailed them each the book "You can wear it again" with a note inside. I'd like to do something similar for the contact info - an email or typed letter just seems so impersonal - but can't come up with anything. Does anyone have any ideas?

stina93446

It's nice that you did the book sending, but sending the contact info in a 'special' way is really unnecessary. Just send them an email. You wedding is a year away so if you keep doing all these awesome wedding things, they are going to get burnt out. Just email them and leave it at that.

mbcdefg

I would just wait and see if they ask for each others' contact info, and then e-mail a list to each of them. No need to make it all cutesy or unique.

suz62984

I agree with Stina. Sending contact information in a "cutsie" way is beyond unnecessary.  You said that an email or typed letter with the info seems impersonal? I kinda get the impersonal vibe from everyone getting the same book in the mail with a note inside. If you want everything to be "personal" why wouldn't you just ask them in person and say what you needed to say? IMO

blegare

suz - i couldn't ask them in person - we are spread out all over the country and to be honest, i find your reply a little bit rude.  the books were the same, but the notes definitely were not. and, they all loved the books. having been a bridesmaid several times, i always appreciated personal touches to things like this, hence why i wanted to include them. 

suz62984

I understand your side of it; I never thought the notes would be exactly the same. It's just my opinion. Personally I would have preferred a phone call over a book. And even if they didn't like the book, they would never tell you that.

stina93446

I didn't see Suz as being rude, and it's known info that the notes were different. She was obviously talking about the book.

Again, either send them an email or like someone else suggested, wait until THEY ask for the info. 

And you can still ask bms when they're spread out across the country....email or phone calling works.

blegare

Wow ok I think everyone TOTALLY missed the point of this post which was to give me ideas for a DIY project, not to criticize the way I asked my bridesmaids. Somehow this happens every time I ask for advice on a board here...interesting. 

A phone call or an email is great for some people but, for me, this was the way that worked the best.  I'm much better with the written word than the spoken one, especially when it comes to personal, emotional things, and all of my bridesmaids are very busy people that can be tough to get a hold of by phone (including myself). 

mbcdefg

Well, you know, if a whole bunch of people are telling you that your idea is unnecessary, maybe that's true. Unless you believe that everyone's just a critical mean doodie-head who's out to rain on your parade for the fun of it.  

Do what you want, but don't get pissy if everyone doesn't agree with your idea. When you put an idea on a public message board, not everyone is going to agree with it. Doesn't make them mean people. It means that some people would not find a unique/special/whatever contact card to be cute or even necessary.

In all honesty, I have no idea how you would make a contact card "cute." Stickers and construction paper and glitter come to mind, but that's probably not what you're asking for. Make a sticker and ahere it to a bottle of wine, maybe?

suz62984

Put their names on a magnet for the fridge?

blegare

it's fine if you don't think i need to make something nice for them.  i agree it is maybe unnecessary but that doesn't mean it isn't nice.  the thing i take issue with is giving unsolicited advice - i didn't ask for anyone's opinion on how i asked my bridesmaids. 

blegare

ps. this is "cute" http://www.oncewed.com/16446/wedding-blog/diy-wedding/diy-bridesmaids-cards/

frogurt814

My BMs just all friended each other on facebook if they weren't already friends with each other.

Edit:  I didn't suggest they friend each other, they just did it on their own. 

suz62984

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bridesmaid-contact-info?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:8387be3f-b958-44c2-9f8c-0c99b78430b0Post:27010ccb-099d-4111-a6e9-e4368387e5b0">Re: Bridesmaid Contact Info</a>:
[QUOTE]ps. this is "cute"  <a href="http://www.oncewed.com/16446/wedding-blog/diy-wedding/diy-bridesmaids-cards/" rel="nofollow">http://www.oncewed.com/16446/wedding-blog/diy-wedding/diy-bridesmaids-cards/</a>
Posted by blegare[/QUOTE]

Well if you think that's so flippin' cute then what are you asking us for? Just do that. Write their names on the front and contact info on the back. Pretend problem solved.

And buckle up sweetie. This isn't the first time in your life that you have gotten unsolicited advice and it won't be the last.

mbcdefg

But, again, if you post something on a public message board, then it's open for comment. You can't just post something and then demand that people only give you certain kinds of answers.

The more details there are, the more people will comment. So if you feel that something isn't up for discussion, fine, just don't include it then.

stina93446

If you like it so much, use it. I'm not a fan. I would be annoyed that you sent me something that isn't a regular piece of paper. And how often do the bms actually NEED to have these numbers. Again, I would wait until someone says "hey can I have Amy's number?"

emilyinchile

Personally, I don't particularly need or want the phone numbers, mailing addresses and blood types of the other BMs in a friend's wedding. If you send out a group e-mail at any point, they'll all have each other's e-mail addresses, and if they need anything else - like it's easier to organize something over the phone - they can e-mail each other for that information.

I would throw away a piece of paper with your friends' contact info on it because I don't want random papers cluttering up my house (even if they're cute papers), and then I'd just send an e-mail if it turned out I needed any of that information down the line.

suz62984

Sorry frogurt...i'm just a biotch ;P

marinabreeze

I think it's great that you asked your bridesmaids in a cutesy way.  However, there are two issues I think that can come up if you give your bridesmaids contact information in a similar cutesy way. 

The first is burnout.  No one will be as excited about your wedding as you are, and so sending off later information and items for BMs in a cutesy way may end up seeming more and more corny and overdone to them, increasing the chance that they'll become burned out on your wedding.  And then you may end up like many other brides here who later complain that their BMs aren't "interested" in their wedding.

The second, more practical issue is that depending on how you do it, that information may be easier to misplace.  If I get sent a bunch of paper items, I tend to lose them, not because I'm disorganized, but because I am a busy person and paper is not the best medium to keep track of (at least when we're talking about something with contact info).  I may throw things away by accident, file it somewhere and then forget later, etc.  

I also have a similar situation to you in the sense that all my BMs are OOT and spread out in different cities/states.  I lucked out and was able to ask two of them in person, and my MOH I asked over the phone (I wanted to be able to hear her reaction).  When I sent out contact information, I asked each BM's permission individually, and then I FB email messaged them with the info.  That way, they would have at least two different ways of contacting each other, and also, nothing can get "lost" in the mail or kicked to the corner while they live their busy lives. 

If you are just wanting DIY ideas, then there is a DIY board on TK.  If you insist on doing this, it might be best to ask there (or try the magnet idea like PP said).  But you asked on a discussion board...people aren't all going to like your ideas and you can't dictate responses.  The best thing to do is to not take it personally, and at least consider what others are saying before making your own decision.  Believe it or not, we are here to help each other.

Manwaithiel

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bridesmaid-contact-info?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:8387be3f-b958-44c2-9f8c-0c99b78430b0Post:c90119b7-307c-44b2-bc97-3eed4ddb4e50">Re: Bridesmaid Contact Info</a>:
[QUOTE]That's nice that they did that - I don't even think some of mine know who the others are besides in conversations they've had with me. 
Posted by blegare[/QUOTE]

Why does it matter exactly? If you're bridesmaids want to do anything that requires them knowing each other outside the wedding date, they're big people and they'll figure it out or ask you for what they need. Since parties, showers, etc. are all optional, I don't think it's necessary for you to worry yourself about this. Think about other things.

Suz, geeze woman! You need to just chill out =P

stina93446

I love Suz!

mbcdefg

"Discussion Closed"

*facepalm*

Again - PUBLIC MESSAGE BOARD.

mbcdefg

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bridesmaid-contact-info?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:8387be3f-b958-44c2-9f8c-0c99b78430b0Post:731aa302-bc4e-4b93-b0c2-93e8dc017ffc">Re: Bridesmaid Contact Info</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bridesmaid Contact Info :
And buckle up sweetie. This isn't the first time in your life that you have gotten unsolicited advice and it won't be the last.
Posted by suz62984[/QUOTE]

OH yeah. Very good point ... if you're getting this upset over message board posts, OP, then be prepared to flip out on absolutely every single person you come in contact with (friends, family, coworkers, vendors, message board posters, your great uncle twice removed) between now and your wedding day.

If you hate unsolicited advice, then you're going to<strong> hate</strong> being engaged. I'd suggest eloping right this second in that case.

frogurt814

You guys, OP said discussion closed.  We are supposed to stop commenting now!

aerinpegadrak

Sorry, the only person who has the power to close a thread is the mod.  Pretending that you have that power is really not going to endear you to people.

I just sent my girls a couple of group emails, so they had each other's email addresses if they wished.  They weren't all in the same room together until the day of the wedding, which was fine.  They're not a new social group, and they don't have to be.  They're friends with YOU, not necessarily with each other.  I ditto Emily that something like that would probably just get thrown away.  I MIGHT enter their contact info into my address book first, but I probably wouldn't feel the need.

If you want to send them something cutesy, go right ahead, it's your time and money.  But don't be surprised if it doesn't have quite the effect you're hoping for.

Wrkn925

I started scrolling through all the messages after the first few, so please excuse me if I'm repeating someone else.

If you want a cute DIY project, why not put their contact info on a tree graphic.
Make it look like a cute "phone tree." 

trix1223

Sorry.  "cute" for something as basic as an email address baffles me.  And I teach preschool.  I live for cute.  For four year olds.

Personally, I think one group email works just as well as cutesy, and saves your WP time.  If you send something "cute" then they have to transfer the info to their own computer.  A group email, and voila!  They have the contact info without having to physically transfer the info.  From there they can get phone numbers, etc. if they care to.

And I do want to second aerin.  The one thing that everyone has in common is you.  They don't have to be, nor will they likely become a new social group.

I've had one son and one DD married now.  Everyone in both WP's was cordial to each other, and even had fun at the respective weddings.  But once the weddings were over, I know that my DD's haven't ever talked again with my DIL's friends.  And I know that my DIL and younger DD haven't talked with older DD's (bride's) college friends.

Don't read too much into your WP becoming bffs.  And don't get upset when they don't.

mkrupar

I'm re-opening this discussion. :-)

If I'm sent a piece of paper, it goes in the trash, if I get info in an email it's saved and I can find it later and get that info. Logistically, in this day and age I'm sure most people would prefer an email.

eshaufle

Just send an email.

I literally just put:

Hey guys!

FYI...

Girl 1 :  555-5555 something@something.com
Girl 2:   000-0000 somethingelse@something.com

and so on......

They have it if they need it.  If they don't need it then I only wasted 30 seconds of my life typing it out.  I just don't think this type of thing would be appreciated in a "cute" form.

janedoe1113a

Sending an email is a lot easier than sending a piece of paper.  Paper can get lost a lot easier than an email too.

Robyn5298

Blegare - not sure if you're still reading but for what its worth I think the paper dolls are adorable!  That is totally the kind of thing I would do if I had the time or patience. 
That said, I think sending the info electronically as a back up is a good idea.

Do what you want with getting the contact info out - you're not hurting anyone so if you want to make this into a "cutesy" and fun project I say go for it!