Groomsman Rant-sigh

ShyDreamer00

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_groomsman-rant-sigh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:91a3bedd-9334-49d1-b24b-1e5260a722b4Post:e03cb6d6-1db0-4c87-80eb-610c619494df">Re: Groomsman Rant-sigh</a>:
[QUOTE]ShyDreamer - I have NEVER heard of the wedding party sitting with their dates.  EVER.  The wedding party ALWAYS sits with the bride and groom at the head table.  I'm from NE Ohio too.  But I've been to weddings in Pittsburgh too and there is always a head table for just the wedding party. I think you're completely justified in being upset about the situation.  try not to stress TOO much. good luck, I hope it all works out for you!
Posted by aro1589[/QUOTE]

LOL-thanks, I'm glad you can understand where I am coming from regarding this :) I know that the other seating arrangements are done, but it just hasn't been done at any of the other weddings we've attended or in our circles or friends/families (and we've attended 3 in the past year and guest lists were over 150 for each one).
I will try some of the other suggestions, you ladies have given (thank you) and tell him that it is considered rude (once again, lol). So I'll see how far that gets me :) Thank you!

Maggie0829

Anyone else getting tired of OP LOLing at everything?  Makes me wonder if she is actually laughing as she is writing her posts, most of which do not seem all that funny.

Just because certain seating has not been done at any wedding you have attended doesn't mean that you can't start a new tradition.  It would make your wedding unique and different then anyone elses you have been to.

As for the tux, like a PP said, all of our GMs paid off their remaining balances when they picked their tuxes up one or two days prior to our wedding.  It never even crossed my mind to hound them to pay for it in full way in advance.  Since it is their money I have no say as to how they spend it, I just trusted that they would pay and pick up their tuxes on time.

Ali092011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_groomsman-rant-sigh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:91a3bedd-9334-49d1-b24b-1e5260a722b4Post:fbfd63a2-51dd-489f-99ba-ea3d62f3663b">Re: Groomsman Rant-sigh</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Groomsman Rant-sigh : Actually the only financial information that I put out there originally was that my parents were paying for the wedding. You assumed that we were therefore able to pay for other things when the truth is that they are paying for it because we can't afford to pay for most of it. This was something that they had planned for. I just corrected you as I've been corrected so many times on here....thank you for your input.
Posted by ShyDreamer00[/QUOTE]

I'm sorry. I just have to chime in here. What you actually said was:

[QUOTE]Now, I understand money issues-we have them too...if we could help him out paying for it, then we would (my parents are paying for<strong> the wedding and everything associated with it</strong>, except the rehearsal dinner).
Posted by ShyDreamer00[/QUOTE]

Then, when Joy called you out on it, suddenly you're paying for the tux, BP gifts, alcohol, etc.

I'm sorry, but it really bugs me when people get upset about reactions to information that <em>they chose</em> to provide.

kaos16

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_groomsman-rant-sigh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:91a3bedd-9334-49d1-b24b-1e5260a722b4Post:b4d11990-728f-414c-bc00-bd54e1599984">Re: Groomsman Rant-sigh</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Groomsman Rant-sigh : I'm sorry. I just have to chime in here. What you actually said was: Then, when Joy called you out on it, suddenly you're paying for the tux, BP gifts, alcohol, etc. I'm sorry, but it really bugs me when people get upset about reactions to information that they chose to provide.
Posted by Ali092011[/QUOTE]

So i'm not the only one who noticed that OP was conveniently adding information as the thread goes on to try to validate her position?

Ali092011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_groomsman-rant-sigh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:91a3bedd-9334-49d1-b24b-1e5260a722b4Post:2ea72154-1aa2-44c3-8b3f-384b24c2ea95">Re: Groomsman Rant-sigh</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Groomsman Rant-sigh : So i'm not the only one who noticed that OP was conveniently adding information as the thread goes on to try to validate her position?
Posted by kaos16[/QUOTE]

You're definitely not the only one.

OP, I still just don't get what the big deal is about the whole situation.

aerinpegadrak

Why is the head table the only option?  Will your venue not just remove the head table and seat you at smaller tables?  You're the client, they need to be willing to work with you on it, not just tell you, "Well, this is how it's going to be."

You should remind your FI that he's not going to be able to talk to any of his groomsmen at dinner.  A Last Supper style table means that he's only going to be able to talk to you and whomever is sitting on his other side.  If he really wants a chance for quality bonding time with them, this is a terrible way to go about it.  It won't turn out the way he thinks it will.

AdeleDazeem

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_groomsman-rant-sigh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:91a3bedd-9334-49d1-b24b-1e5260a722b4Post:b4d11990-728f-414c-bc00-bd54e1599984">Re: Groomsman Rant-sigh</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Groomsman Rant-sigh : I'm sorry. I just have to chime in here. What you actually said was: Then, when Joy called you out on it, suddenly you're paying for the tux, BP gifts, alcohol, etc. I'm sorry, but it really bugs me when people get upset about reactions to information that they chose to provide.
Posted by Ali092011[/QUOTE]

This is why I didn't say any more.  Originally she's paying for nothing, but can't help the groomsmen.  Now she's paying for a crap ton of stuff and can't help the groomsman.  I am also wrong for making a judgmental call on her own financial situation after she offered up the details. 

I can't even get into the logistics of the head table/kicking out the groomsman because she has already dug herself in a hole that I'd rather not deal with.  There's just too much wrong with this post.

amymaysa

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_groomsman-rant-sigh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:91a3bedd-9334-49d1-b24b-1e5260a722b4Post:0b6901a1-9b74-408c-8095-3367c510202d">Re: Groomsman Rant-sigh</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>Anyone else getting tired of OP LOLing at everything?</strong>  Makes me wonder if she is actually laughing as she is writing her posts, most of which do not seem all that funny. Just because certain seating has not been done at any wedding you have attended doesn't mean that you can't start a new tradition.  It would make your wedding unique and different then anyone elses you have been to. As for the tux, like a PP said, all of our GMs paid off their remaining balances when they picked their tuxes up one or two days prior to our wedding.  It never even crossed my mind to hound them to pay for it in full way in advance.  Since it is their money I have no say as to how they spend it, I just trusted that they would pay and pick up their tuxes on time.
Posted by Maggie0829[/QUOTE]

Yes, I was reading this, saying, stop LOLing...my god!

amyb140

All this over $60???  I'll send you $60 if you'll just shut up about it.  Geez.  

erbear84

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_groomsman-rant-sigh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:91a3bedd-9334-49d1-b24b-1e5260a722b4Post:e03cb6d6-1db0-4c87-80eb-610c619494df">Re: Groomsman Rant-sigh</a>:
[QUOTE]ShyDreamer - I have NEVER heard of the wedding party sitting with their dates.  EVER.  The wedding party ALWAYS sits with the bride and groom at the head table.  I'm from NE Ohio too.  <strong>But I've been to weddings in Pittsburgh too and there is always a head table for just the wedding party. </strong>I think you're completely justified in being upset about the situation.  try not to stress TOO much. good luck, I hope it all works out for you!
Posted by aro1589[/QUOTE]

Say what?  Maybe when my siblings got married in 89 and 91 but I haven't seen a WP head table since then.  Don't lump Pittsburgh into this because that's just not true/common.

aragx6

I can't imagine your FI having an issue with a King's Table in the middle of the room: http://blog.weddingsmadesplendid.com/2010/04/wedding-trend-kings-table.html

ajmom2two

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_groomsman-rant-sigh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:91a3bedd-9334-49d1-b24b-1e5260a722b4Post:256427a5-f63a-4dd7-8375-5df613ecfc91">Re: Groomsman Rant-sigh</a>:
[QUOTE]I can't imagine your FI having an issue with a King's Table in the middle of the room: <a href="http://blog.weddingsmadesplendid.com/2010/04/wedding-trend-kings-table.html" rel="nofollow">http://blog.weddingsmadesplendid.com/2010/04/wedding-trend-kings-table.html</a>
Posted by aragx6[/QUOTE]

<div>The perfect solution...and it even has a name that should make your FI feel special.</div>

ShyDreamer00

Thank you for the King's Table idea-I really like that one! I'll definitely try suggesting that idea and see if the hall can accommodate.
I apologize if my "LOL" got to some you reading my post-its how I am and how I type. If you don't like it, don't read it-plain and simple.
Once again, thank you to those who gave helpful and constructive advice! I did realize I was being a bridezilla about the whole tux thing and I put that in one of my posts awhile back, but its ok that some of you continue to harp on it-I get the point
I didn't include everything that we are paying for because I really didn't think our financial status would come that much into question, I just originally thought I would put it out there that we are struggling too. The OP wasn't the only one who brought it up either. Just because my parents are the traditional type where they believe they should pay for a majority of the wedding doesn't mean we aren't still struggling on our own.
I don't think I'll post on the boards anymore, but just go back to lurking as it seems I tend to offend a great many of you-LOL!