Vent: MOH

chelley599

I just need to vent and the FI tries to listen but he just doesn't get it.   So, a few months ago, my bridal party minus the MOH (my siste3r) went to david's bridal to pick their dresses.  She didn't want to go with everyone.  So. I have been asking her to go and finally we made plans for March 7th.  I made the appt and then she needed to change it to the 6th.  I called DB back and changed it.  Anyway, then the other day, she asks if we can go this Sunday instead.  I am annoyed at this point but agree so I call DB a third time.  I was apologzing liek crazy.  Well, the saga continues.  She tells me Friday night that she ended up having to work Sunday morning so she may be a few minutes late (no biggie I can look for the dresses and pull some).  Then yesterday it was 15 minutes late.  A little tougher but doable.  Now, I get a text at 11:15 that it is more like a half hour.  At this point I am fuming....I have things to do and DB is a business and weekends are very crowded.  I called DB a 4th time in less than a week and asked to either change it.  Luckily there is a 1:00 cancellation so we are goig at 1:00.  I just need to vent because I feel like dress shopping is a major inconvenience to her.  I changed it to this weekend to help her out.  Am I wrong to be annoyed or upset with her?  If I act annoyed, it will turn into a big fight because she is very self-centered and she honestly thinks the world revolves around her.  She calls her birthday a national holiday.  I called my dad crying because I was just so annoyed that I wanted to scream.  Ok, I have to take a deep breath now and just let it go.  We have an appt. and it is not worth the added stress.  Thanks for listening.

stina93446

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_vent-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:9462033b-aa64-4d36-b225-9fc85a88f97dPost:d7106709-f069-48d8-a6b3-d00e717ea5aa">Vent: MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]I just need to vent and the FI tries to listen but he just doesn't get it.   So, a few months ago, my bridal party minus the MOH (my siste3r) went to david's bridal to pick their dresses.  She didn't want to go with everyone.  So. I have been asking her to go and finally we made plans for March 7th.  I made the appt and then she needed to change it to the 6th.  I called DB back and changed it.  Anyway, then the other day, she asks if we can go this Sunday instead.  I am annoyed at this point but agree so I call DB a third time.  I was apologzing liek crazy.  Well, the saga continues.  She tells me Friday night that she ended up having to work Sunday morning so she may be a few minutes late (no biggie I can look for the dresses and pull some).  Then yesterday it was 15 minutes late.  A little tougher but doable.  Now, I get a text at 11:15 that it is more like a half hour.  At this point I am fuming....I have things to do and DB is a business and weekends are very crowded.  I called DB a 4th time in less than a week and asked to either change it.  Luckily there is a 1:00 cancellation so we are goig at 1:00.  I just need to vent because I feel like dress shopping is a major inconvenience to her.  I changed it to this weekend to help her out.  Am I wrong to be annoyed or upset with her?  If I act annoyed, it will turn into a big fight because she is very self-centered and she honestly thinks the world revolves around her.  She calls her birthday a national holiday.  I called my dad crying because I was just so annoyed that I wanted to scream.  Ok, I have to take a deep breath now and just let it go.  We have an appt. and it is not worth the added stress.  Thanks for listening.
Posted by chelley599[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Why do you have to go with her? If you already know which dress it is, just give her the info and have her do it on her own time. If you're calling and calling to get this done with her and she doesn't have the time, move onto something else. Her job is more important to her than your wedding because lets face it, her job is something that hopefully she'll have after your wedding and she actually makes money from it. </div><div>
</div><div>Just take a step back, give her the info and wipe your hands. It's not your problem after you give her the 411. (And if you haven't picked out a dress, just tell her to take pictures)

</div>

stina93446

Plus your wedding is in 7 months. Most DB stores do not take that long to get the dress business done. So just back off of her. 

gottahavashorti

Tell her the dress color, along with any other criteria you had for your other bridesmaids like length or fabric, and let her go on her own time.  You were accommodating, she's been flaky, so stop trying to shift your schedule and the appointment if she's just going to have you change it.

Also, it only takes maybe 2-3 months for DB dresses to come in, even salon dresses probably woudln't need to be ordered 7 months in advance.  She could wait a few more months to order and be okay.

megk8oz

I used David's for my wedding, we didn't order BM dresses until I was 4 months out.

I also didn't need an appointment with them for anything aside from fittings. Actual shopping I was able to just walk in and do my thing. My mom and I went once and looked around. Then a few weeks later I went back with the girls. We never had an appointment, we just showed up, and we had no problems getting assistance.

If you already have a dress, then she just needs to order it, you don't need to be there for that. If you go to David's without her and pick something, they put it in the computer so she can't make changes if she goes later without you. If you pick 2 or 3 (And you're giving her a choice between them), they do the same thing: log your choices, and when she comes in, they pull them for her.

You're 7 months out. Take a deep breath. Don't stress over this. Your sister will not show up "naked" to your wedding.

chelley599

Thanks....I know david's Bridal is quick.  I did forget to mention that she is leaving in a month to study in Japan (where mom lives) until just before the wedding so really this is it..  We don't have a dress picked out yet and she wants me to go with her because she admits to having no taste. 

SarahPLiz

Dress shopping IS probably an inconvenience for her. Its probably not how she wants to spend her afternoon, but she's doing it because she loves you. Try not to be annoyed.

gottahavashorti

Can she go on her own, take pictures of the dresses she likes and have you help her make a decision?  It sounds like she'll probably just keep on switching the date and time of the appointments.  That, or sometime when you're free, she can grab you and take you to DB without an appointment.

Arther007

I think you both need to take a deep breath, Have fun today with your sister.