Bridesmaid Dresses

latourelle83

All of my BM except for one are out of town.  I have measurements for 3 of them but I have asked the other 2 to send me their measurements and neither have responded!  I'm just wondering how you go about collecting the money to order the dresses and get their measurements without sounding rude.  Should I pay for the dresses and just have them pay me back?  I don't like asking for money.

mbcdefg

Did you ask them their budgets beforehand, prior to selecting the dress? Or did you just say something along the lines of, "The dress will be $x so give me the money"?

If you didn't ask them their budgets, then maybe they're not paying you because they're not comfortable with the cost. If this is the case, I would call each of them, apologize for not asking them for a price quote before you picked the dress, then ask them to honestly tell you if they're O.K. with the price. If not, either pick a cheaper dress or kick in the difference yourself to make up for it.

But if you DID ask their budgets ahead of time, and they've all agreed that they're fine with the cost and they like the dress ... did you set a deadline? You still have a LOT of time until your July wedding, so honestly I would wait until after the holidays are over and then touch base with them. It can be hard to come up with money at this time of year, when gifts need to be bought and a lot of people need to travel.

After the holidays, call them and say, "Hey, we're getting ready to order the dresses soon, and I need your measurements and the $x for the dress. If this is a problem for you, let me know and we'll work something out. Otherwise, I need the measurements and the money by [date]."

If you want to front them the money, that's up to you. But be prepared to possibly not get that money back. Money can be a VERY sticky topic between friends and can even ruin some friendships. Only front them the money if you are 100% prepared to possibly never be paid back for some/all of it. If they say they'll pay you back, agree to a deadline date or a payment plan, and possibly get it in writing (maybe via e-mail).

MyNameIsNot

Assuming they are all happy with the price and style of the dress, let them order it themselves.  Designers are available at a variety of shops all over the country, and even online.  Let them handle ordering it in their own city.  That way they deal with the payment and all the alterations stuff and you don't have to worry about it.

aerinpegadrak

The holidays are crazy for most people.  We decided at the beginning of November that we weren't going to pester anyone about any wedding stuff until after New Year's.  Once the holidays are over and everyone has settled down, then I'll touch base with my attendants to find out where they stand on dresses and various vendors to get things nailed down.  But especially as it gets closer to Christmas, I'm not expecting anyone to have my wedding at the forefront of their mind.  Hell, it's hardly at the forefront of my own mind, and I'm four months out.

MyNameIsNot is right, just let them order it themselves.  If you're getting them all at a local store for a discount, then they can still be responsible for calling the store and providing them with their measurements and payment information.  Just give them the deadline and let them take care of it.  They're adults, they'll manage.

banana468

Can they just call the shop with their measurements by a certain date?

FWIW, unless there's a dire need to get stuff ordered right now, this just isn't the week to ask people to do wedding stuff.  Wait until after the holidays when things have mellowed out a bit.

gottahavashorti

I'm having the same issue.  We are ordering from Pearl's Place, so they have to be called in together or shipping costs increase.  We agreed on a late November deadline but that didn't happen and we do need to order by the end of December based on their approximate arrival dates.  I was hoping to avoid that due to finals and holidays, but oh well.

The way I figure, if anyone doesn't get their measurements and money to me by the time we need to order, they may be able to order from a local shop and have it arrive in time.