Always, Always A Bridesmaid

slgirl21

HI All!

A friend from college is getting married and I'm really happy and excited for her!

Here's the thing she'swrote me an email asking me to be part of her wedding as a bridesmaid...we were really close in college then went our separate ways, she lives in another state and we reconnected through FB. I've been a bridesmaid 9 times now and I love the role and being there for my friends on there big day, but over the course of being a bridesmaid I know how expensive it all can be and since she lives in another state , I then have to pay for travel expenses, and I currently work 7 days a week working  too part time jobs that pay just alittle bit more then minium wage, I can barely pay for my mortage, let alone any other bills I need to pay how do I politely say no and just be a guest at the wedding without hurting her feels.

msuprincess04

Just tell her that while you are honored and touched that she thought of you, you are just unavailable to be a bridesmaid and would rather be a guest. If you want to, and you in no way need to, you can tell her time and money are tight right now and prevent it. 

Either way just make a big fuss that you can't wait to share her special day as a guest and you are so excited for her.

Shellipuppy

I agree w/msuprincess, if you an't afford it, just be honest with her. Let her know how special it makes you feel but at this time it's just not possible.
I actually wish one of my maids had done that b/c right now I am picking up slack i didn't expect too.

On another note, i thought i was one of the few that had been a bridesmaid that many times. My number is 10 & actually a huge joke in my group of friends. I have storage tubs full of dresses.

slgirl21

Thanks Girls for the advice. I think she would understand because she knows what I'm sorta going through, not all in detail.

Shellipuppy.... I only kept one of my dresses because I can re wear it, its more like a cocktail dress, but the other dresses I donated to a charity in my area called Beccas Closet, its for girls you can not afford prom dresses and I had alot...i felt like Katherine Heigle in 27 dresses!

eureka30030

We are in the same situation, I moved out of state after college but I would really like my old roomie to be in the wedding party. However, I am totally preparing myself for her to say no due to financial reasons. If this were the case I would 100% understand, my feelings wouldn't be hurt at all- I know what's it like to have to skip out on something important to you because of lack of funds. This being said, If she did decline due to finances, I agree with stagemanager14- I would work my hardest to make it affordable for her, and try to make her only out of pocket costs the travel itself...