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Advice Needing on Picking Bridesmaids

smileybridgetsmileybridget member
First Comment
in Wedding Party
I am trying to pick my bridesmaids, but I really want to only pick friends that would actually like to be bridesmaids. I know it is a financial drain and I know my friends will say yes even if it is not ideal for them. Any ways to figure out if they want to be in it?
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Re: Advice Needing on Picking Bridesmaids

  • Licia&WayneLicia&Wayne
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    edited April 2010
    Pick those that you can't imagine getting married without them standing next to you.

    ETA: If they don't want to be in your wedding, don't pressure them to be in it. Make sure that when you ask them they know you're completely okay with them saying no. But I have to say, picking friends because they want to be in your wedding rather than the friends you are closest to and giving them a chance to say yes or no is a bad criteria to choose on.
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  • Licia&WayneLicia&Wayne
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    oh, and you double posted.
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  • CellesCelles member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_advice-needing-picking-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:bd40e621-262f-430b-b8e1-4239c821c9abPost:e825f3e7-e495-47d0-80bf-3b05d4442073">Advice Needing on Picking Bridesmaids</a>:
    [QUOTE]I am trying to pick my bridesmaids, but I really want to only pick friends that would actually like to be bridesmaids. I know it is a financial drain and I know my friends will say yes even if it is not ideal for them. Any ways to figure out if they want to be in it?
    Posted by smileybridget[/QUOTE]

    Ask them, and trust them to be honest with you if it would cause a hardship. You really can't make assumptions about other people's finances without running the risk of insulting them. 

    Side note: being a bridesmaid doesn't have to be expensive. I've seen plenty of lovely weddings in which the bridesmaids did their own hair and make up and wore dresses they already owned.  Bridesmaids don't have to match the tablecloths, nor are they obligated to splurge on showers and bachelorettes.  Those are all nice-to-haves, not need-to-haves. 

    Good luck. :)
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  • smileybridgetsmileybridget member
    First Comment
    Thanks! That is a good point!!
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