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    This sounds like it's over much more then unmatching shoes, and pain in the butt wedding invitations.

    Though to address one issue, do not dictate that they have matching shoes...especially when there is a very obvious difference in sizes....I can understand wanting a uniformed look, but noone is really going to be paying attention to her shoes. Could you have found something in a matching color that looked similar perhaps? Otherwise you'd have 2 smiling bridesmaids in your pictures and one that is grimacing the whole time from being miserable and in pain. She might not have thought about it herself until after the others picked their shoes.

     But as far as the rest of the stuff goes, it doesn't sound like you actually like your friend anyway.Your opinion of her is very poor. And if she has gone as far as deleted you from her facebook and isn't talking about you and just saying mean things...well, you might not have to worry about kicking her out (not that you should) she probably has removed herself.

    There was much more leading up to this, and it might not be about you directly at all..but perhaps you're not as easy going as you think you are. I don't mean that as a slight, but wedding planning can be stressful...so maybe you haven't been your normal laid back self. Or perhaps she's been hearing things brought up about or has picked up on your low opinion of her in the first place.

    There was a better way of handling her not coming to your FI party. She felt bad I'm sure when you called her out...and it sounds like both of you have handled things wrong at that point and all along the way.

     In any event, I'm very sorry. Fights with friends are always hard and stressful, stuff happens. You might have an uneven wedding party and you need to decide if this is a friendship you want to try to maintain or if you want to just be done with it. Either you attempt to reach out to her and make amends and apologize for whatever roll you might have played in hurting her feelings..or just be done with it. If she shoes up to the wedding, she shows up. Just enjoy your day.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-drama-5-weeks-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:d47e2e13-7568-468e-be14-4bd5bc3835e1Post:4b1dce06-4861-4c19-a149-1c79b76d6f77">Re: MOH drama 5 weeks before wedding!</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong><em>IThey are getting diamond necklaces as gifts, so please don't act as if I'm being some little complaining Bridezilla over here.</em></strong>  You could not have things more backwards.  I don't think a pair of shoes is something to lose your cool over, and if you were a little more perceptive, maybe you would have noticed that the point of the story was not about a pair of shoes, but about the lack of communication in regards to them.  My FI and I are spending a lot of time and money for this occassion and if I want my bridesmaids to wear a pair of CLEAN shoes, I am absolutely going to voice that and any other concerns I have.  :-)
    Posted by Kek123[/QUOTE]

    Sorry, but that ship has left the dock.  You are so overthinking this.

    Your MOH and WP shouldn't have to get matching shoes.  If you require it, you pay for them.

    You were snotty to your MOH about your FI's party.  Sure you think it was a fabulous party, but an invitation to a party is NOT a subpoena.  Your MOH was not obligated to attend.

    You are really overreacting to her actions.  A word of advice:  you can't control what other people do.  You can only control how you react to what they do.

    And you're overreacting. 
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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    I'm not going to touch the shoe issue.

    But, why are you two friends?  If she's mean, abrasive, always wants to be the center of attention, asked her way into your bridal party, and all the other things you wrote up there...?

    If you truly are friends, you'll want to work it out.  Cool off for a few days.  Think of her as your friend and not your MOH.  Put yourself in her shoes (hmm...bad choice of word) ... skin!  And then try to have a rational discussion with her.

    Kicking someone out of your wedding a friendship ending move - do you really want to go there?
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-drama-5-weeks-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d47e2e13-7568-468e-be14-4bd5bc3835e1Post:4b1dce06-4861-4c19-a149-1c79b76d6f77">Re: MOH drama 5 weeks before wedding!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I should have stated that we are going for a 1940's look.  The entire BP is wearing spectators.  The Groomsmen will have nice rented ones, and the other two bridesmaids will have brand new shoes (less than $30 for the pair).  I'm all about doing this on a budget.  I work for a salon, so all of their hair/ makeup/ nails needs are taken care of.  I've spent so much time thinking about everyone else, and making everything nice, convenient and affordable for them.  They are getting diamond necklaces as gifts, so please don't act as if I'm being some little complaining Bridezilla over here.  You could not have things more backwards.  I don't think a pair of shoes is something to lose your cool over, and if you were a little more perceptive, maybe you would have noticed that the point of the story was not about a pair of shoes, but about the lack of communication in regards to them.  My FI and I are spending a lot of time and money for this occassion and if I want my bridesmaids to wear a pair of CLEAN shoes, I am absolutely going to voice that and any other concerns I have.  :-)
    Posted by Kek123[/QUOTE]

    Going for a look is great. But requiring shoes means you have to pay for them, and it means you have to find something that all of your BMs are comfortable in. Let her wear a pair of plain black shoes. If anyone notices (and they won't, but just in case), they'll just think she's being different because she's MOH.

    Buying them an expensive gift does not necessarily mean you're not a bridezilla. It just means you are able to afford an expensive gift. Good for you.

    Honestly, it sounds like you and your MOH are only still friends because of your history. It doesn't sound like either of you particularly loves the other - both from her unfair blow-up (if she volunteered to do the invitations, she shouldn't complain) and from how you write about her hear. Work on your friendship or let it fizzle out naturally, but don't focus on shoes or make this about your wedding.
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    if you want to salvage the relationship try to call her.

    Sounds like to me though you don't even like her so i wouldn't call her, or pick up her dress and just assume she's not coming to the wedding.
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    I get the feeling you made a big issue over the shoes... $30 for Shoes, $80 for dress plus accessories, showers plus gifts, transport, accommodation etc, it adds up to a lot, it might not seem like it to you because you are looking at it relative to what you are spending but to anyone who has to find that sort of money, believe me it's a lot and people often resent the high cost, especially if she feels that you aren't very grateful for the effort she has put in.  This I think you should apologise to her for.

    That said, If she's as big an a$$ as you've made her out to be (Facebook arguements, ditching the party for a better offer) then you probably don't need to fire her from the WP, I can't see her just turning up.

    Don't try and replace her last minute just go with the two bridesmaids you have.
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    1. The shoe issue was rediculous - if someone can't wear the "required" shoes due to the fact she needs a wide width, be sensitive to that and work with your friend - as in, allow her to find her own shoes to wear that are comfortable.

    2. If your abrasive, mean friend shoved her way into the MOH position that's on you for not putting your foot down and nipping that in the bud long ago. You let her assume she's got the role and therefore she went with it.

    3. It is unfortunate that she offered to do your invites and then it turned out to be something to complain about...sucky. But not much you can do about that now, aside from find new ones if need be.

    4. Just b/c you threw FI the  Birthday Party of the Century doesn't mean she HAD to attend. Time to let that one go - yes, it was disappointing she didn't attend the party YOU threw but she made her choice.

    5. Don't replace her in the WP if she has backed out - naming your infant daughter MOH would just be bizarre in my opinion anyway.

    It doesn't sound like you really value this friendship very much, but if you do...then now is the time to try to work things out. Leave the wedding out of it and work on your friendship. If she's blocked you on FB, pick up the phone and try calling. Or send her a letter or an email. If you don't hear from her, figure she's chosen not to participate in the wedding.
    If you have no desire to reconcile your friendship then just drop it and let it go - no further action required.

    The Bump ate my signature. DD - Apr 2011 DS - expected June 2013
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-drama-5-weeks-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:d47e2e13-7568-468e-be14-4bd5bc3835e1Post:4b1dce06-4861-4c19-a149-1c79b76d6f77">Re: MOH drama 5 weeks before wedding!</a>:
    [QUOTE]They are getting diamond necklaces as gifts, so please don't act as if I'm being some little complaining Bridezilla over here.  You could not have things more backwards. 
    Posted by Kek123[/QUOTE]

    How is this a valid justification? "I'm giving you a diamond necklace so nothing I do is wrong"? How about you skip the diamond necklace and buy her the stupid shoes if you want them so badly?


    [QUOTE]I don't think a pair of shoes is something to lose your cool over, and if you were a little more perceptive, maybe you would have noticed that the point of the story was not about a pair of shoes, but about the lack of communication in regards to them. 
    Posted by Kek123[/QUOTE]

    Why mention the shoes, then, if it's not a big deal?

    I also don't see what the lack of communication is here. "Buy these shoes." "I don't want to." That's not a lack of communication ... that's you telling her to spend her money on something she doesn't want.

    [QUOTE]My FI and I are spending a lot of time and money for this occassion and if I want my bridesmaids to wear a pair of CLEAN shoes, I am absolutely going to voice that and any other concerns I have.  :-)
    Posted by Kek123[/QUOTE]

    So then ask her to wear a pair of clean shoes. Done and done.

    I think you're trying to get blood from a turnip here. She doesn't seem like a cooperative person, yet you let her be a bridesmaid anyway and now you're complaining that she's not cooperative. DUH. Either deal with it, or kick her out and don't be her friend anymore (and be prepared for a possible fight, and also for mutual friends to look down upon you for kicking someone out of your wedding).

    And again, the diamond necklace doesn't give you carte blanche to ask for whatever you want from your BMs. And if the most vocal one is complaining about the shoes, then I'd be willing to bet that the more polite ones might also be unhappy with them but are keeping their mouths shut (to your face, anyway, who knows what's being said behind your back).
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-drama-5-weeks-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d47e2e13-7568-468e-be14-4bd5bc3835e1Post:ada34b18-f477-4217-ab08-e49f66735dbf">Re: MOH drama 5 weeks before wedding!</a>:
    [QUOTE]naming your infant daughter MOH would just be bizarre in my opinion anyway.
    Posted by CTGirl30[/QUOTE]

    Wow, totally missed that in the OP (I was skimming by the end). I would definitely find it weird to be at a wedding where a toddler is MOH.
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    First, I think it is a great idea to name your daughter the MOH, if need be. There is a sentiment there and it will be something you can all look back on. Our son will be ring bearer and honorary BM. Maybe its a crazy parent thing but I don't see why that is weird at all.

    My suggestion is to go ahead with your day. While the shoe detail was a little much, both of your reactions to little details blew this way up! I had a similar incident when planning my baby shower (a year later now we are friends again) But it stemmed from underlying frustration, which this sounds like. Plus, it sounds like she may not be a good friend to begin with, although you have been friends for 10 years sometimes you have to realize when its time to move on. We have friends for reasons and seasons and it sounds like her season is over!

    Do not stress about her or the number in your party or who will actually have the MOH title, these are all tiny factors in the big picture of your marriage...of your day together.

    Good Luck!
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    I can't believe how you describe your so-called friend and maid of honor!  WOW, you don't even like this person.  I think all of this is your fault for choosing her as the maid of honor.  Get on with your wedding, and if she isn't there, she isn't there.  You don't need to have a MOH. 
    Married 4/30/11
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    Ok, so if I follow some people's reasoning on here if you want your WP to wear certain matching shoes the bride should pay for them. So it stands to reason that if you want your WP to wear certain matching DRESSES the bride should pay for those too? Part of being in the wedding is paying for things (shoes, dresses, shower, bach party, etc). I'm not making my girls wear matching shoes, but I have given them guidelines, and I WILL be checking all of them to make sure I approve. I don't blame her for not wanting her MOH to show up in scroungy shoes. And everyone on here knows they'd be upset if their MOH did that so don't even lie.

    As for the rest of it, I say ditch the dysfunctional-frenemy relationship with her. It's not healthy and its not what a friendship should be. I would call her, make it clear she is NOT to show up at the wedding, and then make your daughter your MOH. My daughter and son from my first marriage are going to be our MOH and Best man. I don't think it's weird. Its your wedding, no one elses. Enjoy your day!
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    Ok my 2 cents-

    I'm not touching the shoe issue.  By now you've gotten the message loud and clear.

    She's rude, she's abrasive, she embarasses you in public and takes advantage of your FI's generosity and hospitality?  She also encourages you to throw FI a big birthday party, tells you she's coming for the last 2 months, then you find out the day before, via facebook, that she's ditching?  As in, she can't even tell you herself, you find out via status feed?  Hmm... I'm not sure I would be friends with this person any longer.  And for the record, I do feel you were within your right to ask her about it.  If someone said they were coming to a gathering I was throwing, and I saw they had double-booked themselves, yes, I'd ask about it.  You said it was a polite email.  Why is that wrong?

    Your issue isn't the wedding.  Forget the wedding.  You don't need a MOH.  I don't have one, it's not a big deal.  Your problem is you have a friendship that has run its course, and it's probably past time to let it die naturally.

    If what you've told us is the whole story, I don't think you have anything to apologize to this girl for.  Seems as though you've acted rationally and calmly, while she's been flying off the handle and starting juvenile facebook fights.  Just let it go
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-drama-5-weeks-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d47e2e13-7568-468e-be14-4bd5bc3835e1Post:40ede627-9316-4ca8-b8ce-fb5782e35b1b">Re: MOH drama 5 weeks before wedding!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Ok, so if I follow some people's reasoning on here if you want your WP to wear certain matching shoes the bride should pay for them. So it stands to reason that if you want your WP to wear certain matching DRESSES the bride should pay for those too? Part of being in the wedding is paying for things (shoes, dresses, shower, bach party, etc). I'm not making my girls wear matching shoes, but I have given them guidelines, and I WILL be checking all of them to make sure I approve. I don't blame her for not wanting her MOH to show up in scroungy shoes. And everyone on here knows they'd be upset if their MOH did that so don't even lie.
    Posted by tenglehart[/QUOTE]

    No. BMs buy a dress that is within their budget (you should ask before picking a dress). I happen to think that IF everyone is ok with a certain pair of shoes, and dress + shoes is less than that original budget, it's ok to get matching shoes, although I also think it's overkill. Shoes are also different than dresses in that some people can't wear high heels for medical reasons, or things like this case where the MOH needs wide shoes. No one is saying the MOH should come in dirty shoes. Just that OP doesn't need to freak out and force her to buy specific shoes.

    And in no way shape or form are BMs obligated to throw or pay for pre-wedding parties. Yes, most people probably do because they want to do nice things for their friends, but it's not a requirement. The dress and any costs of getting to the wedding are a BM's only financial obligations, everything else is extra.
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    When I agree to be a BM, I am agreeing to buy a dress that I may not have picked out myself.  I am not agreeing to buy the matching accessories dictated by the bride.  
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    I'm pretty sure everyone on here didn't get the point of the story. She was not requiring a certain shoe, just that they had to be the same. The bridesmaids picked the shoes (which I'm assuming includes the MOH) and the MOH never said anything about them needing to be wide. You guys all suck. If you are going to respond to something, at least understand what the person needs help with. People go on here for advice, not to be ripped into. Obviously this girl is really hurting over this issue. Regardless whether or not you think it's valid, you need to be considerate of people's feelings.
    Kek123: I'm sorry you had to go through all this. It sounds like your MOH is the MOH from hell. In retrospect, you shouldn't have had her be in the wedding party to begin with, but I'm sure you already know that. Now, for what you should do to fix the problem. I say call her up, and if she doesn't answer leave her a nice message saying that due to the recent issues you would not like her to be in the wedding party any longer. Don't go pick up her dress. Think about who you would have picked for your MOH had she not offered so rudely. If you want, ask that person to take over the duties (basically at this point she'd just give a toast if she wants and walk with the Best Man) or just stay with 2 bridesmaids. It will be fine. Lastly, breathe deep, let it go, and enjoy your wedding day! 
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-drama-5-weeks-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d47e2e13-7568-468e-be14-4bd5bc3835e1Post:694c915f-61af-42b7-9d41-b4313edaf08a">Re: MOH drama 5 weeks before wedding!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'll take my hormonal pregnant moms opinions over at I-A-P than to take my chances with crappy, shallow advice from anyone on here.  Thanks anyways, and I wish all your soon-to-be hubbys GOOD LUCK!!  They certainly will have their hands full!!
    Posted by Kek123[/QUOTE]

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    edited February 2010
    Also, I do think this is a case of you made your bed now lie in it. The relationship between you and your MOH sounds really terrible. I can't imagine that after a temper tantrum of the proportions you describe your MOH would show up to the wedding. If she does, well, grin and bear it.

    If she decides not to be in the wedding, I wouldn't replace her, not even with my daughter. Something just rings wrong about that, though I'm not sure what it is. Maybe because she's still a baby.

    Good luck with this, but I would definitely ditch the bad relationship ASAP.
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    Kiki - I'm pretty sure everyone DID get the point of the story. 

    Shoes aside,  if OP doesn't know what to do regarding the MOH issue, plenty of people (myself included) suggested trying to contact the friend to discuss the issues affecting the friendship (if OP wants to salvage the friendship...it doesn't seem clear). If she's not interested in resolving the friendship, then let it go and move on with the wedding plans as if this girl is not participating b/c it seems pretty clear she's not interested in keeping up contact with the OP.

    Your advice to replace the MOH in the OP's wedding party is a bit misquided...and replacing members of the WP who have stepped down is generally advised against on this board. What would the replacement girl think? That she wasn't good enough to be asked months ago and is now a "spot filler"? MOH is typically a position of honor - one that you ask the person closest to you if they would accept. Unfortunately that's not what happened in the OP's case originally...which probably led to alot of the drama that ensued...

    A MOH is not even necessary - the OP can still have a perfectly lovely wedding with the remaining BMs.
    The Bump ate my signature. DD - Apr 2011 DS - expected June 2013
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    YOU are the one who chose some girl that you obviously hate as your MOH.  what did you expect?
    Married 4/30/11
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    It sounds like you are two self-centered hot heads, constantly over reacting to evey little slight. You shouldn't have insisted that she try to shove her wide feet into shoes that won't fit, or sent the e-mail about the birthday party. She shouldn't have posted insulting remarks about you on fb. I don't see a single positive thing abou this friendship, if you could call it that.
    'Firing' her from the MOH position would be very rude, but apparently that is how you deal with each other anyway. If you do it, then just pay for the dress and whatever else she had to order for your wedding.

                       
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    You feel sorry for our FIs and DHs, don't you? Please say it!
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    Kicking her out of the wedding = kicking her out of your life.  If you're okay with that, fine, it sounds like you'd both be better off anyway.  But unless she makes the decision to step down without any prompting, you have to reimburse her for any costs she incurred with the expectation of being in your wedding.  It doesn't sound like she's above taking you to small claims court over it, and frankly, you'd probably lose.

    If, for whatever reason, you two crazy drama queens want to remain friends, then you get to suck it up and deal with it until after the wedding.  It was your bad decision to let someone you didn't particularly like be your MOH, and now you get to deal with the consequences of that like a grownup.
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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-drama-5-weeks-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:d47e2e13-7568-468e-be14-4bd5bc3835e1Post:bc1ce81c-90ca-4a2d-a0a2-964df2c73f3b">Re: MOH drama 5 weeks before wedding!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm pretty sure everyone on here didn't get the point of the story. She was not requiring a certain shoe, just that they had to be the same. The bridesmaids picked the shoes (which I'm assuming includes the MOH) and the MOH never said anything about them needing to be wide.

    Posted by kikicurlytop[/QUOTE]

    Er, that IS requiring a certain shoe. All this is saying is that the bride passed off the responsibility of picking them to the bridesmaids, so all that's really happening is that the blame is being shifted to someone else. It's still not allowing the BMs to each pick their own shoe ... and the reason that everyone keeps bringing this up is to point out, "If you let them each get their own (clean) shoe in a certain color, then this would be one more headache off your plate."

    Anyway, from my understanding, the jist of the OP's problem seems to be, "My friend who's always been a jerk is continuing to be a jerk."

    Well, only so much of that blame lies with the friend. It doesn't seem like the friend suddenly did a 180 and turned into a giant jerk here. If the bride selected her for her wedding (or let her talk herself into being the MOH), then the blame mostly lies with her for expecting this person to change.

    So the OP can either suck it up and deal with her, or boot her from the wedding (and her life/friendship) and then deal with whatever backlash may come her way.

    Neither is really a pleasant option, but those are the choices. I don't see a situation here where the jerky MOH will suddenly say, "You know, Bride, you're right and I'm wrong and I'm being an awful friend. Hugs and kisses!"
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    Wait a minute OP.  You're already married?  All of this is over a vow renewal?  Really?
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-drama-5-weeks-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d47e2e13-7568-468e-be14-4bd5bc3835e1Post:b1a77df4-aeb3-4b79-b710-16a5e7c5a4cc">Re: MOH drama 5 weeks before wedding!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Wait a minute OP.  You're already married?  All of this is over a vow renewal?  Really?
    Posted by trix1223[/QUOTE]

    <div>Oooooh, good catch trix. OP, this behavior is absolutely ridic. </div>
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    Sunbonnet or cone of shame? You be the judge! Trixie's Blog
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-drama-5-weeks-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d47e2e13-7568-468e-be14-4bd5bc3835e1Post:bc1ce81c-90ca-4a2d-a0a2-964df2c73f3b">Re: MOH drama 5 weeks before wedding!</a>:
    [QUOTE]You guys all suck. If you are going to respond to something, at least understand what the person needs help with. People go on here for advice, not to be ripped into. Obviously this girl is really hurting over this issue. Regardless whether or not you think it's valid, you need to be considerate of people's feelings.
    Posted by kikicurlytop[/QUOTE]

    MOD HERE.

    Kikicurlytop, phrases like, "You guys all suck," are completely inappropriate and they don't help to create a constructive environment that you believe this board needs to be.

    OP, it's possibly too late since you deleted but I do have to wonder why you're having BMs for a vow renewal. 
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    WOW, I didn't see anything in the OP about a vow renewal OR her infant daughter. Must have been that wall of text obscuring my comprehension.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-drama-5-weeks-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:d47e2e13-7568-468e-be14-4bd5bc3835e1Post:91abe650-3d6e-478c-9f39-a0a221bacb78">Re: MOH drama 5 weeks before wedding!</a>:
    [QUOTE] And yes i have seen a wedding where all the BM's wore different black shoes and it looked awful.  one girl was in black f me pumps, one in a clear stripper heel, another in black penny loffers that you would wear to work and another in scuffed up kitten heels.  <strong>Yes everyone noticed especially since their dresses were short.</strong>
    Posted by momofayden[/QUOTE]

    Even if everyone did notice?   WTF cares?  It's shoes on a BM for god's sake.  It's not like it ruins the wedding. " OMG... WTH was the BM thinking wearing those shoes? the couple is now going to get divorced"...  geez.

    Now I agree the MOH might have been able to tell the bride about needing a wide shoe.  But really, the bride herself says the MOH is huge, so it's not really a stretch to figure out most larger woman would not be comfortable in the same style shoe as an average woman.  I'm fairly certain I would have understood this without even being told and just let them pick out their own shoe based on color and style (strappy, closed toe, etc).






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Options
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-drama-5-weeks-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:d47e2e13-7568-468e-be14-4bd5bc3835e1Post:d9d888c7-1921-4b2e-9251-849bd1a13e42">Re: <3</a>:
    [QUOTE]WOW, I didn't see anything in the OP about a vow renewal OR her infant daughter. Must have been that wall of text obscuring my comprehension.
    Posted by SarahPLiz[/QUOTE]

    It was in a different post. 

    Having BMs for a vow renewal is just wrong. 
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