Wedding Party

Someone to Carry Train?

Both mother's think that I need someone to carry my train while I walk down the "aisle" - outdoors, over concrete and grass. They are concerned the train will get caught on something.

FI has two nieces (ages 12 & 14) who have indicated they want to do something in the wedding. The wedding is in 3 weeks.

First, would those be OK ages for this role, and second, would it look akward with two of them? Pic below. Thanks!

Re: Someone to Carry Train?

  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers

    Personally I don't think you need anyone to carry your train.  Your train isn't very long and I don't think it will get caught that badly on anything.  The most you could do is have one (or both) of the young girls hold it up till you get to the beginning of the aisle and then lay it out nicely before you begin to walk.  I also think that 12 and 14 is definitely old enough to handle this responsibility.


  • mbcdefgmbcdefg member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    If they're really begging you for something to do, and this is something you honestly need done, I think it's O.K. to ask them if they want to do it.

    If you want an honest opinion, though, I think it'd look silly and a bit pretentious to have one kid (let alone two) carrying your train. I think a lot of people might equate that to you wanting your own personal Pippa Middleton, lol. Don't get me wrong, I know your intention is to have the train intact and not show off or anything, but I think that two train-bearers risks coming across a bit odd.

    And if you decide that it's really necessary to have the girls carry the train, I would just list them under Bridal Party, and not as Train-Bearers or Pages or anything.
    image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_someone-carry-train?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:e612e9a0-eb41-4de3-a438-bdf4f0ddbe5fPost:939d64f7-db03-491c-9a9e-b94b5ace0040">Re: Someone to Carry Train?</a>:
    [QUOTE]If they're really begging you for something to do, and this is something you honestly need done, I think it's O.K. to ask them if they want to do it. If you want an honest opinion, though, I think it'd look silly and a bit pretentious to have one kid (let alone two) carrying your train. <strong>I think a lot of people might equate that to you wanting your own personal Pippa Middleton, lol. </strong>Don't get me wrong, I know your intention is to have the train intact and not show off or anything, but I think that two train-bearers risks coming across a bit odd. And if you decide that it's really necessary to have the girls carry the train, I would just list them under Bridal Party, and not as Train-Bearers or Pages or anything.
    Posted by mbcdefg[/QUOTE]

    This is the first image that popped into my head, to be honest.

    Without seeing the ground you'll be walking over, I can't say whether it seems necessary or not; at first blush, it doesn't.  But if you're really concerned, and they want to do it, I think it's probably okay.  But don't MAKE them if they don't want to.
    image
  • mbcdefgmbcdefg member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    I also think that with a small sweep/lace train like that (very pretty BTW) you could easily pick it up and carry it yourself if you're truly on rough terrain, and then your MOH could straighten it out once you get to the altar area. Or maybe your dad/escort can help you.

    Maybe you can ask the coordinator at your venue if previous brides have had a problem with their trains getting snagged on things during the walk to the altar?
    image
  • noodle_oonoodle_oo member
    1000 Comments
    edited May 2011
    oh, no, I woudln't do it.  Three reasons:

    1) I think it would look incredibly self-indulgent and pretentious.  I've never seen train bearer before and I just think that it would be too much.

    2)  Your train is relatively short.  The only time i could *maybe* see train bearers is if it was really long (or you're royalty, I'm assuming you aren't).  For your train, I don't think it is needed.

    3)  Asking a 12 and 14 year old?  No, don't do it.  I could *maybe* see little kids doing it (like 6 years old) but to ask older kids to do I think is insulting.

    I'd skip it.  You'll be fine.  If you are worried about it being caught, hold it up yourself (like when walking between buildings and stuff).  That's what all brides i"ve ever  seen do.  During the ceremony, it will be fine.  Or if you are really worried, use an aisle runner to provide a smooth surface.
  • Thanks for the opinions. My Mom and FMIL are the ones who are worried about it more than me, I just wanted to hear other opinions. I guess it makes me a little nervous, but I will probably just let it drag.

    The venue has had brides do it both ways.
  • Thanks for the opinions. My Mom and FMIL are the ones who are worried about it more than me, I just wanted to hear other opinions. I guess it makes me a little nervous, but I will probably just let it drag.

    The venue has had brides do it both ways.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_someone-carry-train?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:e612e9a0-eb41-4de3-a438-bdf4f0ddbe5fPost:939d64f7-db03-491c-9a9e-b94b5ace0040">Re: Someone to Carry Train?</a>:
    [QUOTE]If they're really begging you for something to do, and this is something you honestly need done, I think it's O.K. to ask them if they want to do it. If you want an honest opinion, though, I think it'd look silly and a bit pretentious to have one kid (let alone two) carrying your train.<strong> I think a lot of people might equate that to you wanting your own personal Pippa Middleton,</strong> lol. Don't get me wrong, I know your intention is to have the train intact and not show off or anything, but I think that two train-bearers risks coming across a bit odd. And if you decide that it's really necessary to have the girls carry the train, I would just list them under Bridal Party, and not as Train-Bearers or Pages or anything.
    Posted by mbcdefg[/QUOTE]


    This is what I imagined as well.
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  • When my SIL got married, she had to walk outside to the front doors of the church to go in.  We helped her carry her train so that it wouldn't get dirty on the grass, concrete, brick, etc.  It wasn't a "chore" and it was just out of a need, not some "Pippa Middleton" complex, for sure.  We just wanted her dress to be beautiful and not muddied up by all of the different surfaces she'd have to walk over before getting to the door to the aisle of the church.  I would suspect that if you asked for help to make sure your train didn't drag, you may have someone willing to help out, someone who is already in your wedding party as opposed to a new person.  
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  • edited May 2011
    I would not personally ask anyone to hold my train. I have a sweep train too and have a long veil as well. Mine is longer than the pic you provided and also has more material so i do need someone to fluff it. The only thing I need is someone to help me fix my train when I get out of the limo before I walk down the aisle. Anything after that I just might ask my husband.

    If I was someone's MOH I would not want that job especially if it is unnecessary.
  • I don't think it's necessary. I have seen the MOH fluff or straighten out the train, but that's about it. Your train (which is very pretty btw) isn't long enough to warrant a carrier IMO. Unless you're going through mud puddles or something, it should be OK.


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  • mbcdefgmbcdefg member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_someone-carry-train?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:e612e9a0-eb41-4de3-a438-bdf4f0ddbe5fPost:d8298510-06dd-4a7a-96a8-9c9a61d0a693">Re: Someone to Carry Train?</a>:
    [QUOTE]When my SIL got married, she had to walk outside to the front doors of the church to go in.  We helped her carry her train so that it wouldn't get dirty on the grass, concrete, brick, etc.  It wasn't a "chore" and it was just out of a need, not some "Pippa Middleton" complex, for sure.  We just wanted her dress to be beautiful and not muddied up by all of the different surfaces she'd have to walk over before getting to the door to the aisle of the church.  I would suspect that if you asked for help to make sure your train didn't drag, you may have someone willing to help out, someone who is already in your wedding party as opposed to a new person.  
    Posted by kellya01[/QUOTE]

    But this person isn't talking about someone to carry her train until she gets to the aisle, it appears. It looks like her moms want someone to carry her train DOWN the aisle.

    My dad helped carry my train until I walked into the church (which I didn't realize until I got the photos back). Someone may have straightened it out for me before I went down the aisle ... I honestly don't know. The only thing going through my mind right before I walked down the aisle was, "don't trip don't trip don't trip don't trip don't trip don't trip!!!!!!"
    image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_someone-carry-train?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:e612e9a0-eb41-4de3-a438-bdf4f0ddbe5fPost:d3fddbc1-402a-4a8b-a70e-22312d96d420">Re: Someone to Carry Train?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Someone to Carry Train? : But this person isn't talking about someone to carry her train until she gets to the aisle, it appears. It looks like her moms want someone to carry her train DOWN the aisle. My dad helped carry my train until I walked into the church (which I didn't realize until I got the photos back). Someone may have straightened it out for me before I went down the aisle ... I honestly don't know. The only thing going through my mind right before I walked down the aisle was, "don't trip don't trip don't trip don't trip don't trip don't trip!!!!!!"
    Posted by mbcdefg[/QUOTE]
    Yeah based on what I read her parents are wanting someone to carry her train down the aisle. Her train is short and if someone carried it, then it would ruin the look of the dress. If I were a guest at this person's wedding I would be "what in the hell is that"? 
  • Ah, perhaps I misread the OP, I must have gotten the impression that it was pre-wedding train carrying going on.  (and an earth wind and fire song comes into my head now...)  My mistake, sorry ladies! 

    Maybe an aisle runner would be warranted in this circumstance.  Protects the dress from the grass, and it wouldn't have to be rolled out until the bride is ready to walk down the aisle.  Dress is then protected from whatever she has to walk on, and no train carrier for the walk down the aisle is needed... :-)  I'd carry the train myself until I got to the "actual" aisle where people are seated though, and then let it lay on the aisle runner as usual.  


    July 16, Our Wedding Day, is also International Juggling Day!
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