Note in the Invitation

Manwaithiel

As most of you know *looks at ticker* I'm getting married in 2 weeks. As most of you also know *looks at profile date* my party and blessing ceremony are set for May.

I want to add a note in the invitations about it, just to make sure there are no misunderstandings. I think we've told pretty much everyone what's going on and everyone ranges from thrilled to "that's nice" about it, but I still want to make certain that everyone is aware of what's going on and it's not some kind of surprise later.

What should I say?

I'm thinking "The ceremony you will be attending is a church blessing for the marriage of Groom and Bride, who legally married on December 20, 2010." Or something like that?

bablingbrooke

I would just make it a blessing invitation, rather than a wedding invitation with a note clarifying.

"Manwa and Mr. Manwa invite you to the blessing of their marriage, which occurred on X date at Y location" or something like that.  You'll find a better way to word it than I did.

Manwaithiel

Crap...

So, I know I should have thought of this BEFORE I ordered invitations...but...FI and I had some money awhile ago (we don't now) and we ordered invitations with our save the dates and such. We had talked to everyone already who received a save the date, so we weren't concerned about the explanation thing then and we just decided to grab the invitations at the same time (vistaprint makes it so easy) and we just worded it as "Bride's parents invite you to celebrate the marriage of Manwa and Mr. Manwa" and later thought "we should write another thingymajig".

So I guess I just messed this up... =(

bablingbrooke

Well that sucks.  Did you already get them, or have you just placed the order?

Manwaithiel

They were ordered awhile ago...

ETA: Meaning I have them already.

aerinpegadrak

Are you having reception inserts, and have they already been ordered?  You could word the insert to say something like "Following the blessing of the marriage, a reception will be held at..."  It might be a little less awkward if you're indirectly referring to it, rather than out and out saying, "By the way, it's not actually a wedding ceremony."

emilykathleen511

If you said a "celebrate the marriage of" in your invitation, then it should already be implied that you are already married. Unless I have reading comprehension fail or something (which is entirely possible).

Manwaithiel

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_invitation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:f24d0581-3829-498a-9556-4a320cc8216ePost:990d63a4-46a4-42ec-897d-927f145146eb">Re: Note in the Invitation</a>:
[QUOTE]If you said a "celebrate the marriage of" in your invitation, then it should already be implied that you are already married. Unless I have reading comprehension fail or something (which is entirely possible).
Posted by emilykathleen511[/QUOTE]

That's what we were thinking too. We put that on both the save the dates and the invitations, but then we were afraid it might not be clear enough. We did NOT say 'wedding' anywhere on the stationery.

It's also very common in my family and from the weddings I've attended to sign the license, get the petition for a name change and all that jazz at least a week if not longer before the ceremony, which I guess would make it a blessing technically though everyone I speak to about it is like, "Whatever, we're still calling it your wedding." I guess it's just not even something I thought would be a problem until I got on TK and was like, "Oh wow...people could really be offended by this," and started thinking of ways to make it perfectly clear.

Manwaithiel

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_invitation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:f24d0581-3829-498a-9556-4a320cc8216ePost:08bd8a96-0af6-41d7-be54-00d2a3484703">Re: Note in the Invitation</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree with aerin.  I would put it indirectly. ETA:  While honesty is always the best policy, and I commend you for wanting to make sure your guests know the whole deal, I think putting a note in that is THAT up front is a little jarring.  It could come across as "just so you know, you aren't attending my technical wedding.  We did that without you." I KNOW that isn't your intention and *I* wouldn't take it that way, but I see how someone very easily could.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

I didn't even think about that...

sister2groom

Are you changing your name after the wedding? Because if your new name is on the invites that would make it pretty clear without saying so directly.

Manwaithiel

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_invitation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:f24d0581-3829-498a-9556-4a320cc8216ePost:0532584e-7885-42d6-a2d8-234889655e72">Re: Note in the Invitation</a>:
[QUOTE]Are you changing your name after the wedding? Because if your new name is on the invites that would make it pretty clear without saying so directly.
Posted by sister2groom[/QUOTE]

We just put our first names on the return addresses on the envelopes, but we figured we could start using the new last name and people would gradually catch on. Like I said, most people have been "debriefed", I'm just trying to keep the duckies in a row.