Catholic/Jewish Wedding

mbuckley85

So my fiance is Jewish, but we are having a Catholic ceremony.  Every thing that is said will be modified to be more "neutral" and the ceremony is being run by a deacon and isn't going on in a church.  That being said, I know in a Jewish wedding, the mother and father of the groom usually walk side by side down the aisle with him.  I'm am afraid to approach this with my in-laws, but I feel like this would look very strange because I am only walking with my father.  I would prefer that my fiance just already be at the alter when I arrive.  He doesn't care what we do, but I just think his mother is going to flip out when she finds out she isn't walking him down the aisle.
I have come up with one idea, that being that Mike gets walked down the aisle before I arrive, his parents take their seats etc, and then he is waiting at the alter. 
I really think the whole arm in arm with both parents looks weird but that's probably just me... 

ElisabethJoanne

Let him do what he wants. Let him deal with his mother.

I advise 1) mentally going through all the Catholic traditions you can think of, and deciding what's a must, what's a maybe, and what's a do-without.

Then 2) having him do the same with the Jewish traditions.

3) Check with parents about what traditions are "musts" to them.

4) Read or at least skim a book about Catholic wedding traditions, and a book about Jewish wedding traditions. Repeat the must, maybe, do-without decisions from what you read in the books. The books help jog your memories and fill in gaps. You may not have decided, for example, how the wedding party will leave the altar/chuppah area. There may be a Catholic or Jewish tradition you like that solves this detail for you.

cjschnabel

I am also Catholic and my FI is Jewish -- both of us are more entreanched in our traditions vs religion.  

My FI will be escorted by both his mother and father and then my mother will be escorted by my uncle and I will be escorted by my father.  FI will still be waiting for me at the altar and everyone gets what they want!  I really like the idea of both parents walking down the aisle -- both of them raised me and loved me, but I didn't want to take that away from my father

We are having both a Rabbi and a Priest co-officiate, but have NOT been able to find a Catholic priest to do this -- most are reformed priests or of a different denomination.  We will use both Christian and Jewish traditions through the ceremony.

If anyone happens to know of a Catholic priest that will co-officiate then pls send info my way! Located in NY.

Flygirl6

My son is catholic and fi is reform Jewish. And he said he will forgo his mixed marriage in church to please her and marry her at a outdoor venue . He says he will always love his faith and never give up his faith. I feel he doesn't understand what this decision means . She also can only get a cantor as she is reform which I want to try and find a deacon to be their to officiate and represent our faith as well. I know as a catholic we need the dispensation form,then can we get a priest to come to the venue? Venue is in Tampa fla in march 2013. Need help!!!!!! If anyone has answers

Riss91

It is very rare to get a dispensation in the Catholic Church in order to marry outdoors. Also, a Catholic priest or deacon is not allowed to co-officiate this type of ceremony. I would make sure your son is aware that he will no longer be able to receive sacraments, such as communion, if he decides not to have a Catholic ceremony.

FWIW, I have heard of Catholic/Jewish couples being married in a Catholic church with some Jewish elements incorporated. Sometimes, a rabbi will even be involved. Just something else to consider!

mauragreen

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_interfaith-weddings_catholicjewish-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:396Discussion:d4f8f8ce-6575-4bb6-802d-ee757fff52f2Post:7a2b0bd9-d4e6-4881-9c3d-48a622aa54d5">Re: Catholic/Jewish Wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]I am also Catholic and my FI is Jewish -- both of us are more entreanched in our traditions vs religion.   My FI will be escorted by both his mother and father and then my mother will be escorted by my uncle and I will be escorted by my father.  FI will still be waiting for me at the altar and everyone gets what they want!  I really like the idea of both parents walking down the aisle -- both of them raised me and loved me, but I didn't want to take that away from my father We are having both a Rabbi and a Priest co-officiate, but have NOT been able to find a Catholic priest to do this -- most are reformed priests or of a different denomination.  We will use both Christian and Jewish traditions through the ceremony. If anyone happens to know of a Catholic priest that will co-officiate then pls send info my way! Located in NY.
Posted by cjschnabel[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I had the same Issue trying to find a priest.</div><div>Father Thomas Leonard at Holy Trinity on the Upper West Side will do it.</div><div>Be warned- he is 85.</div><div>I was shocked when my parish priest said no, And very dissapointed.  I am actually thinking of switching to another parish.

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mauragreen

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_interfaith-weddings_catholicjewish-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:396Discussion:d4f8f8ce-6575-4bb6-802d-ee757fff52f2Post:08aa0b80-5f7c-40ca-b17c-99f8fd577908">Catholic/Jewish Wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]So my fiance is Jewish, but we are having a Catholic ceremony.  Every thing that is said will be modified to be more "neutral" and the ceremony is being run by a deacon and isn't going on in a church.  That being said, I know in a Jewish wedding, the mother and father of the groom usually walk side by side down the aisle with him.  I'm am afraid to approach this with my in-laws, but I feel like this would look very strange because I am only walking with my father.  I would prefer that my fiance just already be at the alter when I arrive.  He doesn't care what we do, but I just think his mother is going to flip out when she finds out she isn't walking him down the aisle. I have come up with one idea, that being that Mike gets walked down the aisle before I arrive, his parents take their seats etc, and then he is waiting at the alter.  I really think the whole arm in arm with both parents looks weird but that's probably just me... 
Posted by mbuckley85[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>It seems to be that your fiance has already compromised a lot by agreeing to have a Catholic Ceremony. I think your desire to have him stading at the front doesn't have much to do with religion and it seems to me like maybe you should just let that go if it's really important to his parents and it's part of his religious tradition.</div><div>It may seem "weird" to you but it isnt weird to his side of the family and the wedding should represent both of you.

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