No Outside Food and Kids

reebsreebs

We are using a kosher venue and the vaad mischigach in this area is very strict. We are going to indicate "no outside food" on our wedding website where we talk about the venue (and have spoken to the photographer about what granola bars are ok and what aren't). But a family member said that the "no outside food" policy will be a problem for kids at the wedding.  We are having indian food, which will include potato pakora as an appetizer, naan and rice which are all kid-friendly (if starchy) as well as paneer and daal and stuff like that.  Do we need to do something else for kids?  We could put together kid "goody bags" with coloring books and granola bars or something like that if it would help.  Not sure what else to do.

amgrossman

I can't believe you found kosher Indian food!

A kid's goody bag sounds like a good idea in this case. 

I was very picky growing up and if I went to an event where there wasn't much food I liked I just wouldn't eat. So hopefully they'll like whatever is in the goody bag and wont starve.

Either way, not everyone is going to like the food (i'm doing kosher Chinese for my wedding so I'm in a similar boat) so if having the food makes you happy on your special day there's nothing the guests can really do besides complain (and hopefully not directly to you). 

silversparks

We also had a very strict vaad mashgiach, with the same policy. But the only kids I can imagine a "no outside food" policy being a problem for is very small children who only eat baby food/cheerios, or if there is a child with a serious allergy. If your relative's concern is that the kids won't like the food, well that's too darn bad. If your kid is a picky eater, feed them grilled cheese before the wedding and let them eat dessert. You certainly don't have to cater to such food preferences or children who aren't being taught how to courteously turn down food they would prefer not to eat. Or you could forgo the themed food for the kids and let them have a kids meal of chicken fingers and fries, but you don't have to.
For the very small children, I'm pretty sure you could bring in a box of cheerios and baggies and tell the parents to help themselves, ask them to please bring only kosher purchased baby food with plastic spoons. Bottles were definitely not a problem for us. Kids with allergies - the conversation goes, "dear cousin Shaindel, I'm so glad that little Rivky will be sharing in our simcha, Unfortunately the hall won't allow any outside food in. If you tell us exactly what Rivky's allergies are we can check with the caterer to see if this will be a problem. Otherwise, she may have to eat before you come"

reebsreebs

One of the best kosher resturants in Seattle is an Indian place, so we are using them as our caterer and are VERY excited about it.

Chicken fingers, etc won't work, as it is a dairy meal, but grilled cheese or cheesy pasta could. I'll talk to our caterer about that.  There will be one breast feeding (I assume- he isn't born yet) baby and otherwise all kids will be on full solids (not just avacado and rice cereal). But perhaps we can get some packaged kid-friendly snacks to put out on the "kids table" or in the kids play area. I'll talk to my parent friends about that.

I'm with you that kids should either eat what we have on offer or eat before they come, but the relative who brought this up said she thought the mother in question would bring food and feed her kids in the lobby.  The venue isn't kosher all the time, so she may think this is ok, but it is kosher on that day and I don't think the misgiach would be happy.  Of course, I won't be the one patrolling, so perhaps I shouldn't worry so much.

chavanola

IIn my expreience, when kosher caterers say no outside food, they are generally referring to food bought for adults or children who are of age to eat "real food" (ie toddlers).  All but one of the weddings I've been to have been strictly kosher with no outside food.  However, at every wedding there are always a couple mothers feeding babies bottles or cheerios (or some similar food).  As long as the parents are not doing it on the table or using the caterer utensils it shouldn't be a problem.  If people either pull their kid's chair back from the table a little before feeding them some kind of nosh or bottle or bring them to another room/the lobby it shouldn't be an issue.  However, the concern for children who just don't like the food--well the suggestion of some kind of kiddie food is a good one or tell parents to feed them before hand.  People should not assume they can change your wedding menu, if its that big of a concern, their kids should stay home.

shortee426

I think the goody bag is a good idea.  Not just for the kids, but for the adults.  I do not like Indian food and would be very hungry if that was the only option.

whaleflipflops

Is it possible for you to find out what exactly is meant by the "no outside food" policy? Is it no food of any kind period no ifs, ands, or butts or is it no outside food to be consumed on the premises using our dishes and flatware but feel free to feed your children Cheerios in the hallway as long as you do it from a ziploc bag or container and not one of our plates? This may give you a better sense of what to tell parents and how to react in such situations.

I think that having some kiddie foods/snacks would be a good idea. I went to a very kid-friendly wedding recently where the bride and groom had tables for the kids. Instead of linens, they were covered with white paper. The centerpieces had bubbles, crayons, raisins, snacks, and small knick knacks for the kids to play with so they wouldn't be bored while the parents were off having fun. Is doing something like that an option for you?