Jewish Weddings

rabbi at the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner???

I have been in several Jewish weddings and I can't recall ever having the rabbi at the rehearsal. Do they typically participate? Also, is it customary to invite the Rabbi to the rehearsal dinner???? My future mother in law (who is Catholic) assumes our rabbi will be included in both???

Re: rabbi at the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner???

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    RachiemooRachiemoo member
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    edited December 2011

     A lot of traditional Jews don't have rehearsals / rehearsal dinners (in my experience, at least).  If you are having a rehearsal with the Rabbi, I would probably invite him to the dinner if you'd like, but I am guessing he/she will probably politely decline.  I've been in the bridal party of a few Catholic weddings, and I remember the Priest doing the rehearsal but not attending the dinner.

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    edited December 2011
    We are not having a rehearsal or formal rehearsal dinner, but we are having a dinner the night before the wedding for the bridal party and some out of town guests.  However, since this is on a Friday night, the Rabbi will not be attending, nor will our cousin/cantor/co-officiant.
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    tenofcups4metenofcups4me member
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    edited December 2011
    I"ve never been to or even heard of a rehearsal for a Jewish wedding so I don't think there is any "standard" for how it would go. Have you already discussed having a rehearsal with the rabbi or are you just assuming that's what you would do?
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    Jeni35Jeni35 member
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    edited December 2011
    We are having some sort of "rehearsal; but I think it is just to clarify what will happen prior to the ceremony and after so no one is confused. The temple actually made me pay for this with their "wedding planner", so I am making sure I am paying for something.  The good question is whether this will be Sunday morning (our wedding is at 2pm) or later Saturday evening. We are having a dinner; but because I am afraid people will get sick by trying something extra fancy- we will stick to something basic like pasta. I didn't know about inviting the rabbi to this; but I will extend the invitation. He and his wife are of course invited to the reception. 
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    leoraannaleoraanna member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I know we are going to have a rehersal just to ease everyone's nerves and make sure that everyone knows what they are supposed to do and when. The rabbi most likely won't be there and we aren't inviting him to the Shabbat dinner we are having for the wedding party and family. We are really just going through the ceremony and reception details with the wedding planner and all parties involved sometime the week before the wedding. Not sure when yet, but it's still close to 7 months away!
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    edited December 2011
    Ditto a few knotties, Jews don't have rehearsals (certainly nothing formal), though some opt for "rehearsal" dinners - any excuse to eat.  We are not doing either; we've gone over the fine points with the rabbi as is and we will just be too busy wrapping up late minute things to have dinner.  Plus, at least for me anyway, I'm going to see all these folks the next day, I just want to be on my own and not bother - and it's another expense I don't have to worry about...
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    2dBride2dBride member
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    edited December 2011
    I never had a rehearsal at either of my weddings.  The first time, we had a "rehearsal dinner" anyway, basically to feed all the out of town guests who had arrived by the night before.  This time around, we ordered in pizza for everyone who was there by the night before.
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    edited December 2011
    Jews dont have rehearsals cause it's bad luck.  The most rehearsing anyone does, is the day of and its just for the bridal party, not the bride.  But to make FI's family for comfy, we too are doing a luncheon for all the bridal party and out of town family.  Any excuse to eat and be together is fine in my book!
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