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Jewish Weddings

Need invitation wording help

So my parents are paying for the entire wedding even though my FILs are inviting 75% of the guests- don't ask! Anyway, I was thinking since my parents are hosting the event, I would just put their names on the invitation and not my FILs. I am nervous to do this because even though they refuse to pay for anything, they are demanding a lot and I don't want them to feel 'slighted'. I wanted to get some input to see what everyone on the board thinks.
Thanks!

Re: Need invitation wording help

  • shortee426shortee426 member
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Word it as if your parents are hosting.  If your FI or his parents want their names on there, then add a "son of" line.  Definitely check with your FI before printing them to see if he wants that line.
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    Anniversary
  • edited December 2011
    What shortee said. But man, you FILs sound delightful. Insisting on the majority of the guest list with no money added is crass.
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  • edited December 2011
    need you remind them that etiquette states that whomever is paying is inviting? they have no right to invite so many people.

    put their names on the invite for good measure.
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  • tenofcups4metenofcups4me member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    "Son of" is perfect for this. I certainly wouldn't put their names at the top, but I do think they should be acknowledged as his parents.
  • Musicheals71Musicheals71 member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    My invitation wording was as follows since my parents also hosted:

    Bride's Father and Bride's Mother invite you to
    rejoice at the wedding of their daughter
    Bride
    and
    Groom
    son of Groom's Father and Groom's Mother

  • RachiemooRachiemoo member
    Tenth Anniversary 500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    i agree with everyone else who suggested "son of" and the parent's names.
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  • mickeypottermickeypotter member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    shortee426 is right--and since everyone else said the same thing, everyone is right.

    I had the same situation--not with teh 75% thing but with my folks paying.
  • edited December 2011
    Selfishly adding my own questions:
    My parents are paying for the majority, but FI family is paying for part.... how woudl I word that?!?!?!
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  • RachiemooRachiemoo member
    Tenth Anniversary 500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    @ sb - i would put both parent's names at the top, that is what we did.
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  • edited December 2011
    I realize that I am in the minority here, but I would just print your parents' names. They are footing the bill and are hosting the wedding and I think that their names solely deserve to be on the invitation. Fiance and I had a similar issue- his parents didn't invite nearly that many people, but they invited about 10-20 more than my family and did not want to pay. I let him know that if they did not want to contribute then that was fine, but their names would not go on the invitation.

    Also, fiance is active duty military and we are printing his rank on our invitation.

    Bride's Parents invite you to
    celebrate the wedding of their daughter
    Bride
    to
    Groom
    Staff Sergeant, United States Air Force

    IMO, adding "son of groom's dad and groom's mom" under that would be too much.
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  • Laurensara18Laurensara18 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Thanks guys! 
  • edited December 2011
    Thanks Rachie!
    Anniversary
  • edited December 2011
    I think it depends on the families and how traditional everyone is or how old the couple getting married is. I like this wording (and am using it on our invitations):

    bride's name and groom's name
    with the love and support of their parents
    bride's parents
    groom's parents

    ask you to join in their celebration of marriage on
    May 22, 2011
    Location 
    Time
    Reception to immediately follow
  • Magdala9Magdala9 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    We paid for the wedding and wrote,

    Together with our parents  
    Anne & Thomas Bride and 
    Sylvia & David Groom
    Rachel Elizabeth Bride and Benjamin Saul Groom  
    request that you join us to celebrate our wedding.

    The biggest argument from the mothers was that they did not want to Mrs.  Thomas or Mrs. David.  With long last names, we had to fiddle with the spacing several times to make it work.  
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