Question..

LindzMarie19

Most of you ladies probably have already got your BM in order with dresses ordered and everything. Im on a tight budget and have already let two of my bridesmaids know that they need to pay for their dress. We're pretty open and blunt with eachother lol.  ( the dresses i have in mind are under 100 dollars from DB) However, I just asked two of my cousins if their little girl could be in my wedding as a junior BM and one as the flower girl.  How would you go about letting the parents know that they need to pay for the dress? I guess I just don't know how to put it to where its not rude.

chelseamb11

The standard etiquette is that they pay for the dress, so you shouldn't have to tell them anything.

[Deleted User]

Everyone in my wedding party is paying for their own attire, which seems to be the norm around here now. BUT I was very upfront about it when I asked all my girls to join us, and basically said "look, we can't afford to pay for your dress and such, so if you agree to be a BM you're also agreeing to that, and if you can't afford it I understand and would still like you to be a guest at our wedding." Then I worked with them to establish a budget and we have only looked at dresses in that price range. 

I kinda did the same thing with my cousin, who is the flower girl, so my aunt is paying for her attire. After I asked her I said something like "what price range are you comfortable with for the dress?" and actually I found an amazing one on http://prettyflowergirl.com/ that even I would have been comfortable paying for. Her whole attire (shoes and dress) were under $100 together!

chelseakopperud

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:10bc6594-7a18-4cf1-a2a1-165be64757dcPost:70a03077-225a-4fc3-8715-7560dbaf708f">Re: Question..</a>:
[QUOTE]The standard etiquette is that they pay for the dress, so you shouldn't have to tell them anything.
Posted by chelseamb11[/QUOTE]

This. They should assume they are paying unless you tell them otherwise.

kristin183

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:10bc6594-7a18-4cf1-a2a1-165be64757dcPost:70a03077-225a-4fc3-8715-7560dbaf708f">Re: Question..</a>:
[QUOTE]The standard etiquette is that they pay for the dress, so you shouldn't have to tell them anything.
Posted by chelseamb11[/QUOTE]

This.

Although I know where you are coming from. FI's nieces are our Flower Girls and I was afraid to ask his brother to pay for them (he is a real tight ass and can sometimes be a jerk) but I made a point to find Flower Girl dresses we could afford just in case we ended up paying for them. FI's Sister in Law emailed me that they would be buying the dresses :) So I didn't have to worry about it.

kristin183

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:10bc6594-7a18-4cf1-a2a1-165be64757dcPost:4713a7a6-b41c-48c5-8775-7f89f9a33ed4">Re: Question..</a>:
[QUOTE]Everyone in my wedding party is paying for their own attire, which seems to be the norm around here now. BUT I was very upfront about it when I asked all my girls to join us, and basically said "look, we can't afford to pay for your dress and such, so if you agree to be a BM you're also agreeing to that, and if you can't afford it I understand and would still like you to be a guest at our wedding." Then I worked with them to establish a budget and we have only looked at dresses in that price range.  I kinda did the same thing with my cousin, who is the flower girl, so my aunt is paying for her attire. After I asked her I said something like "what price range are you comfortable with for the dress?" and actually I found an amazing one on  <strong><a href="http://prettyflowergirl.com/" rel="nofollow">http://prettyflowergirl.com/</a></strong>  that even I would have been comfortable paying for. Her whole attire (shoes and dress) were under $100 together!
Posted by robynsch[/QUOTE]


That is where we are getting ours too! The girls' dresses are $50 bucks and then I made them flip flops to wear :)

kelsey+brandon

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:10bc6594-7a18-4cf1-a2a1-165be64757dcPost:70a03077-225a-4fc3-8715-7560dbaf708f">Re: Question..</a>:
[QUOTE]The standard etiquette is that they pay for the dress, so you shouldn't have to tell them anything.
Posted by chelseamb11[/QUOTE]

<div>This. It's the only requirement to being a member of the wedding party. You have to pay for your own attire.</div>

[Deleted User]

So reasonably priced eh? Which dress did you end up getting? 

My flower girl is wearing this dress: http://www.prettyflowergirl.com/store/index.php/royal-blue-yoryu-chiffon-girl-dress.html

With smaller versions of my TOMS (seen below). She is so excited, aparently the shoes came yesterday and they are huge because my aunt didn't want them to not fit her in June, but she loves them and was wearing them everywhere!

kristin183

HA HA! Guess I was wrong.. I know I looked at that site though and was close to purchasing another dress. Guess I found this one on wpnderfuldress.com
Here is the dress
http://www.wonderfuldress.com/flower_girl_dresses/index.php?_a=viewProd&productId=769&ccUser=c6c97a48dff867c974ca6c1f4ceaaaf2

Ash61612

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:10bc6594-7a18-4cf1-a2a1-165be64757dcPost:70a03077-225a-4fc3-8715-7560dbaf708f">Re: Question..</a>:
[QUOTE]The standard etiquette is that they pay for the dress, so you shouldn't have to tell them anything.
Posted by chelseamb11[/QUOTE]
agree

SheilaDancer43

My BMs knew they were paying for it. If it ended up that we all loved one dress and they couldn't afford it, I told them I'd pay for the remainder. It ended up that they came in right at budget! We haven't really even looked for flower girl dresses yet. I might end up paying for one of them (or at least part of it) b/c her mom isn't really financially capable right now. But as others said, they should know that they are expected to buy their own dress, so no need to tell them anything.

kipnus

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:10bc6594-7a18-4cf1-a2a1-165be64757dcPost:4713a7a6-b41c-48c5-8775-7f89f9a33ed4">Re: Question..</a>:
[QUOTE]I kinda did the same thing with my cousin, who is the flower girl, so my aunt is paying for her attire. After I asked her I said something like "what price range are you comfortable with for the dress?" 
Posted by robynsch[/QUOTE]

<div>If you're not positive that they're aware of dress-buying etiquette, this is a good question that will let them know! </div>

MMRoberts11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:10bc6594-7a18-4cf1-a2a1-165be64757dcPost:70a03077-225a-4fc3-8715-7560dbaf708f">Re: Question..</a>:
[QUOTE]The standard etiquette is that they pay for the dress, so you shouldn't have to tell them anything.
Posted by chelseamb11[/QUOTE]

Agreed.  Very few people can/do pay for the WP attire.

Zimsgirl26

They should pay for their dress but see what their budget is and pick accordingly