need knottie support NOW

jennlin

so a few of you know (facebook status), that a little kid has been hanging around my house after school......turns out, he's afraid of going home because his grandpa hits him (no bruises) and he gets death threats from his older brother (15) on a daily basis. this kid is SEVEN years old...in KINDERGARTEN. who on earth could hit little kids or threaten them????? his mom doesn't get home till 8:30pm, and dad's not around.

after crying my eyes out yesterday, i reported it to a teacher at his school (she's a friend of mine), and she said she would pass the message....today, as i was outside, was just when he was showing up in my driveway, and he asked if he could come over.....nobody is home to open the door for him and he doesn't know how to get inside....i was furious.....

i called the school, and told them the whole situation and a counselor (who isn't there anymore today) will give me a call tomorrow.....

they gave me moms number, etc, and now moms on her way here...but she asked to have her kid come inside my house....which, well, i know i'm a safe person...but how does she?? she's letting her sweet little boy into my house....and it's just not right. why would she let her little boy into a strangers house? why aren't his caretakers there?

i just want some confirmation that what i'm doing is right.

i feel so bad for the kid..i don't want him to hate me for calling the cops, but if his mom doesn't show up 15 minutes after she told me she would be here to pick him up....i'm calling them.

STRESSED.

sarack

omg! i think you're doing the right thing. obviously the poor kid is scared and no one seems to have him at the top of their priority list. I think that the mother really needs to get on it. sad thing is.. if nothing happens and you were the safe place, his parents might threaten him if he comes to your house.. but i think reporting abuse is right. that is horrible.

trishaselby

I am so sorry. As a school teacher, we see many sad situations like this with parents that are too busy for their kids. Some times the parents aren't trying hard enough to make the kid a priority and in other cases the parents are trying their hardest and trying to do what is best for their kids.

If you could talk to the mom maybe you can understand more of the situation. The mom might be scared of the grandpa too. Also, the kid could be lying about the threats to get attention becuase he needs attention. Either way sad story. I think you have tried very hard and I think you do have an important role in this situation. I guess I would try to talk to the mom, who hopefully shows up on time and express your concerns. You can also tell her if you see her son locked out or scared to go home again, you don;t know what else to do besides call the police to help him.

Good luck! You are helping the little boy. BTW, he should not be 7 and in kindergarten. That is a little old.

jennlin

he's 7 and in K-garten cause they're from a different country and english isn't native..so they pushed his start date an extra year.

thanks for the support sara and trisha...i'm crying my eyes out right now hoping mom comes so i don't have to call the police.

KST_

If he is 7 and in kindergarten, that's 1-2 years older than the rest of the kids. Which means either they didn't bother trying to get him in earlier or he's been held back. If what he's telling you about his home life is true, then he probably is developing slower simply for lack of support.

You ARE doing the right thing. Reporting it to what authorities you can!!

jennyann28

Ditto PPs.  Call CPS if mom doesn't show, or this keeps up.  If he ever shows up with any bruises, take pictures too.

jennlin

mom is officially 5 minutes late as of right now.....i'm giving her 10 more...but no more than that.

trishaselby

Yes, keep it up. You would regret not calling if something else happened or if he suddenly moved, ect. Also, unfortunatley one call isn't going to get him taken away but at least most of the time it puts his family on the radar. At least that is what I have heard from my experiences. If nothing else maybe he could get counseling out of this situation:) GL!

KatyDidlettes

I have worked with a lot of these kids and you need to file a CPS report. They seriously wont do anything and leaving a 7 year old alone for that long is a big, big deal. Calling the police is a good idea too- these things need to be on a record in case there is some legal action. You should also make a list of all the dates and times you have seen him without a parent and what he has told you. Keeping a record is key-

jamers22

omg thank God for people like you who care enough to help the poor kid out! How can people be so cruel to their children?

You're doing the right thing.

KatyDidlettes

Also, if kids talk about it that means it is REALLLLLY bad. 99.9% of kids dont report because they know it is hard on the family. If he has taken that step it is because he is really scared and you need to take that seriously by getting the authorities involved.

jennuinne

I agree w/ pp, you are doing the right thing.  Most of the time nothing happens b/c peopel don't know what's going.on.  I would try to talk to mom first.  Sometimes being taken from your family, even if abusive, is more traumatic than staying.  And, of course the family my retaliate.  But, hopefully if some attention is put on the family they will step up b/c they don't want him taken or other legal trouble.

KatyDidlettes

I agree with you that it can be more tramatic, but I dont think that is really the place of someone observing to say- as a neighbor or friend there could be lots going on that you dont know about. That is why it is better left in the hands of the authorities.

Tygirljojo

*hugs* You're doing the right thing.  I hope his mom did show up when she said she would, but I agree with PPs.  You'll want to keep record of it and report it so the authorities have it on file.  Keep us posted?

jennlin

~ see sarack's page to me for an update...

good idea on keeping a record, i will.

carrieoz_76

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_washington-seattle_need-knottie-support-now?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:104Discussion:0bb9c3af-184d-4c18-a9c0-3407060051ddPost:a4316642-fcf6-48b6-b1be-5de0ff7e4d60">Re: need knottie support NOW</a>:
[QUOTE]Ditto PPs.  Call CPS if mom doesn't show, or this keeps up.  If he ever shows up with any bruises, take pictures too.
Posted by jennyann28[/QUOTE]
I agree.  1-800-END-HARM is the call-in number for CPS statewide.  They will need to know not just that the child reports that grandpa hits him, but that mom leaves the child with grandpa regularly (and if you know how often, they should know that).<div>
</div><div>I strongly recommend that you make this call, esp. if you see him at Grandpa's again.</div>

dbraulik

You are totally doing the right thing. I'm off to read about the update.

kinmir30

So I know I am pretty late....but I interned with CPS for 3 months because that is what I thought I wanted to be........def not saying I am an expert, but I learned a lot of things.

YOU NEED TO CALL THEM!!!! That is way too much against the parents. You may not see bruises on his arms or visible, but that doesn't mean that there aren't bruises where you cannot see. Also, CPS is required to investigate the claim within 24hrs and also you will remain anonymous forever! They are never allowed to let out who reported it, even in court documents.

I know it is scary to call CPS but it is really something that you should do, especially in these circumstances.