Sex question. Waiting/Only partner/Not the first/Etc.

doeie04

I have been thinking about this lately and wondered what your thoughts are.

Chad is my one and only and I am his. Sometimes I wonder if it is a bad thing? I wonder what he thinks about it? In no way do I regret it, or would I go out and sleep with someone just to be sure.... I think it is normal to wonder about things like this. Sometimes I panic because that is a long time to be with only one person, but when it comes down to it, there is no one else I would rather be with. He IS my one and only, so it is fitting!

I am just curious about what you all think. What about those of you who have had multiple partners, regrets? Any and all thoughts are welcome!

Enami

Well, I'm obviously not waiting for marriage til I have sex (haha, anybody buy it if I claim this baby is immaculate conception?), and FI is definitely not the first of my sexual partners, though I am his. And this bothers him. He very much wanted to wait until he found someone he wanted to spend his life with, and I respect that. I almost wish I could have made that decision for myself. But then I would be a different person than I am today, and probably in a different situation. There is nothing I would change about my life right now, so I can't really regret all my past partners. I do admit that  they were challenges in my life that forced me to become a better person and question what love meant to me and how it is/should be conveyed (my ex of 3 years was sexually abusive). They were tough, and they hurt even now. I'm kind of ashamed of how I was, and I always tell FI that if he knew me in high school, we'd never be together, because I was not in a good way then. But I feel that life is full of lessons, and what I learned from those failed relationships were the things I cherished in other people and what it really takes to have a good relationship, romantic or otherwise. I have friends that are saving themselves, and I praise them all the time for making that commitment and sticking to it. But I also think sex before marriage can be an amazing experience.

doeie04

I love all of your responses!

I didn't get a chance to talk to Chad about it yet. But I talked to his Mom (Yes, we are close, and she has only been with her husband) and she made me feel better. She had some of the same advice you guys did.

We are making some huge commitments here, and sometimes I stop and think about it and it is kinda scary! Forever is a long time, and Chad and I take marriage very seriously. I feel much better now!