Ladies, things have changed in my life. The wedding is absolutely still on, but the timing is totally up in the air. I'm not sure what I can say due to OPSEC (military security) but I'm choosing between getting married soon before a deployment, or after a deployment. I don't know whether it's better to do it sooner and have a little time together, and then have the strength of marriage to get us through the tough time and help us reconnect afterwards, or to wait until after, resulting in a long term engagement and then planning a wedding, trying to reconnect after deployment, and be newlyweds all at one time.
Many people I've asked suggest doing it before deployment. They say it will make the deployment and post-d adjustments easier, and that at least we'd have some time together before he leaves, and just that sooner is better. I started a thread on the military boards about it and the two posts so far both said do it after.
I'm scared of picking the wrong one - picking before and it sets us up for a difficult marriage from teh start, or picking after and we'll become disconnected and start the wedding hardly knowing each other anymore. I would really, really, really appreciate prayers for wisdom. And also any advice you have... and any comfort that maybe just maybe it'll be okay whichever way and this isn't going to ruin my marriage... :-P Dramatic I know but my parents just got divorced after 30 yrs of marriage so I'm *super* conscious of trying to set ourselves up for success as much as possible.
Feeling very lost and confused..