Last name change

biogal73

Hi Everyone.  I'm still waffling about whether or not to change my last name....

What are your plans?

midgetthemighty

You should do whatever you feel you want to do, not whichever answer gets the most votes. Asking is fine, I just want to make sure you're not going to just go with the majority vote.

Jean6912

I hate my stupid Ellis island last name that I have to explain all of the time, so I am definitely changing it I can't wait!!!

littleluckypenny

Keeping my last name.  FI's a little sad, but still supports my decision.  I've never wanted to change my name.  I just don't see the need to change it, and hyphenating a name is usually confusing for people (and any paperwork).

daria24

I'm not changing my last name, for a lot of reasons. But I agree with Midge that it's a completely personal decision and it's not "right" or "wrong" to change or keep your name.

I also just want to say that it's not a decision you have to make RIGHT NOW. You can decide to change it in a year or 10 years. You can keep your maiden name legally but go by your husband's name socially. There are a lot of options and just because you don't change it now, it doesn't mean you can't change your mind in the future. 

kelsey+brandon

Definitely changing my last name. I want to have the same name as our children. People mispronounce FI's last name all the time (they say fear instead of fur), but I'm planning on changing that!

janeash

Changing my last name.  I love my name now, but I love his last name too and I agree with Kelsey....I want the same last name as my children.

If my name sounded awful with his last name, I maybe wouldn't change it.....it's all personal preference, I think!

Not sure how easy it's going to be to change my signature though!

MoonlightSilver

I am keeping my own and adding my FI's to it, but NOT hyphenating. So I'll have two last names.

I'm extremely proud of my own last name and the heritage it has in my state, so I refuse to give it up. I also want to show that I'm joining with my FI, though, so I'll take his too. I'm about 99% sure I convinced him to do the same.

I'll use both socially (one or the other or both, it doesn't matter).

midgetthemighty

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:efc4973a-6895-4681-94cf-69a57c35ee07Post:66bd0fe4-d7e2-4599-8975-a2bed11f5566">Re: Last name change</a>:
[QUOTE]Changing my last name.  I love my name now, but I love his last name too and I agree with Kelsey....I want the same last name as my children. If my name sounded awful with his last name, I maybe wouldn't change it.....it's all personal preference, I think! <strong>Not sure how easy it's going to be to change my signature though!
</strong>Posted by janeash[/QUOTE]

I've been practicing my new signature for MONTHS. Sometimes FI asks to see it because he's adorable like that.

Jessica632011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:efc4973a-6895-4681-94cf-69a57c35ee07Post:f3686943-e962-4394-ba44-d1674f51cf53">Re: Last name change</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>Definitely changing my last name. I want to have the same name as our children</strong>. People mispronounce FI's last name all the time (they say fear instead of fur), but I'm planning on changing that! :)
Posted by kelsey+brandon[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>Same exact thing here! Even his closest friends mispronounce his last name so I defiantly plan on changing that!</div>

acaponi87

I love my last name and I'm sad to lose it but it's important to me to take FI's name. It will be our family name. I don't know why but it's something that I'm really traditional about.

sleblanc72

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:efc4973a-6895-4681-94cf-69a57c35ee07Post:350d49d8-64ea-48c5-bc59-107ab986981a">Re: Last name change</a>:
[QUOTE]You should do whatever you feel you want to do, not whichever answer gets the most votes. Asking is fine, I just want to make sure you're not going to just go with the majority vote.
Posted by midgetthemighty[/QUOTE]
Agreed.<div>
</div><div>OP I will be changing my last name because it is what I want to do and no one made me feel like any decision I made was going to be the wrong one.</div>

biogal73

Hey everyone. Thanks for your replies.

Of course, I'm not basing my decision on the outcome of the poll!

I just like to hear other brides' rationales for their decision.  I have good reasons for keeping my name and good reasons for changing. 

Good reasons for keeping:  I'm the last in my family with the name, I'm well known professionally by my own name, it is easier (is that a good reason?).

Good reasons for switching:  It is less confusing when children come into the picture, my fiance would love it, I prefer his last name to mine

Hypenating: I like this option in general because professionally people would still recognize my current name, but my fiance is from another culture where they hyphenate groom-bride instead of the American bride-groom.  So either option sounds weird to one of us.

So, I'll contine to waffle away....

sleblanc72

If you're well known by it professionally do you also have publications and such in your name?

I feel like we have a couple of girls on this board who are not changing their names legally for that reason but will be using it socially, or something along those lines.

Kfudge0714

Definitely changing my last name.. I am so sick of people asking if Fudge is really my last name!! yes, it is... why on earth would I use a fake one?!?!?

BrooklynNovia

I am definitely changing my last name and super excited for it.  I'll be overstating my name to complete strangers and hotel staff during our honeymoon. 

cwill6212

I am changing my last name... And keeping it! I actually HATE my middle name... always have... So, I am dropping the middle name, moving my last name to the middle and taking my hubby's last name. FI keeps saying that my middle name is "on death row". He is so funny :P

midgetthemighty

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:efc4973a-6895-4681-94cf-69a57c35ee07Post:81d1507a-a158-4b00-b035-a9d02ca295ab">Re: Last name change</a>:
[QUOTE]I am definitely changing my last name and super excited for it.  I'll be overstating my name to complete strangers and hotel staff during our honeymoon. 
Posted by BrooklynNovia[/QUOTE]

Haha I'll probably do the same thing! We'll be wearing "Just Married" pins in Disney so that should be super fun.

kks4471

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:efc4973a-6895-4681-94cf-69a57c35ee07Post:6196dd6e-61f6-490b-9935-2ddb0afe2926">Re: Last name change</a>:
[QUOTE]I love my last name and I'm sad to lose it but it's important to me to take FI's name. It will be our family name. I don't know why but it's something that I'm really traditional about.
Posted by acaponi87[/QUOTE]

This is me too.  I'm sad to lose my last name, but excited to start our new family together with his name.  I don't care for hyphens, but that's just my personal preference.

diamondx423

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:efc4973a-6895-4681-94cf-69a57c35ee07Post:6196dd6e-61f6-490b-9935-2ddb0afe2926">Re: Last name change</a>:
[QUOTE]I love my last name and I'm sad to lose it but it's important to me to take FI's name. It will be our family name. I don't know why but it's something that I'm really traditional about.
Posted by acaponi87[/QUOTE]

This. Plus, science-wise I'm not really published enough for the change to hurt me. I put a ton of thought into this; and to be honest I'm still not 100% sure. I keep telling FI I'm going to flip a coin.

[Deleted User]

I am hyphenating, and I am trying to convince FI to do the same. I feel bad for our kids, but our names sound really nice together.

daria24

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:efc4973a-6895-4681-94cf-69a57c35ee07Post:2745cb97-b909-4523-86ad-d5f060412ffd">Re: Last name change</a>:
[QUOTE]Hey everyone. Thanks for your replies. Of course, I'm not basing my decision on the outcome of the poll! :) I just like to hear other brides' rationales for their decision.  I have good reasons for keeping my name and good reasons for changing.  Good reasons for keeping:  I'm the last in my family with the name, I'm well known professionally by my own name, it is easier (is that a good reason?). Good reasons for switching:  It is less confusing when children come into the picture, my fiance would love it, I prefer his last name to mine Hypenating: I like this option in general because professionally people would still recognize my current name, but my fiance is from another culture where they hyphenate groom-bride instead of the American bride-groom.  So either option sounds weird to one of us. So, I'll contine to waffle away....
Posted by biogal73[/QUOTE]

<div>My reasons for not changing my name are:</div><div>-I have 7 years experience in my profession with my last name, I work in a business that is almost all networking/personal references, so if someone said "hey have you worked with Daria HisLastName they would be like 'who'? Plus most people google your name/credits so that would be messed up</div><div>
</div><div>-I personally think changing your name is patriarchal-I'm not saying that women who change their name are "bad feminists", it is just what I think is best for me and my principles. </div><div>
</div><div>-We are not having children, if we were I would probably feel differently about having a "family" name</div><div>
</div><div>-And yes, changing your name is a PITA, but that is a minor reason</div><div>
</div><div>-We did talk about both of us hyphenating our last names, and his response was "Why would I change my name." Well, then why would I change my name? </div><div>
</div>

Shelly527IN

In Response to <a href="http://forums.weddingchannel.com/main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:efc4973a-6895-4681-94cf-69a57c35ee07Post:7767f6bc-d81b-430c-ab50-f20c08eb7d34">Re: Last name change</a>:
[QUOTE]I am changing my last name... And keeping it! :) I actually HATE my middle name... always have<strong>... So, I am dropping the middle name, moving my last name to the middle and taking my hubby's last name.</strong> FI keeps saying that my middle name is "on death row". He is so funny :P
Posted by cwill6212[/QUOTE]


That's exaclty what I want to do!  I didn't know exactly how it worked.  I love my last name and don't want to give it up, but want to take FI's name too.  This is a great compromise!

Carebear62584

I am changing mine.  My current last name will become my middle name.  It just seems that's how things are done in my family.  Since I am still applying for jobs (it's been 3 years and interviews in quite a few different school districts) I still want my name to be recognized so I will put it as my middle name on my resume and applications.

Devastatedangel

When my FI and I get married in June, he's going to be taking my last name. I did't want to change my last name because then may families last name would end with me. It also helped that my FI doesn't care for his last name and understands why I wouldn't want my last name to be a tree.

MissyB1313

Taking my FI's name.. It was really  important to him that I did, and I didn't care either way. So I compromised. Professionally I'm only known by my first name, so it doesn't matter that way. I just didn't want to do because its a PITA. 

MiksChick23

Definitely changing.  I like my name, but I want to have the same name as my children, like many of the PP. My name is always mispronounced, and so is his, so there is no difference there!

SheilaDancer43

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_last-name-change?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:efc4973a-6895-4681-94cf-69a57c35ee07Post:2745cb97-b909-4523-86ad-d5f060412ffd">Re: Last name change</a>:
[QUOTE]Good reasons for keeping:  I'm the last in my family with the name
Posted by biogal73[/QUOTE]

I am also the last in my family, and no boys. I love my current name, but I have always known I would take my FH's name. It was never a question for me. At first, I was trying to decide if I should keep my middle name and just change my last name (I really like my middle name: it sounds good w/ both my current name and my future last name, and my middle name is named after a family friend who actually introduced my parents). I have since decided that I want to make my last name my middle name, and take FI's last name. This way I still feel like I am keeping my Dad's family name alive (in a way). Also, I want to use my maiden name as our boy's middle name, and I might use my middle name as a daughter's middle name.

I understand your reasonings professionally though!

smittojess88

I can not WAIT to change mine. My last name is Judy, yes just like the first name as I've spent so many wasted hours of my life explaining that on the phone, at the bank, at the doctor, etc etc. people ask me how to spell it , call me Judy (then I guess they're assuming my last name is Jessica??). As you can tell its a somewhat touchy subject I'm sad to lose the name as I'm the last in the family but I can't take it anymore! On a side note, my grandma was born Judy Lamb, married a Judy and became Judy Judy.. That's dedication!

MMRoberts11

I'll be changing mine.  My last name is WAY too common.  Yes I'll have publications and grants under my maiden name but I don't care, the grants are just about over and I  can just change my name on them too.  Beyond that, I don't have any strong connections to my last name so that's another reason I want to change it.

[Deleted User]

I really like my name now. I'm attached to both my middle and last names, but I'm changing my last name because I want our family all to have the same name. I'll be sad to see my last name go since there are only two male cousins in my generation to carry the name on. 

Hyphenating would sound silly with our last names though. I know a girl who kept them all, but it would be so long! I can't come up with a good reason for myself to keep all of the names.