Bridesmaidzilla?

futuremrsbecerra

OMG, is there such thing as a bridesmaidzilla? If so, i think i have one. She is texting me everyday all day about the bach. party thats still over a month away. She is not even in charge of the bach. party my MOH is but she is taking over everything. then on sat. i went out with her and my mom and she asked if all of the wedding party is getting ready for the wedding all together and i said no bc there is not enough room where i am getting ready for everyone and their extras. so she is mad about that but she really stresses me out and i don't want to be stressed the day of.

I haven't really gotten stressed about my wedding (yet) but she is really stressing me out with being a bridesmaidzilla. I just can't imagine what she will be like the day of.
I need some tips on how to handle her without going on the deep end and flipping out on her.

SoSaysTara

Do any of your other BMs know her well?  I have a BMzilla but my MOH is handling her for me!  It's nice because then I don't have to worry about it.. I have my built it buffer!

daria24

Eh, compared to a lot of behavior I see on these boards she doesn't sound that bad.

Just set boundaries with her. Don't answer her phone calls/texts right away. If she is pestering you, say "BM, I'm very busy at the moment, but I will get back to you by X date. Until then I can't help you." Day of, if you aren't getting ready with her, you won't have much opportunity for her to stress you out. Give your phone to someone else that day and ask them to let you know if there is anything urgent you need to take care of. Otherwise no texts or calls on the wedding day. 

Think about it this way, you could be one of the girls on these boards complaining that her BM dropped off the face of the earth and won't return any calls/texts. 

Elizabeth80

This exactly!! My sis was kind of stressing me at first but compared to some of my other BM's who went MIA for a little bit she has been a god send. Daria is right. Though annoying it could be a lot worse.

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_bridesmaidzilla?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:fbd555a0-7e2b-4c6d-8405-8d570eb4c255Post:34ca746f-dfd2-4a7c-93d3-2321f440e57a">Re: Bridesmaidzilla?</a>:
[QUOTE]Eh, compared to a lot of behavior I see on these boards she doesn't sound that bad. Just set boundaries with her. Don't answer her phone calls/texts right away. If she is pestering you, say "BM, I'm very busy at the moment, but I will get back to you by X date. Until then I can't help you." Day of, if you aren't getting ready with her, you won't have much opportunity for her to stress you out. Give your phone to someone else that day and ask them to let you know if there is anything urgent you need to take care of. Otherwise no texts or calls on the wedding day.  <strong>Think about it this way, you could be one of the girls on these boards complaining that her BM dropped off the face of the earth and won't return any calls/texts. 
</strong>Posted by daria24[/QUOTE]

futuremrsbecerra

You guys are right. It could be worse. I'll just have to give my phone to someone else or turn it off the day of.

melntaitt

I have a MOHzilla; she chose the dress then decided she hated it after everyone bought it and did her own thing, she is consistently late (as in has not shown up to not one appointment on time) and was threatening to pull her son (the RB) out of the wedding if I didn't meet her demands. She's calmer now, but it takes alot of time and patience to deal with the crazies in the WP.

I wish I could find the gene or cause of what makes WP members go nuts during the process - I'm going to contract LittleLuckyPenny and we're going to become millionaires!

If I find the gene that makes brides crazy we'll be billionaires! Don't get me wrong - I'm not talking about that appointment where you sob over the centerpieces after the dress appointment goes wrong. I'm talking about firing a bridesmaid for not being skinny enough to be in your wedding.

precamies

I kind of have the opposite problem. my bridesmaid seems to be really happy for us and the wedding, but it is a pain to get her to do anything. and I'm not talking about helping me, I'm doing everything myself. I'm talking about getting her out of the house to go find her a BM dress. we have 8 weeks to go and she has no idea what she's wearing. and now I also found out that she has bought concert tickets out of town on the evening before the wedding day. I guess someone is not attending the rehearsal then...? She's my future sister in law, and I really, seriously love her. But she's such an airhead at times. I don't think her mom knows anything about that concert, because I don't think she would be going then haha. She's twenty, single, pregnant and living with her parents. They have all rights to enforce some discipline (again), since she wouldn't survive anywhere else. So I'm thinking the whole concert thing might slip for me at some point if I don't work up some more patience with her.

Zimsgirl

My two sisters (MOHs and my triplet sisters) have been great. My older sister just acts like she doesn't care which is sad

brittneyh4

I would stop talking wedding with her. There is no reason for her to be mad that you aren't all getting ready together. It seems kind of silly? If it were me I would be thrilled, that way I could get ready on my own time... and sleep in a little! My poor BMs are getting up early, but we're all morning people lol

I just went to a wedding this last weekend that was supposed to start at 1pm, and one of the BM (the one my FI walked with) didn't show up til 1:10... sigh.

precamies

Zims...hold on... how many sisters exactly do you have? and do you have any brothers? My FI is from a large family but they are all boys except for one. the teen years were nuts, so I hear

michelletobin

I have a different problem with one of my BM (my cousin) too. She never makes it to anything and she didn't show up the day all the girls picked up their dresses and tried them on, so I haven't even seen her in her dress. She is way closer to  my sister (even though as kids her and I were inseperatable) and so she is going through my sister for everything, which i guess is good, but apparently she has complaints about the cost of stuff, we are having an OOT wedding, but she hasn't said anything to me. She hasn't spoken to me in over a month???? Now apparently she doesnt know what she is going to do with her 5 kids when she goes to the wedding? She has know about this for 8 months now. It is strange how there can be Bridesmaidzillas and BM who just simply don't seem interested, why did they accept the position is they didn't want to be involved?

futuremrsbecerra

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_bridesmaidzilla?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:fbd555a0-7e2b-4c6d-8405-8d570eb4c255Post:7cc0287a-b958-4e10-91d7-472b67f06f97">Re: Bridesmaidzilla?</a>:
[QUOTE]I have a different problem with one of my BM (my cousin) too. She never makes it to anything and she didn't show up the day all the girls picked up their dresses and tried them on, so I haven't even seen her in her dress. She is way closer to  my sister (even though as kids her and I were inseperatable) and so she is going through my sister for everything, which i guess is good, but apparently she has complaints about the cost of stuff, we are having an OOT wedding, but she hasn't said anything to me. She hasn't spoken to me in over a month???? Now apparently she doesnt know what she is going to do with her 5 kids when she goes to the wedding? She has know about this for 8 months now. It is strange how there can be Bridesmaidzillas and BM who just simply don't seem interested, why did they accept the position is they didn't want to be involved?
Posted by michelletobin[/QUOTE]


I agree. I have both extremes. I have a bm who has not been to anything. i haven't talked to her (otherthen small texts to make sure she has her dress) and i have a sister who i feel is like pulling teeth for her to help me do diy projects. then i have a sil who is the bmzilla. everyday i get a text from her regarding some aspect of the wedding. never fails. i feel like she sometimes gets it in her head that the wedding is for her. she prob. is living vicariously through me. I have not been stressed about this wedding but she is making me stressed with her after talking to her.

I also feel bad for my MOH bc this bmzilla is taking over my bach. party plans and not letting my moh host it. UGH!!!