NWR: But I need some LOVE

aricherry

School starts next week, and since my ex has rights to pick my baby up from school, she will start going back to his house.  My husband expects me to stop this some kind of way, but I can not.  I have already kept her ALL summer because he is not stable, does drugs, and he is not responsible at all.  Also, he does not respect my wishes with her at all (from her medicines that she needs, to the language used around her, to not irritating her allergies to anything I have a problem with, he goes against me.)  He lives with his parents (dad is convicted drug offender, mom is alcoholic who cursed my baby out the last time she was there and told her F me and I am a B! to my 6 yr old! who does that?)

I am fully aware that I should have taken him to court, but my lawyer moves so slow.  I used to go pick my daughter up early from school to avoid her visits with him, but I mean school is just starting I just want to leave well enough alone.  I am totally against her going there but what can I do? Sometimes I wish that I had never met my ex, but I did and now we have to deal with it.  Guys please just pray for me.  I am going to lose it next week when she leaves for the 1st time in 4 months.  I just want what is best for my baby and sometimes I wish my hubby were her dad.

NeColeMonet

Why don't you try contacting the police department or social services and seeing what they can do hun?  It won't be good for your daughter to have been in a great environment all summer long and then to go back there.  How verbal is she?  Does she show a spirit of enthusiasm or lack thereof when you mention her going back?  I will definitely keep you and your baby girl in my prayers. I have a six year old son and I couldn't imagine being in the same situation (especially since he's Autistic and doesn't talk much).  God Bless.

prettymami2

Wow that's upsetting to hear. My FI's son is in a similiar circumstance. He hates sending his son back to his mother but what choices do you have. Can't you get some type of restraints on the situation? Explaining to the courts that you fear for her safety and speak specificially to the circumstances in their home. Bump a lawyer girl you can do some of this on your own. Believe me I now. Although I am in the DC area, some rules remain the same. Especially when it comes to the welfare of a child.

prncsz

I agree with pp see if there is some kind of way around that. I hate that your child has to be caught in the middle of this. Please do something so visitation can stop that's just not a healthy environment for her. I don't think it's every ok for an adult to curse at a child whether it's meanly at them or relating to their parents and you never talk that way to a child to begin with. I will definitely keep you all in my prayers. Once you all are married is it possible to move out of state another city or something?

PB-Bride2010

WOW...I agree with the pp...get your child out of that environment and try to go around your lawyer, who isn't doing anything to help you.  However, I will keep you, husband, and your child lifted up in prayer!!!

MAGNUM06

My heart goes out to you and your family... I know this is a difficult situation from beginning to end... BUT you CAN do something.....
*You can contact the courts to see what the next course of action is...if you dont let her go. 
*You can get another lawyer... Remember, this situation is not as important to anyone else as it is to you!!!
*You can contact child protective services and report the home, you said his father is a CONVICTED drug offender and his mother is an ALCOHOLIC.... If those things are documentented and verifiable... there is something YOU can do!!!! 
*You can report his suspected drug use.
*You can challenge his fitness as a parent
Dont get discouraged so easily..... You have the support of your FI.... Do what you do and make it happen for the well-being of your child....
Time to put your big girl shoes on now... and MAKE IT HAPPEN!!!!

Sidebar:  Your husband IS her dad!!!!  He loves her, accepts her as HIS own, love you and takes care of all of you..... Nothing else matters!!!!

I'm not sure if you've taken any of these steps already and I'm surely not trying to step on any toes.... but you gotta make it happen by ANY MEANS NECESSARY!!!!  This is your baby and you gotta fight!!! 

I feel certain that all of us on the board with stand in the gap and lift every prayer for you and on your behalf.....But prayer without works is dead.... HTH!!!!

Try to remain encouraged... That this will get better!!!!

luckyinloveaz

I agree with all that has been said, if you are dead set on using the lawyer you have you must keep a fire lit under his or her ass!!!

Go down to the courts and talk to the visitation dept and see what they say, I know with child support you can request a hearing to get things changed. My mom works for the court system her in Az so I know you can get things done. You just have to keep on it and it will all work out!!