Bridesmaid Meeting

brandidt84

Hey ladies I am just so excited to really start getting things on a roll. So I want to plan a bridesmaid meeting by the end of the month but i'm not quite sure on some of the topic that needs to be discussed. I know I have to talk about the hair, dress, shoes, and color. But is their anything else that needs to be discussed. Also did you ladies have a bridesmaid meeting? 

Tamikaw21

I just had a bridesmaid meeting last night....Ii didn't quite turn out how I planned, which kind of upset me a little....1 BM joked around the entire time, 1 BM was so indecisive...SMH...I just sent out a group email, covering aspects that I didn't get to make clear last night....Hopefully I get a better outcome....

But the meetings are neccessary...to make sure everyone is on the same page...we went over how I want the venue decorated and who's assigned to what, times and transportation, hair, makeup, shoes, etc....I basically gave them a rundown of my whole wedding planning notebook....

Misskin

I haven't planned any meetings yet, but I do plan on sending monthly emails out now that my Wedding is a few months away(august).  Each email will provide an update on my wedding planning, and any task that I may need them to complete. 

[Deleted User]

There's no need for a meeting, but it's always nice to get together with friends. Bridesmaids only responsibility is to show up on time, purchase the appropriate outfit and help keep you calm on your big day. It's also nice if they plan a bridal shower or bachelorette party. I didn't have a bridesmaid meeting because all of my girls lived in different states. I communicated via group emails and phone calls.  The main thing to discuss is attire and address any concerns that they may have. 

I'd shy away from assigning duties to them like decorating venues or helping with any DIY projects. If they want to help, they will offer.  Everyone that I know in real life who tried to assign projects to the wedding party was always disappointed. Either the projects weren't done correctly or people dropped the ball, etc. It always caused a riff and affected friendships. 

Carla1019

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_bridesmaid-meeting?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:541efb74-bf83-4c8b-8bd7-c964e5602de5Post:8b00d57c-8be3-41aa-b31e-ade600f4223d">Re: Bridesmaid Meeting</a>:
[QUOTE]There's no need for a meeting, but it's always nice to get together with friends. Bridesmaids only responsibility is to show up on time, purchase the appropriate outfit and help keep you calm on your big day. It's also nice if they plan a bridal shower or bachelorette party. I didn't have a bridesmaid meeting because all of my girls lived in different states. I communicated via group emails and phone calls.  The main thing to discuss is attire and address any concerns that they may have. <strong>I'd shy away from assigning duties to them like decorating venues or helping with any DIY projects. If they want to help, they will offer.  Everyone that I know in real life who tried to assign projects to the wedding party was always disappointed.</strong> Either the projects weren't done correctly or people dropped the ball, etc. It always caused a riff and affected friendships. 
Posted by winniethepiglet[/QUOTE]

This!!!

I would feel upset if a friend of mine "assigned" me to help decorate her venue. Bridesmaids are already spending money to buy dresses they may never wear again and give you gifts. 

I sent my BM an e-mail letting them know that I'm having someone make their dresses and how much it will cost. I will assign a deadline that they need to get measured so the seamstress will have enough time.
 

mandydc0509

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_bridesmaid-meeting?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:400Discussion:541efb74-bf83-4c8b-8bd7-c964e5602de5Post:8b00d57c-8be3-41aa-b31e-ade600f4223d">Re: Bridesmaid Meeting</a>:
[QUOTE]There's no need for a meeting, but it's always nice to get together with friends. Bridesmaids only responsibility is to show up on time, purchase the appropriate outfit and help keep you calm on your big day. It's also nice if they plan a bridal shower or bachelorette party. I didn't have a bridesmaid meeting because all of my girls lived in different states. I communicated via group emails and phone calls.  The main thing to discuss is attire and address any concerns that they may have.  I'd shy away from assigning duties to them like decorating venues or helping with any DIY projects. If they want to help, they will offer.  Everyone that I know in real life who tried to assign projects to the wedding party was always disappointed. Either the projects weren't done correctly or people dropped the ball, etc. It always caused a riff and affected friendships. 
Posted by winniethepiglet[/QUOTE]

This exactly.

We haven't really had meetings.. When we get together to eat/catch-up, they'll ask me how things are going, but I try to make sure the conversation about my wedding is as short as possible. Most of the wedding talk is via email.

So far, the only thing I've asked everyone to do was go pick out/get fitted for their dress, and I asked my matron of honor (after she offered to help the hostess with the bridal shower) to give the wedding party a call to get a final count on who would be able/wanted to help plan the shower so that my hostess could get better organized.  I've also asked for advice on accessories, shoes, etc, but that's just a quick email.

As the pp said, by what I've seen, assigning tasks seems be at the root of a lot of  BP drama. If they offer to help, that's great, but utilize your vendors, coordinators (aka hired help) as much as possible.

happe2gether

I tend to agree with PP - unless you REALLY think it is going to be a problem, I would skip a meeting and especially assignments.  

I personally am doing BM newsletters because NOBODY is here with me.  So just as the best way for me to communicate with them, I send one every few months with updates if I have any.  So far it has worked out fine. 

2010Bride2be

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_bridesmaid-meeting?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:541efb74-bf83-4c8b-8bd7-c964e5602de5Post:8b00d57c-8be3-41aa-b31e-ade600f4223d">Re: Bridesmaid Meeting</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>There's no need for a meeting,</strong> but it's always nice to get together with friends. Bridesmaids only responsibility is to show up on time, purchase the appropriate outfit and help keep you calm on your big day. It's also nice if they plan a bridal shower or bachelorette party. I didn't have a bridesmaid meeting because all of my girls lived in different states. I communicated via group emails and phone calls.  The main thing to discuss is attire and address any concerns that they may have.  <strong>I'd shy away from assigning duties to them like decorating venues or helping with any DIY projects. If they want to help, they will offer.</strong>  Everyone that I know in real life who tried to assign projects to the wedding party was always disappointed. Either the projects weren't done correctly or people dropped the ball, etc. It always caused a riff and affected friendships. 
Posted by winniethepiglet[/QUOTE]

This.

There is no need for a meeting. They are adults. You can send them an email or communicate with them in person in regards to the attire, location, and times. Thats really their only responsiblity. Any decoration of the venue should be done by you, designated family member or wedding coordinator. If your BM's want to help, they will offer.

My BM's were scattered all over the east coast and I found that an email worked just fine. They were given their dress and shoe options via email. Hotel, church, rehearsal, rehearsal dinner/location, and day of information was send via email. Everyone had what they needed and was where they needed to be, when they needed to be there.

kikilay17

i had a bridesmaid meeting it was a blast none my ladies have been BM's before nor been to a wedding im the first one to get married(the last one anyone expected). Most of my girls are always like what do u need me to do what can i do to help and we all enjoy hanging out together...i had everyone come over we all had a glass of moscotto some choclate covered strawberries went over hair, make up the dress, stuffed my invitations in the box gossiped and had a good time. i was even more excited about the wedding after they left....im looking forward to our next big meeting in march 

Elizabeth80

I like the idea of meeting up to discuss things like wedding details and where you are with your planning. But due to time and its almost to your benefit to do emails .

I have been sending out emails to BM's with any updates. I have tried to make them infrequent so it would not be overwhelming. So far so good. I'm trying to pace myself by sending out info but with it being less then 5 months away and deadlines coming up its a little hard not to get trigger happy:-)