African American Weddings

My BMs...smh !

1st let me ask a question...Why is it that when you call ya girls (who are mesirable in their own relationships) just to vent or get a different perspective about something thats going on in your relationship they are all ears and just eating up the drama but when you happy and everything is going good and you want to talk about the good stuff the sending you straight to VM or not returning txt ?

So just about a month ago. I made an appt for them to go get fitted for their dresses and everybody confirmed that the day and time was good. Then on that day they all had something come up except MOH. Ok life happens..I get that. They all called and txt saying Im go this week..ima go next week. blah blah blah. I txted them Thursday and said With the holidays coming up I want you girls to try and get in to get yall dresses so yall wont have to worry about it. Its Monday and not a word I have heard from the. 

I have told them several times if being in the wedding is something you cant handle or just dont want to do just let me know. I dont want to put any type of strains on yall. They all said no, girl gone, we in the wedding and blah blah blah. 

BM #1 she is having issues with her BD which he is a groomsmen and she doesn want to walk down the aisle with him..ok we can fix that
BM#2 she is having realtionship issues and dont know if she coming or going
BM#3 she just got a bunch of issues going in general.

I realize that nobody will be as happy as you are about getting married and that it seems your relationship is going better when there's isnt. But rather Im going thru some bad times I am genuinely happy when they are going thru good times. 

For instants..I told BM#1 not to date GM#1 I gave her his warning signs, side effects or whatever and she just had to talk to him. Now they over there fighting, arguing and whatever else. uggghhh ! Lawd help me

ok rant over !

Re: My BMs...smh !

  • I definitely understand where you are coming from. Weddings and funerals bring out the worst in people. In this situation you will definitely find out who your will friends are. I started out with 5 bridesmaids and ended up having 2 on my wedding day. I now know who my real friends are and had to let some people go. Dont harrass them, if they really want to be there for you they will without any problems. Good luck girl.
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  • Smh..girl..im just like seriously tho..at least say im cool..i dont want to be it. But im going to give them til the deadline Dec15. If no deps or made then dont worry about it ! I just figure less thank you gifts I have to buy and food and drink !
  • You know what they say... people dont want to see you happy... They are MORE THAN HAPPY to bring you down to where they are...

    I think all we can do is Pray for our friends.. you know... I know (I am not perfect.. and I can have my moments)... BUT... I DO TRY TO BE CONSIDERATE OF THEIR FEELINGS..

    Out of three... two have actually ordered their dresses... The last one... you know what.. I told her I know she is tired of hearing me ask... because I am tired of asking.... lol..(yes I said it just like that)... IF she doesn't order the dress.. you know what... that means all the times she keeps sayin (no girl... i want to be there).. she really didnt mean it... I am just not stressing over it... I can't .. I have too much other stuff to do...

    I always have that lil bit of hope in the back of my mind that she will bring up the dress (not me) and say she is ready to order it... The day has come and GONE.. for when I wanted them ordered by... shoot...we still have shoes and accessories to pick out...
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_my-bmssmh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:400Discussion:58cbc416-9e57-4ace-ad97-4d0acda5ada8Post:9cc87284-9cf4-4fe3-a207-979ad48aade2">Re: My BMs...smh !</a>:
    [QUOTE]I definitely understand where you are coming from. <strong>Weddings and funerals bring out the worst in people.</strong> In this situation you will definitely find out who your will friends are. I started out with 5 bridesmaids and ended up having 2 on my wedding day. I now know who my real friends are and had to let some people go. Dont harrass them, if they really want to be there for you they will without any problems. Good luck girl.
    Posted by sheikscorpio88[/QUOTE]

    THIS!

    I don't understand it really. I mean if you gonna be there for me, be there 100%. 1 of mine dropped out- mostly because i was tired of hearing her complain about fiance and I wedding, and my bff apparently has had a problem with me for years. <-- i'm holding out on her. I'm hoping we can work it out after everything is said and done, but if our "season" is over, then so be it.
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  • Drop them broads cuz let them do them and u will have no one but MOH on wedding day....u don't have the time.....inform them that if dresses haven't been ordered by YOUR deadline....too not worry about it and then if u can....recruit dependable ones....and yeah it can be done.. My cousin did it and it worked out well
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  • edited November 2012
    Wow that is almost the same thing I'm going through!! I started off with 5 and for now I only have 2. its like when it was time for everybody to step up they all had an excuse even though in the beginning everryyboddy was down for anything smh!
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