African American Weddings

wedding guestlist is falling apart vent

FI's family has lost their minds. His BM has been acting a fool and FI';s family went behind his back and would pick up his son and not tell him. he asked them to not pick him up and deal with BM directly, that she needs to learn that HE is his parent and she has to deal with him. lng story short, FI had to call the police on BM xmas eve because he hadnt talked to his son in weeks and they did a wellness check. we FINALLY got his son today after THREE MONTHS!!! just to find out that FI's parents and brothers picked up the boy on xmas eve and spent xmas with him, and have probably been picking him up behind FI's back this whole time...and didnt even call FI. RAGGEDY aint even the word. oh, did i mentionm step sons birthday is on xmas?? yeah...didnt even get to see his baby on his bday. they have told my step son that his dad doesnt love him anymore, he is going to make a new family and doesnt want to be his dad anymore and that they are really his parents. They tell him to be bad at his mommas house so she wont want him anymore and he can live with them. so clearly, they are F-ING NUTS and can stay the hell away from me before i clock alllllll the way out on them. They make him sound like some deadbeat dad who doesnt want nothing to do with his son, which isnt the case at all. BM is a dumba$s and so is his family, and they both feed off each other's drama loving selves.

do u know my FMIL told me as i was standing there in my wedding dress that she wasnt coming to my wedding? all cuz she was mad at FI. silly...i know.

Anyway, needless to say, they aint coming to the wedding. like not even invited. they have crossed a line there is no coming back from. So FI has lost his best man, and a groomsman and we have lost his parents as guests. Ive also cut some people off the guestlist just for getting on my nerves. We only invited 71 people, but we know most of them wont show. now im worried that we are gunna mess around and have like 4 people there! all this hard work for what?!

Re: wedding guestlist is falling apart vent

  • Omg. So sorry you and FI have to deal with this. BM drama is off the chain around these parts. Guess I will quit complaining.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • i work for child support....i deal with baby mommas alllll day, they dont even phase me anymore. i expect them to act silly....its the family that im blown away with!
  • Im soooo sorry to hear that u have to deal with that mess. I totally understand what you are going through. I have never had drama with his family but the BM drama has been non stop for 7 years. So like I said I totally understand. You and your fiance are just going to have to look past the ignorance and move on. I know, easier said than done. Obviously these people are clearly miserable and you know what they say, "Misery loves company" And as far as the child, I feel sorry for him. Don"t worry because his son will some day see what they are doing and what they dont realize is that he's gonna end up disliking them. Me and FI have both been dealing with miserable ex's for 7 years now and we both have kids involved. You and FI just have to stay strong for each other and take it one day at a time. If yall end up only having 2  people attend your ceremony, Guess what, thats their loss because at the end of the day yall still gone be happy and thats all that matters.
    Mrs. Mosley 2 be
  • Chels..... don't stress over the negativity . You are going to have the people that are most important making the trip with you. I'm sorry you have to deal with all that.. because after the wedding LIFE continues with all these different people and personalities.. I'm praying for positive resolution.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Ditto with Nursing. Sorry you are going through this.
    Daisypath Wedding tickers LilySlim Fitness goals tickers
  • yall, im not even worried about the family. im quick to cut people off and not feel bad about it. i just feel bad for FI....his family did this and now they have to be out of his life. this isnt the way he wanted it but he has asked repeatedly for them to cooperate when it comes to his son and they just refuse. they look at him like a punk, because clearly they just dont care what he says or asks of him. im so ready to go over there and tell everyone about them selves and remind them what kind of low-nothin @ss human beings they are. the problem with them is they have never been told about themselves and think they can do whatever they want in this world with no consequence. im just so tired of them thinking they can do whatever they want. they think they can run his life and his son. well now im part of his life, and NO ONE runs my life but they really have a problem with it.

    He isnt like me, he takes stuff to heart, especially when it comes to family. Im frustrated because i wish he could just brush them off and keep it moving, but i know not everyobe can be that way so i have to keep reminding myself of that. But like i told him its OUR day, and if only 2 people show up, it wont matter, we are still getting married. but it would be nice if people knew how to act so they could be there to witness and support us.
  • Its the differences between you two that make u two work sooo well.. you continuing to support him and have his back... u will maybe rub off on him... he has to remember this is HIS SON AND HIS RELATIONSHIP between them that is in jeopardy... I pray he continues to grow stronger and take control of the situation... they will probably continue until he stands up for himself... NOT U.. BUT HIM.. I think if u try to fix the a way its like u running things instead of their eyes.. u know.. Its always a tough situation when kids r involved
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Im agree with Nursing all the way. Once he stands up and speaks his peace they will back off. Let him handle it and on his on time his bubble of frustrantion will burst and when it hunny. All hell will break loose. I dont understand how his own family can brainwash that baby not along work against both parents. If anything they should be helping your FI bulid a relationship with is son not tear it up. Your FI will have alot of work on hands to help son mentally. Ill be praying for you guys.
  • i'm sorry you are going through this.. i am praying that things turns around for you...
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Oh I'm not the only that's dealt with bm so sorry he was born into a bunch of assholes and had a baby by a more sorry that you're also dealing with.....everything happens for a reason, all ur planning is NOT for nothing....your day will still be beautiful, without the fools there to ruin it or cause drama
    ****The Future Mrs. Ikeard**** wedding countdown
  • I'm sorry hun
    577906 10151197172303105 844768324 n Follow Me on Pinterest Anniversary
  • thank you ladies. i dont get involved with these fools. sure i state me peice to FI when we are in our house...but i dont talk to these dummies. but they have started callimg me involving me and then wanna act all shocked when i tell them they are wrong and imALWAYS on his side and they have NO RIGHTS to his son, and whatever he feels is right for his son they have to deal with it, they dont have to like it...but they have to respect it. He cussed all of them out a couple weeks ago and they arent speaking to him now, which is more than ok with me. family or not, you dont need this kind of trash in your life and NO ONE has the right to treat you that way. After i found out they had my step son on xmas eve and my FI didnt even get to speak to him, i was done. they are not coming to my wedding. at all. they better not even come near me. He stands up for himself and they dont he has cut the cord. i honestly hope they NEVER come back around. Ive made it more than clear to FI they will NEVER see our children, im not exposing my kids to their poison. Theres not much i can do about his son....but when it comes to my kids? HELLLL no. These people are so incredible doing this to their own son.

    These are the type of people who LOVE drama and if they dont have drama they dont know what to do with themselves, They cant stand the fact that now that FI is with me, he isnt dealing with their drama. So they blame me and act like im taking him away from them, instead of realzing they are driving him away. but its cool....blame me. i dont mind being the bad guy...and i sure dont mind telling you the truth about yourselves. When i explained to his brother that FI doesnt want his child around him or his family he was looking all stupid and couldnt comprehend that that is HIS child, and you arent entitled to see HIS child.. They call themselves christians and are the most unlike christian like fools ive EVER seen.

    FI looked all sad last night and said he isnt having a bachelor party now, since his best man and groomsman was his brothers. So i am going to make it a point to make sure he has the best party ever. Im calling up my male friends and a couple of his cousins who arent crazy and we are going to give him the time of his life.
    He has no one now...its really sad. His best man was his twin brother and best friend....and he has lost both. But I think he is better off without them....with friends like that, you dont need enemies.
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards