Is anyone doing this....

Hinaj

My mom and I were talking this week and she brought this up and I was wondering if any of the desi brides are doing this or did it for their wedding.  Are you guys having a Trousseau (I think that's the word).  As in desi culture, you have new clothes, accessories, and so much other stuff  that you take with you when you get married....Is any one doing this?  When my cousins got married, this was done. My mom was telling me that we should get started with mine.   But I was wondering if in general it still happens.  If so what are you guys doing? 

meelabeela

I think my future in-laws will be gifting me a few outfits but I'm not really preparing anything for myself.  I've seen pictures of some weddings and it looks like the bride gets a lot of clothes and jewelry as gifts from her family and the groom's family at the mehndi.

jnsaini

Hi Hinaj
My parents are doing this, so yes my sister got loads of clothes and jewelry for her wedding and my parents are doing the same for me...its a tradition as far as I was told to get that when you get married, and some jewelry we get from uncles too as part of that. As for my future in laws, I dont know what will be given if anything at all. But its considered a huge part of getting married in my fam.
nicky

SonaliPop

Yes, the Gujarati community still very much does this.

It doesn't have to be just Indian clothes - just things you'd wear or need for your life after you are married. I have 3 punjabi suits so far as well as other saris and suits. Some of them should be things you have never worn. So for me, the punjabi suits were just purchased and won't be worn until the wedding has passed. They can give you things like jewelry, purses, western clothes, anything.

Our in-laws also give us things, such as jewelry - gold and diamonds, as well as clothes.

I really love this tradition because the meaning is so significant...your parents work to provide you with the things you'll need for your new life. Some people do 15 outfits or pieces, some do 21, it depends on the group. But it doesn't have to be saris. It can be light saris, lehngas, punjabi suits, etc.

Hinaj

I am glad I am not the only one here.  My mom was telling me there is this whole concept that now that you are starting in your new life, you should have new of everything.  She has started buying me household items, etc etc.  Just not even clothes and jeweleries.  I never maybe once in a year or maybe two would I wear any traditional clothing so her number of different traditional outfits is so high.  I just know that I wil never wear any of it.  I guess I will try steering her more toward western outfits and very few traditional ones. 

My mom wants us to wait till buying clothes closer to the wedding, so the clothes potray the curent fashion.  Are you ladies doing that as well?  I don't know much about current Indian fashion to really have an opinion?  Or did you guys just buy the style you really liked. 

Also, How much are you doing for your Trousseau?  Outfit?  etc etc.  I am wondering what would be an average or at least what would be over the top.  I have close family in Pakistan and I know they have already started buying me Jewelry and stuff and there are too many of them and including my mom who is too excited about this.  LOL.  Its a good thing I love shopping!! 

Where did you guys buy your outfits from?  Online? India? or Indian stores?  Sorry about so many questions, but I really don't know much about the topic except for what I have heard from my mom.   

SonaliPop

When it comes to my actual wedding outfit, I want to buy something that isn't a total trend - something timeless, because in our tradition, our outfits stick around for our whole lives and have to be worn again for certain occasions.

I was in Toronto and bought three of my pieces from there, some have been gifts from India, jewelry from here and there. A lot of it is Indian clothes. I think people also give make up and perfume, which I am also including. Since I'm moving in with my in-laws and their house is already decked out, I don't need to bring any home-goods, although my FMIL has given me free reign to decorate everything as I wish. I'm going to have shoes, dresses, all that, too.

The one part of this is the weird tradition I don't like, when you go to your in laws house and you show what your parents have given you. You are meant to do that to show everything but part of me feels like it's like, "Oh my parents love me THIS much"...I think I'd be more low key and not display it (like my cousins' wife did!) and happily show it to anybody who needed to see it.

Hinaj

OMG Sonali, my FI was telling about the last part and I really had a hard time believing him.  I guess he was right.  And that his mom (my FMIL) expects this to happen during the wedding.  All I was thinking that why does the whole world needs to see what I am taking and whatnot.  You are right I had the same feeling that its like measuring how much you parents love you in correlation with how much you have.  I am very uncomfortable with that idea.  I told him there is no way I am going to do that at the wedding.  If she wants to see, she can but I don't want to make this an exhibition.