South Asian Weddings

Black Tie Event

Should I put "black tie event" on my invites?  Indian people know to dress very formally for Indian weddings, but I'm afraid non-Indians won't know how to dress.  I strictly want any woman not wearing Indian clothes to have floor length gowns, which is why I want to put "black tie event" on the invites.  However, I don't want to confuse any Desis and make them think I'm asking them to wear a suit/tux instead of Indian clothing.

Passing the word around may not be the best solution, because its a pretty big wedding.  I don't imagine talking about dress code with every non-Indian person that will be coming to the wedding.

Re: Black Tie Event

  • edited December 2011
    Maybe a separate business-card-sized insert for the non-Indian guests?
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  • edited December 2011
    From my experience non-Indian people who come to an Indian wedding dress up only because they know Indians dress up, but you know your crowd. You may want to put Formal event or a different type of wording then "black tie event." It might help.
  • temurlangtemurlang member
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_south-asian-weddings_black-tie-event?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:430Discussion:e645c093-88ca-4760-a3f0-297647424f3dPost:93df1e9b-dcc0-4965-b649-7d8dfa71c73c">Re: Black Tie Event</a>:
    [QUOTE]From my experience non-Indian people who come to an Indian wedding dress up only because they know Indians dress up, but you know your crowd. You may want to put Formal event or a different type of wording then "black tie event." It might help.
    Posted by DFWIndian[/QUOTE]

    DFW is right... in my experience too most adults know they are supposed to dress up for weddings.  In my circle I think people would find it rude if you include the dress code, but we're from different parts of the country and it may be the norm in your region.

    I also think that when people are invited to an event outside their own culture, they're usually extra diligent about finding out what is appropriate to wear, and most people err on the side of conventional/formal.  But again you know your crowd.

    One more thing, I want to emphasize the same things as I did in your previous thread:  I think you should manage your expectations.  I don't know Florida, but here you just could not expect floor length gowns.  You're having a big wedding, so I'm thinking you have like 300 people?  Someone out of 300 will wear something you hate.  But with 300 people you may not even see that person.  Apparently, one of DH's friends wore leather pants and a transparent Cossack shirt at our wedding, but I didn't even notice!

    Also, 300 people must include some who aren't relatives or close friends.  Your and FI's co-workers, ladies from your mom's book club, dad's former boss, neighbors, etc.  It is unlikely any of them will buy an outfit for your wedding, and a floor-length gown isn't something they probably think they'd "wear again."

    So after you tell people "formal" let it go... people will dress appropriately and your wedding will be lovely!
  • edited December 2011
    When one of FI's cousins married last year, she had a wedding website which indicated "black tie" and outlined appropriate Indian and non-Indian formal attire....

    There was still that one guy in a blue Hawaiian shirt!

    We are planning to do a similar thing and hope blue Hawaiian shirts don't appear.
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