Offbeat Weddings


Or no theme? That is the question.

I am a very simple person. I would love to have just an elegant wedding ceremony outside and reception either inside or outside under a tent. Very simple will flowers pink and green would be my colors.

But I have never been one to just do what everyone else is doing. I have always wanted to do a 1920's themed wedding, with flapper dresses and a swing band.

Every day I got back and forth with both ideas. Is a simple wedding too boring? Does a theme wedding take too much time and effort? Help!

Re: Theme?

  • Hrm. I’m thinking that there’s really no one answer to any of those questions. Do what you want. Themed weddings can be thrilling or boring. So can non-themed weddings. Some people will be bored no matter what. Don’t try to please them, but do consider their physical comfort in your decisions. In addition, you (and the FI) know the type of people you are including in the event as to whether they care (or whether you care if they do).

    There are PLENTY of Gatsby-esque themed ideas out there to provide a lot of options. You can use it with subtlety or be overt about it. It can be simple or ornate. Entirely up to you. Ironically, it was known as the Decade of Decadence, of course. Jazz was the music that EXPLODED during that era- Chicago Jazz, Boogie Woogie, Urban Society Jazz, etc. Swing and big band were the 1940s (not that it matters in the least if that’s what you want!)

    As for time and effort, well that depends on several things. if you want to be historically spot-on, then expect to spend a LOT of time researching not only the era, but also prices and places to find those things. If you aren’t so worried about accuracy, then just go for the general gist. If you incorporate a lot of DIY projects, expect that to take TIME. (always more than you think.)

    You and your FI alone decide how much of your and your FI’s life you are going to let this event take up. It’s that simple. Think through it together, set boundaries and realistic expectations. (the best advice we received from a couple that were on our same timeline was this: “choose 10 things that you really want and be happy if you get 3 of them.” My only addition is this: one of these 3 things had better be that you come out of it married.)



    My motto = I was a queen before the man: I'll be damned if some wedding is going to demote me.
  • As PP said, make this choice based on what YOU and YOUR FI want, not what you think will please everyone else. Once you've decided if you're doing the theme or not, then that's when the choices involve everyone else (aka you don't want to inconvenience/make anyone uncomfortable, but the fact of there being a theme or not won't hurt anyone, its all in how its executed).
  • In the 1920s, tents were new and fashionable for upscale events to keep the sun off everyone.  Having a simple ceremony with pink and green flowers in a tent sounds lovely.  

    You can bring out the flapper dresses and swing band for the recepetion.  Add in retro cocktails and the Charlestown and you have a great party to celebrate your wedding. 

    You can have both. 
  • Some friends of ours had a 1920s themed wedding in a relative's 1920s house, and it was wonderful (she wore a regular wedding gown, but he was in 20s style suit). They asked their guests to follow the theme, and some dressed in flapper style. My FI and I chose to wear "regular" 1920s style clothes. I actually MADE a dress! It was a lot of fun. Not everyone dressed up, and there was everything from flapper to newpaper boy looks, but it was a lot of fun -- the guest list was small, and I'm pretty sure they invited folks they knew would "get it", thereby adding to the fun.
  • We're having a small wedding without a theme. I wouldn't say it's boring, just traditional. I think the key is figuring out what represents you and FI. Whatever that is - do that! :)
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